Forum home› Archived Birth Clubs› My baby was born in Apr 2010
🚨 Advance warning 🚨 This forum will be closing on 1st May – please see our pinned thread for more information.

Does anyone else worry....

Little_BuggarooLittle_Buggaroo
in My baby was born in Apr 2010
that when they have another baby that the won't be as excited or have enough love to go around?

DH and I have decided that we will start TTC to conceive when Holly-Kate turns one (if I can wait that long), but I really worry that I won't be as exicted about the pregnancy as I was the first time round. The feeling of love is so overwhelming as well, I can't help but think that I would love our next baby as much.

I really can't wait to have another baby, so I know I will have enough love but my mind goes into over drive thinking about things like this! Silly Me!!!



Replies

  • JumbliesJumblies
    Believe me, every pregnancy is exciting even if you've done it before. And you'll be amazed by just how much your love grows, not only for your new bundle but for the child/children you have already.
  • Feebs76Feebs76
    I totally promise you that you will! Its weird but it is just as amazing 2nd time around - and it still feels new somehow too as you forget so much of the early stuff!!

    Only thing is that other people aren't quite as excited even my dh took longer to bond with grace as he kept comparing her to dd1. For me it was instant though and equally amazing.
  • Ruth77Ruth77
    It's not something I've ever thought about as we're not talking about TTC again yet, but my SIL had a massive worry with this - she literally didn't think it would be possible to love her 2nd child as much -once he was born though this wasn't at all an issue - he is now 2 and she worships him just as much as no1!! x
  • RED_DRESSRED_DRESS
    Yep I worry about that entirely and we're not even planning a second yet. I mentioned it to my friend (who is trying) and has the same concerns. She had spoken to a friend of hers about it who recently had her second and allayed her fears. She said if anything she fell a little out of love with her first because they were so demanding when the baby arrived. Which sounds awful but I'm sure it doesn't happen to everyone and doesn't last.
    xx
  • Feebs76Feebs76
    She said if anything she fell a little out of love with her first because they were so demanding when the baby arrived. Which sounds awful but I'm sure it doesn't happen to everyone and doesn't last.

    This is true actually - it's not so much that I loved DD1 any less but in the early days my instinct was to focus on Grace so I had to make a conscious effort to pay as much attention as before to DD1. I'm sure it's just a hormonal/tiredness thing - all the chemicals in your body are making you want to focus on nurturing your newborn so it's easy to get irritated by an energetic toddler. It really didn't last long though - a week or so at most - and then you adjust to the fact that your attention needs to be split between your 2 babies. You also start to see the relationship between your children which is so lovely - when DD1 plays with or cuddles Grace or wants to show/tell her something it really makes me mushy!

    The other thing I found was that my attention naturally focused on the child that everyone else wasn't focused on. So in the very early days, my family were really great at making DD1 know she was still centre of attention and I felt a bit sensitive about Grace and the fact that other people didn't love her as much as they did DD1. Then I visited my Great Grandad and Great Aunt and they were obsessed with Grace and ignored DD1 (who'd previously been the apple of their eye) a little bit so I felt really protective towards her and her feelings.
Sign In or Register to comment.