@Lady_V i feel the same way in a sense...........my cousin put his scan in a build-a-bear for his next kid or if he doesnt have one just as a keepsake....i just had my mc on feb 3 and the whole ER unit could hear me crying........i cried last night right after our bd too bc i just feel like 2 months in a row isnt likely......i feel ur pain but u just gotta get up n focus on the positives in life...... we didnt think we could have kids bc my hubby only has 1 testi but we managed to get our angel whose to say we wont get our rainbow
@Lady_V I'm so sorry. You've obviously wanted this baby for such a long time. Miscarriage is so hard to deal with in any circumstances but after all this time it must be really hitting you hard. I totally get what you mean about feeling you have no one to talk to. All my family and friends have been so supportive, but I feel like you can only talk about it so many times. It's been 2 months since my miscarriage and I really feel like I should just be back to normal now and not bothering people by being upset all the time. But it's so hard to carry on as normal. Your daughter sounds amazing, and you obviously have a brilliant bond. I think you're right to try and put on a brave face for her, but dont worry if you have times when you need to be upset. She'll understand, and I'm sure the rest of your family will too. I really hope that things work well in the coming months. Have you ever looked into any alternative therapies? I have fertility accupuncture and really feel like it helps. If you every need to come and let off steam I'm always here to listen. I wish I could say something to make everything better. But just stay strong, be kind to yourself, and believe that things will get better xxx
@EmJ3 I'm more in peace than ever. It's certainly the best decision. It's a hard day alone with toddler, can't move well I'm in pain falling asleep on floor. Lots of stuff to sort out at uni. I'm exhausted.
@MadDoda sending lots of love. Pleased you are finding some peace in your decision. Sounds like you're having such a tough day and I really hope things feel a little better soon. I really appreciate all the support and advice you have given me xxx
I’m really glad you feel good with your decision @MadDoda. I think it’s freeing and empowering once you’ve made a decision. I hope you heal really quickly.xxxx
Hello to all the ladies going through loss right now or previously ,I am going through it now 2nd time in 8mths and again coming to terms with the loss of any hopes and dreams I had with this pregnancy . Trying to figure out if there is anything medically wrong or if it's just very bad luck twice in a row. Now me and my partner have to decide what we want to do future wise ,he isnt sure if we should try again as in his words with each miscarriage it gets harder and harder ,or hoping next time we will be lucky and ok ,I really dont know, I didnt think this would happen once never mind twice .its mentally dealing with the aftermath and the sadness you feel ,I'm unsure if I'm too scared to try again
@90schick so so sorry to hear of your two losses. And I can understand your worry of a future pregnancy. I wish all miscarriages could be tested, as waiting to have 3 before you find out if something is wrong is so cruel. I hope you and your husband can come to the right decision together. Sending lots of love.
I often think how much easier life would be if I could see into the future. Ultimately it doesnt matter how long it takes for me to have my rainbow baby, I just want someone to be able to tell me that it definitely will happen at some point! X
@90schick im so sorry it wasn't good news for you, I know how you feel I went through the same in 2019. Ttc is such hard work, you need to just do whats best for you as a family I understand what he means by it gets harder each time. sending you lots of love xx
@amnx thank you I didnt think it would be good news ,but now I'm stuck with having two and not knowing why . I have a gp app next week but I dont expect her to say alot .@mrsb2010 yes I know ,unfortunately no one can really give us that certain reassurance, my gp stated to me after my first miscarriage that it doesn't mean it will happen again and yet it has . X
Options as in what ?@amnx I havent had the chance yet I have a gp app booked next week and that's been booked over a week already. Obviously this is only just happening ,j only started bleeding yesterday evening x
@amnx also thinks its awfull how they let people lose 3 babies b4 they will intervene . My partner is saying if they cant give us any help or clue why then we shouldn't try again x
ahhh okay, when were you due back at the hosp? sorry I thought you had been back this week and they had discussed the options of natural, the pessaries or a d&c. it is, I don't see why we should have to go through it 3 times before they will do anything, how is that good for our mental health? im not even sure what tests they do after a 3rd one, but I know they said to me they send the "product" off for testing in my case to Birmingham, in your case I assume it will be like whatever university hospital or specialist is near you. I know another lady on here who had a d&c just before me and they gave her a plaque which I thought was lovely, I didn't get anything. whatever you choose to do whether to try again or not be kind to yourself and allow yourself to grieve xx
@amnx you must be not to far from me as Birmingham is a hour away .I went bak earlier than planned for a scan as hav had two days of stomach ache and slight brown discharge it was the same as last time so that confirmed that. Then I still hav to keep my scan date for next tues . I agree its mentally it affects you more than anything.its such bloody risk ttc again and all that anxiety, listening to lacey turner this week can totally relate to her . I'm afraid myself and my partner may be on different pages now ,and I can totally see where he is coming from as it's best to just leave it no worry be happy with what u have ,but the other part of me thinks what if ,what if wer ok next time and we have a lovely baby to add to the family and have some healing finally in this whole grieving chapter of loss and sadness x
@90schick im Wolverhampton, how about you? ahhh okay maybe by then it will have all come away, im surprised they didn't talk to you about things then. but maybe there is still a chance? FX!! I know its a matter of what ifs isn't it, if you don't try you don't know but at the same time you need to prepare yourself for if the worst was to happen again and how you would all cope with it. maybe in a few months when things settle down and its not as raw you could think about if you both want to try again or not? we didn't even really talk about the pregnancy the 2nd time I fell pregnant we kind of avoided the subject because we were scared to be happy xx
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it is, I don't see why we should have to go through it 3 times before they will do anything, how is that good for our mental health? im not even sure what tests they do after a 3rd one, but I know they said to me they send the "product" off for testing in my case to Birmingham, in your case I assume it will be like whatever university hospital or specialist is near you. I know another lady on here who had a d&c just before me and they gave her a plaque which I thought was lovely, I didn't get anything.
whatever you choose to do whether to try again or not be kind to yourself and allow yourself to grieve xx
im Wolverhampton, how about you?
ahhh okay maybe by then it will have all come away, im surprised they didn't talk to you about things then. but maybe there is still a chance? FX!!
I know its a matter of what ifs isn't it, if you don't try you don't know but at the same time you need to prepare yourself for if the worst was to happen again and how you would all cope with it. maybe in a few months when things settle down and its not as raw you could think about if you both want to try again or not? we didn't even really talk about the pregnancy the 2nd time I fell pregnant we kind of avoided the subject because we were scared to be happy xx