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Nervously waiting

One week until AF is due. I have never felt this nervous about it before, but this time I'm actually pooping it!

Couple of reasons I think-

1. that for some reason I always had a due date of March 2012 in my mind for the next one (not that I want that date; it's more of an instinct that is the date we are going to get if that makes any sense)

2. that with my other pregnancies, I didn't expect the BFPs I got when I got them, just tested on instinct. I just feel that this time, when I actually am anxiously awaiting BFP I won't get it

I was very positive that we would get PG this month (a few weeks after MCing) but now we are at the stage where we could find out soon I now feel really negative. I am analysing every little symptom which I have never done before. The way I feel this time (mentally) is so different from any of my 2wws before

What also isn't helping is that with Haiden it was the equivalent of this evening I got my (unexpected) BFP, and I POAS this morning and nothing. I also got implantation bleeding with her which I haven't had so far. I know it could still be too early for stuff but when you have experienced an early BFP you think you could get the same again, you know?

I think I have built it up so much in my head that is going to be this month that if it isn't I am going to be really upset, when other times I'm just a bit disappointed.

I keep thinking, the three times I have been PG I have conceived 2nd cycle (not knowing cycle so having no clue when ov in 1st cycle), 2nd cycle (again not knowing ov as had just had the ectopic operation so no idea what 1st cycle would be like afterwards), 1st cycle (based oving on cycle going straight back to normal after coming off the pill). So based on how quickly it seems to happen there is no reason that I won't fall PG this month. Then I think, yes there is, I only have one tube- I could have OVd from my right ovary and the egg didn't cross over to my other tube

Oh dear, I do go on don't I?! Just had these thoughts going round and round my head the last few days so had to get them down somewhere!! xx


  • Good luck Kimmy, and try to relax! Pathetic advice but you know that that is what you'd say to someone else in your position. Breathe image

    By the way, with Roisin I had an implantation bleed, this time I didn't. With Roisin I got a strong BFP 1 day before my missed period, this time I didn't until the day. This time I suspected I was pregnant by a metallic taste in my mouth, never had that with Roisin!

    Really hope this is it for you Kimmy but don't panic if not, I'm sure you have a BFP round the corner at just the right time.

    Keep us updated! Xx
  • Thanks for your reply. Unfortunately AF came yesterday PM, a week early. Pretty upset about it, and doesn't help that I'm not feeling too well either. Feeling very sorry for myself today x
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