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If you've just miscarried and need some support



  • @EmJ3 actually i was exercising 6 days a week and go t9 kickboxing once or twice a week since Easter. I worked out loads, to build up strength in arms and back and loose some weight. I'm 64kg and want my 58 back... I had to stop exercising when semester go tough I was studying caring for a kid and studying some more, and was still not enough.. I also didn't loose a single kg,  my thyroid is messing my whole life. I intended to restart my work out nor, but all this happened and I can't yet.  Hopefully will start in few days when I feel better. I kept my kickboxing until exams,  then I couldn't do even that, I will return to it too. I rly miss it, it made me feel better and kickboxing is the best.. Doing 6kg weights on one arm was amazing, I still carry my 15mo on one arm,  not even on a hip. But I feel i got a lot weaker. 

    Anyway I kNow u can understand that's why I'm keep coming here, it's just that comfort I cant find elsewhere. 
  • God you’re very fit! I gave up the gym when I got pregnant with Matilda because I was worried it’d hurt her but I’m definitely joining back. It really does help my mood.xxxx
  • @EmJ3 not as much anymore, but i will be. It's understandable, I thought about it a lot and decides not to stop neither exercises not kickboxing when pregnant, I would just implement changes. Gym is boring, I exercise at home, I used to do 3 exercises for arms shoulders and back with weights, 100 wide squats 100 leg pulls a day. You could work out at home too. With small baby u have time to do this. Well I did at least. 
  • I only stopped because when I mc again last summer they said not to exercise too much- at that point I’d been hammering it so I panicked! 

    Yeah defo. Think I’m going to get my exercise dvds out. I need to lose a couple of stones now! The steroids seem to be having a negative impact on my weight- is this true? That’s what the doctor said but my weight is doing my head in!xxx
  • If they would tell me to stop I would for sure. Don't know about steroids, but could be. 

    Dunno how to accept my body again, I also think my dh is reaching breaking point. Not sure what to do about this. He will not tell me first sure, coz he knows what state I am in. 
  • Oh @MadDoda I so know how you feel. I'm totally lost and struggling to be a good mam to my son. I also thought of going to drs but realised it's pointless as I know I'm in the very early stages of grief and no medication or counselling is going to change the fact that i found out my baby had died less than 2 weeks ago! I agree that exercise helps, I want to get back into swimming once the bleeding stops. I wish I could say something useful to help you @MadDoda, I have nothing but am here for anytime you need to talk. No harm in saying the same thing again and again, I think it just helps to know someone is listening. It definitely feels like very few people understand so it's good we can talk to each other. @EmJ3 I love that you have an insight into what it's like to have your rainbow baby. It does give me hope that things will get better, but I'm terrified of having another miscarriage or struggling to fall pregnant again. Steroids definitely affect weight, so a lot of your extra weight will be down to that and not your fault. Hope you can find a way to feel better. Will you be on steroids for a long time? Xxx
  • Thank you Mrs B,  it really helps me being here and talking to you all. I somehow can't even complain too much at ttc thread anymore, I just feel like I'm a burden to them in there. Can't drag the mood down every day, everyone needs positivity. I totally understand ur fear of more struggles. I'm terrified of every cycle, I fall pregnant at crazy rate and that bfp is worst than bfn... When I mced frost time I was scared it will keep happening, but I got my baby. So when I miscarried again this year, I couldn't believe... Then I thought OK mb it's like last time, so when I got pregnant again, I was full of happiness and joy... Then It happened again, I was angry like never before, on myself for getting hopeful and whole world. Then the real fear started, but I thought, no there us still chance it was random. That thought was crushed with my last mc, I officially joined lucky 1% of women with rpl. It's extremely small chance, there is no way it will get u too. I'm sure you will be fine, if ur healthy is good and u already got a child, it will be OK. 
  • Thanks @MadDoda please dont ever feel like you're bringing the mood down here. It's likely I'll not have any good advice but would really like you to feel you can just come and let off steam. Like I say, even if you say the same thing again and again its ok. Because that little bit of relief you get from sharing your worries with someone is so important. And it helps me so much talking to you, you're so reassuring. I havent had that dread of a bfp before, it must be terrifying and so confusing for you. I hope you get your turn very soon, you certainly deserve it xxx
  • Mrs B thank you so much for being kind, it really helps me, when there is someone who can understand. Let's get our healthy babies in 2020. 
  • @MRSB2010 and @MadDoda for anyone who’s lost a baby, or more than one, it’s actually terrifying when you see that bfp. You desperately want to be excited and you are ecstatic for maybe 10 mins a day but for the rest of the time, the anxiety is really bad. Every day that passes, helps and I found it becomes a little easier once you’ve passed your previous mc weeks but it’s tricky throughout. 

    I’m positive that you will both get your rainbows! 

    Come on here and chat whenever you need to rant or are upset. It really helped me with my losses- it was a godsend. 

    @mrsb- I have a blood clotting disorder that I developed when I was pregnant with my angel baby last year, so I’ve been on steroids for nearly a year now. My consultant has put me on other medication as well as the steroids so hopefully I can come off them soon!🤞🏻🤞🏻🤞🏻Xxx
  • Thanks @EmJ3 I'm sure of I'm lucky enough to fall pregnant again itll feel very different, especially the first 12 weeks while I wait for a scan. Hopefully like you both say things will be different next time. 
    Wow nearly a year on steroids! You must be so fed up, the side affects can be pretty nasty. Really hope they get you sorted soon and onto something a bit nicer to take! Xx
  • I had a good sleep thx to dh and because of that I woke up with clear mind and Gabi is starting to feel better too. So my brain went on high gear again and I have been reading up. I think I found promising simple but not definitive solution for my problem. Going as deep as root of the problem. I'm so glad u can open scientific article and I understand every single thing. My late studies are paying off I guess. So how I'm in a good mood. Coz if I try hard I can treat myself. All I need is my polish endo and private prescription for a lot of hormone I'm already taking. 
  • @MadDoda that’s brilliant! I really hope it works. Fingers crossed you get your next bfp really soon! It’s so good that you understand all the science behind it all. You sound so much more positive- it’s amazing what sleep can do. I always find that I feel a little better after a sleep, particularly when you are running on empty. I’m glad Gabi is a bit better too- great news.  Xxx
  • Maybe u will be able to finally move on. Thanks for being here for me. Lots of love.
  • This sounds really positive @MadDoda! Fingers crossed you can get what you need and have a successful pregnancy. Ifs so good you can do all the research yourself and work it all out. Seems like you've not been getting the help you need from the drs xx
  • Mrs B luckily I study a lot of related stuff, directly it indirectly and I got access to scientific data base, almost all world wide. So I can read current studies with evidence. It's very reassuring, I self diagnosed every single thing wrong with me. So yeah drs are not my favourite ATM.
  • Amazing! Yeah you must be so frustrated with them. Just pleased things are a bit better for you today 😊 xx
  • Thank you and how are u holding up? It's almost new year and new start.
  • I've had a really bad day today. Just can't stop crying. Came straight to bed after putting my little boy to bed as just dont know what to do with myself. I want to try again for another baby but obviously it's going to be a little while before I stop bleeding and can get back to normal. I just feel like my life has stopped and every day seems to last so long. I know things will get better, and the new year is definitely a positive thing to look towards, but at the moment everything seems hopeless. And I'm so scared that I'm going to have difficulty having another baby. Really trying to stay positive, and yesterday I did really well. But today is a bad day xx
  • It's hard, but it slowly get better. You just need to stop bleeding, it's always a little easier on mind if you don't see blood anymore. Why dont u join us on ttc thread, we got a thread where is a bunch if us surviving it together. We just made a new one "hoping for a bfp in January..." . You will have a lot support there and help with tracking methods to maximise ur chances. @EmJ3 always comes by too.
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