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Pregnant again, paralysed by fear

Hi ladies, I had 3 5weeks mcs. 2 recently, just after my son. Now I'm pregnant again, 4+2, I'm a wreck. My mood is swinging like crazy, I'm so terrified, I'm counting days until that dreaded week5. I don't know how to cope, I'm looking for advise on how to deal with this. I'm sure that I will be better once I reach week6, but it seems like eternity...


  • Hey @MadDoda I can only imagine how you feel. I just had my first mc and it was awful but need to move forward. I’m 34 and would like to start trying asap. How long did you wait? Are you seeing a fertility specialist? I’m over a regular ob just saying “it happens” “there is nothing to be done” fertility dr actually do blood work and early scans ( all from my friends telling me) I really hope this pregnancy sticks. Will say a prayer for you 
  • I didn't wait, I was trying immediately after each, I track bbt so I knew when I ov before first period.  I had 2 consecutive mcs u need 3 to be referred.  Besides I know why it happens, drs just to daft. Thanks for a good wish. 
  • Oh ok my OBGYN today told me to wait 3 months. Thought that seemed a little long 
  • MadDodaMadDoda Regular
    edited Dec 12, 2019 10:58PM
    Did u have early mc or later one? Coz there is no reason to wait lol. If I would have waited dunno if I would have my son. I fallen with him straight after first mc, before first period. Did he give u reasoning? I would get second opinion. Are u in UK or us?
  • I was 8 weeks and it happened naturally. She said so my body can heal? She wants me to get my hcg checked in 3 weeks to make sure it went down. Did you have to do that? I’m in the US. 
  • That explains a lot, I'm in UK. It's hard to get referred. Well u can't ovulate until hcg drops, I had negative when bleeding started each time. I still don't think u should wait, I mean if u feel ready go for it, but if I'm doubt get second opinion. I would just so hpt and check how is hcg sooner than wait 3weeks. But u will need opk and or bbt coz ur cycle will be a real mess.

    I'm sorry for ur loss
  • I didn’t need a referral my insurance covers it. Thank you and beat of luck to you
  • Thank you and baby dust to u
  • Congratulations @MadDoda hope you can can find a way to take the edge off the fear and worry.
    I'm no expert or been in your situation but maybe try some sort of meditation, look for a hobby to distract you for next few weeks. With Xmas coming up maybe you could get hold of some Xmasy bits my friend just made her own reif for her and family. 
    Sending lots of calming vibes and well wishes 😇❤️ xx
  • It's too early for congrats... Keep that for now...

    Unfortunately it's difficult,  I still got one exam so I have to study and got a baby to care for, and while I do it's bit burning sometimes so mind drifts. So I don't have time for my work out nor the usual kickboxing class :( 

    Thanks tho
  • I know how you feel now as I had 3mc before my son. My anxiety was over the top... With panic attack. It went to point that I needed to ask for help.
    I been waiting till 8 weeks first (one of mc was at 7 weeks), than dreading first scan, than waiting for movements hoping it will help with anxiety, but that made it even worth as I started panicking any moment I haven't felt baby... Than I had problems with movement, but baby was fine.
    I used to meditate a lot, do yoga and started new course so I can think bout something else, not fear to loose baby. Also when I had panic attack I called my MW and asked to listen to a heartbit, and that always helped me. But please don't get home doppler as it will make your anxiety hit you twice
  • I been there with my son, but it's much worse Now. And there isn't much I can do with baby at home and exams. I'm looking fwd to next week, exams will be over and I can restart my work out. I'm not a fan of yoga or meditation. I'm more of  a very active things. I want to go back to kickboxing,  but first I need to reach the dreaded 6weeks. It's too early even to bother midwife and not a chance for a heartbeat for another few weeks. It's just so hopeless. 
  • Try not to think about pregnancy and also don't check wipe every time you are on toilet. It is horrible that you can't enjoy and be happy about pregnancy, so better not to think bout it at all
  • I'm sure u know that, but it's easy to say. I cant even ficus on my studies, it's bad. 

    I think talking to clueless gp made me a lot worse, I was fairly calm until I spoke with her. It's sad that lol who are supposed to help is, just make things worse. And I find women gp are the worst.
  • My GP was really horrible and unsupportive. Give a call your local mental health clinic they will help. 
    It was hard for me to start with not thinking about pregnancy, but then I started to be extra busy and that all paid off. Start of my pregnancy was near Christmas, as yours is, so focus on Christmas - movies, songs, shopping and ect. 
  • Hahaha I'm spotting 
  • @MadDoda spotting doesn't mean mc. I know few ladies who been bleeding all pregnancy and still had babies... I had spotting and it was because I had irritated cervix.
    Call local EPU and explain them you situation (your thyroid diagnosis) and you had mc before... They might see you today
  • Oh yes, It does, I recognise it just too well.

    I already spoke with pregnancy unit, I argumented them and they agreed to giVe me progesterone. I feel this time is different. I know it's mc coming, I'm sure it is, but I know I can save it. My pregnancy symptoms are still here, first time ever. I think I'm gonna pray a lot from today lol
  • Wow! That's good!!! Really hope you will save this pregnancy.... Good think they agreed to help you to save it! 
  • I used arguments and looks like I fall in small subset of ppl who can benefit from it according to that study they did. 
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