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Devastated, third missed miscarriage

So last September I found out I was pregnant, I have PCOS so the fact this happened on my own is amazing. We tried for years before with one miscarriage and one live birth (my daughter). In November we went for an ultrasound and the baby was gone ( my body reabsorbed it). We were heartbroken! We waited until Feb to try again and we used letrozole and ovadril, we got our positive pregnancy! I went in for my 8-week ultrasound last week and there was no heartbeat. The ultrasound tech wouldn't say miscarriage, she kept trying to say I could be a lot less pregnant than I thought; that is highly unlikely. I have to wait two weeks for another ultrasound, this is killing me. I have been googling no heartbeat at the 8-week scan and I will see stuff about pregnancies being viable after ultrasound missed heartbeat. This does me no good but makes me more nervous, I know that stuff is rare.
This will be my third missed miscarriage, I hate walking around knowing my baby is still inside me not alive. I did everything I was supposed to do for a healthy pregnancy, I don't know why this happened. I will be 39 years old next month so time is not on my side. I can't sleep, my stomach is upset,  I have panic feelings all the time. We want our daughter to have a sibling, I don't want to go through more losses though. We are considering IVF so that we can pick viable eggs, but that is so expensive which causes more anxiety on my part. To make matters worse I see a lot of my friends who recently had babies post their happy beautiful new additions and it makes me sad. 

Replies

  • Hi there,
    I, too, am experiencing a missed miscarriage. I went in for my ultrasound yesterday with no heartbeat. I also have to wait a week for them to confirm what I already know.

    I know how hard this feels, you're not alone <3 you're so, so strong, no matter the outcome.
  • @Jenn536 hi ,I'm sorry ,I know exactly how u feel I've had 2 consecutive miscarriages since last june. I know the heartbreak the disappointment the why etc etc and ur terribly brave to try again a 2nd and 3rd time ,I'm also 39 so I know how that comes into it tick tock which makes the pressure worse , I had a normal miscarriage and then a missed one .I'm sorry I know it hurts and I too am terrified of trying again it's a leap of hope that you dont know wether to take xx
  • @Jenn536 I too had 2 week wait and that was tough , I knew that it wasnt going to be good news though as I was certain of my dates . Its awfull x
  • Hi

    I'm so sorry to hear this. I too have had missed miscarriages and also 2 x 5+4 week spontaneous losses.

    I went in for my 12 week scan on Monday this week and saw that the baby had died at just over 8 weeks. She did an internal scan to double check there definitely wasn't a heartbeat (the dates would have been completely wrong for it to have been an 8 week pregnancy anyway) and I'm going in for another ERPC on Friday. 

    Did the sonographer not offer you an internal scan to see better?

    I am also considered an older mum as I'm just over 40, so also understand that time is not on our side at all. We will be trying again straight away for that reason, but we are both completely devastated x
  • Jenn536 said:
    So last September I found out I was pregnant, I have PCOS so the fact this happened on my own is amazing. We tried for years before with one miscarriage and one live birth (my daughter). In November we went for an ultrasound and the baby was gone ( my body reabsorbed it). We were heartbroken! We waited until Feb to try again and we used letrozole and ovadril, we got our positive pregnancy! I went in for my 8-week ultrasound last week and there was no heartbeat. The ultrasound tech wouldn't say miscarriage, she kept trying to say I could be a lot less pregnant than I thought; that is highly unlikely. I have to wait two weeks for another ultrasound, this is killing me. I have been googling no heartbeat at the 8-week scan and I will see stuff about pregnancies being viable after ultrasound missed heartbeat. This does me no good but makes me more nervous, I know that stuff is rare.
    This will be my third missed miscarriage, I hate walking around knowing my baby is still inside me not alive. I did everything I was supposed to do for a healthy pregnancy, I don't know why this happened. I will be 39 years old next month so time is not on my side. I can't sleep, my stomach is upset,  I have panic feelings all the time. We want our daughter to have a sibling, I don't want to go through more losses though. We are considering IVF so that we can pick viable eggs, but that is so expensive which causes more anxiety on my part. To make matters worse I see a lot of my friends who recently had babies post their happy beautiful new additions and it makes me sad. 
    I also have PCOS and fell naturally don't despair it will happen 💕
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