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Mummies with toddlers

How are you coping with a toddler and newborn? Lorelei is really taken with Niamh as we thought she would be though we are having to try and make her realise that she has to be gentle around her without making her feel bad or like she's being told off. I think we've got a right balance and for the most part there seems to be no issues, however she has started night waking wanting cuddles.

I don't know if it's because of Niamh or because from Dec, we moved house, she moved nursery, had her birthday, christmas then my BIL, sister and mum coming to stay to help when baby was born and she got a bit spoilt. It has been an upheaval for her so I totally understand but at same time, we've been giving her lots of attention and loving so I hate the thought she might be feeling pushed out. I do hope it's just a phase but hard to know how exactly to handle it cos if she's feeling left out (although we think she shouldn't feel that way, she feels how she feels) then need to give her attention, but at same time, can't let her continue to wake 2-3 times a night wanting rocked to sleep! We had only just got her sleeping through the night about Sept/ oct time and now back to square one image

It's not just because the girls are waking in tandem so I rarely get more than 2hours sleep at a time but I hate the thought of my wee woman feeling neglected


  • Ah Hun bet your exhausted.

    It sounds like your doing everything you can to keep her feeling loved and not pushed out.

    It's hard to not snap and sound like your telling them off when your so tired.

    Ethan is 6 and fairly independent but it's still very hard work. Like you we've had Xmas his birthday and baby but he's also had our undivided attention for the last 6 years!! He still sleeps fine but his behaviour is the issue. He's become very cheeky and stroppy which is really not like him.

    He's getting better as I've discovered if he's kept amused and busy he's fine!! Not easy when tired!! Lol!!

    If it carries in and you do start to struggle it might be worth speaking to health visitor fir any tips.

    Your doing a fab job hun.

    How's your scar healing now? Have you been good? Lol!!

  • Mummy chop I could of written this post!

    Jennifer was 3 on dec 30th so she's also had Christmas, birthday, started nursery and the new baby ( and was very spoilt by everyone) She started waking up at night just after Jake was born and when you ask her what she wants she says " a hug " we also think it's just everything that has been going on unsettling her but now the poor little thing is in hospital ( its been awful as jake isnt allowed on the ward so been torn in two) she has been diagnosed with glandular fever and tonsilitous as a secondary infection they have put her on the list to have them out but can't operate until she's stronger.... I think it's going to be a while before she starts sleeping through image

    I hope lorelei starts sleeping soon.

    X x x
  • I've found that ELoise is a bit more tearful than usual and she is always wanting in beside us at night, at the moment I have given up on that fight, she goes into her bed but wakes up guaranteed every night in the early hours.

    Hopefully it's just a phase that will pass

    Vicky xx
  • Poor Jennifer, feeling like that then being ill can't be nice for her and must be so tough for you too. I can't imagine having to go see any my girls in hospital let alone be torn - you have my sympathy.

    In the nicest possible way, I'm glad I'm not only one going through this! It is a tough enough time without the added worry but I guess that's part of the deal really isn't it?

    Lorelei wakes and shouts Mummy cuddle/ Daddy cuddle - that;s all she wants but it's not a case of a quick cuddle and back to sleep, she wants us to stay with her cuddling. I guess just have to keep doing what we're doing and hopefully she'll grow out of it or realise she isn't being sideline. HV said to just try reassure her and not tell her off but to explain situations however that would usually be our tactic with things.

    MJC Lorelei has been acting up a little too with the ole tantrums but just put that down to terrible twos lol Not any worse than they were thankfully as can be enough as they are. Sometimes all can do not to laugh when she;s lying on floor of Sainsburys shouting "Lorelei's princess" when I won't buy her a toy/book/toy :lol:

    I've been good, well for me, and am healing up well- dying to get onto my treadmill and back prancing about to my Davina dvd so trying to be good so can heal quicker and get going! Even felt well enough to take Niamh out in baby bjorn yesterday and although was quicker than the pram to get up the town, I was stopped a lot more haha
  • Hi!

    So far so good here though Wilf's only 21months and he's been around babies at nursery so we've been really lucky. Every morning once he's dressed he goes looking for 'baby' as he calls her. Gives her a kiss goodnight and spends most of the day trying to stroke her hair! He can play up while I'm feeding her but I expected that especially as we're heading towards the terrible twos and I'm just sitting him in his room each time he does something naughty to try and nip it in the bud as much as possible.
  • I could have wrote this when ds was born, just before xmas was in hospital constantly with server iron, b12 and folate defitancy so dd (whos 19 months) was staying with my parents ALOT after xmas things didnt improve then had little dude on new yrs day so dd got very unseetled (was very loving towards ds) she wld go to bed great but wake up around 11ish and thats it was stuck either in her bed (toddler size not comfy) or on sofa (mayaswell be toddler bed lol)

    We took a couple of nights controlled crying and she is now back to sleeping through most nights (occassionally we get the odd night she wants a cuddle all night) which im not to bothered about.

    Its so hard as u try ur hardest to make sure ur not making them feel pushed out, and inorder to that we always have an activity time in morning together, (painting, playdoe, baking) then and diffrent activity in afternoon, i have also taken to an afternoon nap where i settle ds for his sleep and then me and dd cuddle in my bed and have a snooze, (LAZY aint I :lol: )

    Just keep at what ur doing and she will soon settle back dwn.

    Sarah xx
  • Hey!

    I'm finding it hard with Bobby at the moment. He'll be 3 in July and we have well and truly hit the "terrible two's"!

    He has always been a really good sleeper but now he takes 2 - 3 hours to settle and keeps getting up saying he needs a wee or wants a cuddle.

    He is also throwing lots more tantrums and being really cheeky (bordering on rude) to me and Steve and the rest of the fsmily! We are using the "naughty step" and taking toys away from him if he really plays up but it is hard because he can be so good sometimes and he is so lovng towards Charlie.

    It's hard to think it's jealousy because he is always giving Charlie his toys to play with and asking to give him a cuddle. Then again, who knows what goes on in a 2 year olds head eh?

    As the song goes.... "things can only get better!"
  • Bobby is just like Lorelei by sound of your post. I was saying to dude earlier it feels like I spend the day telling Lorelei off! Well, I usually explain or try distracting her etc rather than straight out telling off but often she'll ignore me or answer back. So hard to think they're only 2 - good practise for the teenage years I guess lol
  • I must say I am not finding it just as hard as I thought it was going to b!

    The only time in day I really hate is when feeding zander as heidi knows now I will b sitting for while feeding so just has a hour of touch pulling everything out n thinks it's so funny (she is only 14months)

    for me it will prob get little harder when zander gets little older but hay it's all part of the fun or so I keep telling myself!

  • hey firstimehiedi

    im the same the feeding bit is the hardest bit ive got a 22 month old and he gets into things while im bf Emily and all i can do it say NO.... lucky most of living room is baby proof! and i hate having a double pram!!! but apart from that its not to bad!

    we moved the same week as emily was born and then my son Micah got his new toddler bed 2 so its been crazy!! oh and then i got mastitis to to top it all off!! painfull!!

  • haha well, Xander my 23 month old has turned into a right little terror, hit the terrible twos full throttle - but bless, I think he is just jealous of her and the fact that mummy/daddy don't always have as much time for him.

    he does give her cuddles though which is nice but he has started throwing his toys etc, I am a little worried of him hurting her one time.
  • im the same as heidi i also have a 14 month and i have to say he's not a problem, he'll sit on the floor 'reading' his books while ive got aimee its my 4yr old thats playing up, she's being rude, storms off, is really naughty, we have allowed for the fact that had harrys bday, then xmas, then aimee, then it was her bday so she got really spoilt but there is only so much naughtiness we're willing to let pass, its very hard to know when to draw the line really, she's at nursery 3 days aweek so that helps im just dreading sep when she starts school ekkk hehe

  • It seems we are all having a few issues with our older ones. Josh is 3 1/2 and is at nursery 3 mornings a week. The main problem we have with him is the rudeness, answering back and not listening. It's a real struggle when I sit down to feed Rebekah, because he always wants something. Even if I ask him before, he can always think of something else. It's the rudeness that I find hardest, he constantly does the opposite to what I ask and is so rude to me and other people.

    We'll all look back on this in a few months and laugh! (I hope!) X
  • that's exactly the same as isabelle, she's only just turned 4 last month and i hate the back chatting and the rudeness, i keep saying she's a mini teenager!, and she now will only go for a poo in a nappy, where as she was going in the toilet, its only poo tho she's weeing fine in the toilet, and i have to put a nappy on cos she refuses to go otherwise and then gets a tummy ache, i'm really not sure how to stop her doing it :?

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