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I'm Back :cry:

Hi ladies, as some of you know I was told yesterday I have suffered from my 2nd MMC. I am just devastated. Thats 2 in less than 3 and a half months.
I have to go in on tuesday for a D&C and am really scared as last time they gave me a pessary which put me into labour and ended up needing morphine.

I really don't know if I ever want to ttc again. I don't think I could cope with it happeneing again and its not fair on my OH or my DS. I have always wanted a large family and wanted another for my OH (I have two lo's but one was from a previous relationship).

I know im rambling and there is quite a few of us back here over the past couple of weeks but I just feel like screaming. What am I doing wrong? MMC are not common but to have 2 in such a short time is scarey.

I did ask the consultant yesterday if I had ttc too soon after last time and she said no that should not have made any difference.

Sorry for this mess of a post, just wanted to write it down xxx

[Modified by: *Babylove* on 28 August 2010 11:51:24 ]

Replies

  • Babylove, I feel for you so much. I can't imagine how hard two m/c's must be in such a short space of time. Just one is bad enough. I think its totally natural for you to feel like you never want to try again. I'm sure it will pass. I beat myself up repeatedly about letting everyone down and not givig my DH a baby, but there is no way that they blame us. I know my hubby just felt awful that he couldn't do anything to make me feel better. Give yourself some time, the pain doesn't go away, but it gets easier xx
  • oh hun, i'm soooo sorry to here that it's happened again. Nobody should have to suffer that pain again. As for not wanting to TTC just take your time and rest both mentaltly and physical (easier said than done i know) and then decide what ye both want, just remember us ladies are here for u if u ever need to gat things off ur chest.

    hugsxxxxxxx

    chaxxx
  • Hi babylove.. I'm so sorry hun! It's a horrible thing to go through one time but two.. I just feel awful for you. Don't blame yourself whatever you do. And just take as much time as you need. Ttc again will be a scary prospect can understand that, again I'm sure you will find the courage and it will get easier a little each day. Take care and will be thinking about you this week. X
  • hi babylove I felt just like you - didnt think I could do this again. I have had two miscarraiges, one in Jan and the other in July and we are just starting to TTC again...it is hard and I still have bad days but it something we both want so will keep going for it. We have no children yet so that is what is helping us along.
    I think what I am trying to say is, just give yourself time.....that is all you need and you will get through this and try again
    xx
  • Babylove don't beat yourself up, I know how hard it is being in exactly the same situation as you, so many times I've wondered what I've done wrong but I think this makes it worse. My mw told me that a doc at the hospital runs a clinic for ladies who'd suffered recurrent mc's an he decided to change the criteria from having had 3 mc's to 2, the clinic was overrun an when they put it back to 3 then only 2-3 ladies went each fortnight. She said 2 concurrent mc's are a lot more common than we think. Don't give up hope, but give yourself time to grieve. Don't think about ttc until you are over your op, you don't have to make any decisions until your ready. We've decided to wait until the new year to try again, mainly because my body's been through the mill twice thus year and I've had enough of being pregnant and then it breaking my heart. I think time to just enjoy ourselves is what we need. I hope all goes well on tuesday, then you can start to think about the future. I hope you feel better soon, lots of love xx
  • Hi Babylove, its so sad, you, me and kwn are all going through this at the moment. I didn't think 2 mmc in a row was common, but apparently is, its not making me feel better tho. I keep thinking why me, but its nothing we have done sweetie, so please try not to beat yourself up about it. Like kwn said, I think we are going to have a break from ttc for a bit, I too feel like I need to give my body a bit of a break. I hope all goes ok for you on Tues. Take care. Zxx
  • Babylove - my heart goes out to your. 1 MMC is hard enough - but 2 in a row must be just devstating. As another post, having no children makes us want to ttc again but you need to get yourself physicallt, mentally and emotionall into the right place. It is not your fault or anything you did. I don't know who common or not it is- it is just so so unfair. When you need to cry then do it - don't hold it in - let the heartbreak and emotion out. We are all here for you. x x
  • BL sooooo so sorry hun, I'm here if you need a chat and like you I have asked myself that same question after each mc (3 now this year 1mmc and 2mc's) but here I am still trying, that desire will return but just give yourself time to heal.
  • Hiya hun just wanted to say I hope today went as well as days like today can. Hope your not too sore and can have a few days rest....hard with a LO but hopefully someone is on hand to help out. Has your son gone back to school yet or is he next week? Hope your not having to deal with the school run.
    Anyway hun big hugs and as usual we are all here if you want to chat/ vent etc.
    Take care Sue x
  • Hi babylove, hope your op went as well as it could do for you. Big hugs. Zxx
  • Hi Babylove, just checking in to see how the op went.

    ((((((((((((hugs))))))))))))
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