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Just had my scan...

...and we are team pink once again!



I was actually quite shocked as I'd finally got my head around having a boy and didn't quite believe the sonographer at first as she seemed to struggle to see either way but I asked her how certain she was and she said 98% "in that I can't see boy bits which are normally easy to spot and what i can see looks like girl bits"! Not the most scientific response.



I am feeling slightly mixed feelings as DH is gutted that his final chance of having a son is out the window so I feel bad for him but apart from that I'm thrilled!

Replies

  • How's OH with it now? x
  • no it's number 3 Crumpets! and defnitely the last!!



    Kimmy - he's still coming to terms with it. It's upsetting me a bit as quite a few people have said "oh no what a disappointment" or "sorry it's not a boy" and actually for me it really isn't a dissappointment at all as I wanted a girl, other than for the fact of DH having the son he wanted but I can't say that if DH is anywhere in earshot as he is so disappointed. He made a comment (half joking - i hope!) about yesterday being one of the worst days of his life which really saddened me as after all we've found out that we have a healthy baby in there and when I had a little moment when excpecting DD1 that the sonographer had got the sex wrong and she was a boy, he got quite shirty with me about the fact that all that matters is a healthy baby. He also said that, the way he felt yesterday he wished we'd not tried for a 3rd baby image



    I know it's just the shock as he was completely and totally convinced we were going to have a boy this time and that I have to give him at least a few days to get excited about our baby again but it is hard not to push the issue.



    I feel in limbo as I want to be excited and shouting it from the rooftops but I can't. Even DD1 seems dissapointed that it's another sister and not a brother and my MIL was as desperate as DH for a boy and I think my family all wanted one too as it's all girls on my side for 2 generations, so it's just me that is happy about our new littel princess image
  • I feel gutted for you, not because you are having a girl but because of other people's reactions. You are having a healthy baby and that is the most important thing! My cousin was told that her baby was a girl at her 20 week and 3D scan but had a little boy. I was shocked by the amount of people who said 'oh what a shame!' How could the birth of a healthy baby be a shame? Hope your oh cheers up a bit soon xx
  • Oh that's so sad, it's such a shame that this is something everyone should feel happy and excited about but they aren't. And how gutting for you that they feel that way. I really hope OH was joking with his comment about it being the worst day of his life- I think I would tell my OH to leave and not come back until he grew up if he came out with something so hurtful!



    I have people saying to me, oh it's good that you are having a boy (because I already have a girl). Well actually, I didn't care what it was, it isn't important to me to have one of each at all. And I wonder if it had have been a girl would they have been commiserating over a disappointment that actually I didn't feel at all?



    I'm sure you know that by the time she comes along everyone is going to love her more than anything and they wouldn't be able to imagine having a boy, but right now it's not that helpful, I guess it will take some time. I hope OH isn't making out that it is your fault at all, as we ALL know it is totally his!



    Lots of love xx
  • I've got my scan tomorrow and am also secretly hoping for a boy for DH's sake. We already have a DD and he says he doesn't mind but I know how much it would mean to him to have a son. I know how I would feel if i had 2 boys and never had a daughter. We've decided that we will only have 2 children.

    I hope your hubby comes around...after all each child is a blessing.

    Will let you know the outcome of our scan tomorrow ladies xx
  • Sorry I am gatecrashing but just had to comment as this post has made me sad and really feel for you. I hope your husband gets his head around having another little princess and takes back his words so that you can be excited together! Congratulations on having another girl! x x
  • Sorry I'm completely GC too but this topic has become a bit of a sensitive one for me and was not even something I had considered when we tried for our second.. I wanted a baby!!!



    We have a beautiful DD who we adores and were both thrilled to find out we were expecting again but to be faced almost immediatly with "you must want a boy...". What kind of statement is that!!!! I admitted to my husband that I actually wanted another girl as in my head I'm a girl and I understand girls.



    I couldn't take the stress of it in the end and had a private gender scan at 16 so stop all the guessing. We found out we were team blue and it really threw me. We were obviously chuffed we had this happy bouncy bean but I was a little shocked at being blue. To add to this people then told us things like "you have the set" and "aren't you the perfect family" which I took major offence to and entered into numerous arguements as why would we have been a less perfect family if we were team pink!!!!



    I don't know why people think they have any right to discuss the sex of your child with such an opinion. What is a perfect family is determind by the love and devotion of everyone involved regardless of what bloody sex they are!!!



    Please challenge anyone, even you husband for making you feel like you've done something wrong making a healthy baby. Maybe it will make them realise how ridiculous this whole gender preference business is!!!!



    Sorry for the massive rant.. I'm sure its probably pretty obvious "sensitive subject"!!! image
  • Hey hun, firstly congrats on your little pink bump, but also just glad to hear that baby is ok after what you have been going through the last couple of weeks.



    People dont think when they open their mouths sometimes, when the little one arrives everyone will just be happy that the baby is safely here, I know your oh is a bit dissapointed that it isnt a son but that doesnt mean he will love the baby any less, its like you really wanted another girl and had it been a boy you would have been fine just glad that baby is healthy, but just taken a few weeks to get your head around!



    sending hugs



    Luc x
  • Thanks for your comments everyone. Things are a lot better with DH now that he's had a couple of days to adjust. We had a good chat yesterday evening and he said that it wasn't so much the thought of another girl but the fact that he always thought he would have a son one day and now it's confirmation that he won't. And I understand that, I've never imagined myself with a son a all, only daughters and I had been really psyching myself up for the prospect of a boy purely because of that as the reality is all that ever matters is to be blessed with a healthy baby. So I understand his feeling of loss for what will now never be. I think he is already starting to feel excited again about our third princess (although he is praying at least one of them is a bit of a tomboy and not the complete girly squirmy DD1 is! DD2 is quite boisterous and loves cars and balls ATM so his hopes are on her but she came downstairs this afternoon in her big sister's sleeping beauty dress and DH was gutted!!) and we even had a really lengthy discussion about names yesterday which has made everything so much more real.



    Other people are still annoying me. I don't mind the jokes about "poor" DH being outnumbered as to be fair he is! But the "sorry it's not a boy" (that was from my mum) is just quite insulting. Almost as bad as the friend who said we were "abnormal" to be of our generation and actively planned for a third baby full stop!!!! And I think there are a lot of people who only see the point of a third, when you have two of the same sex already, to be to have one of the other sex or keep going til you "do a Beckham" - you wouldn't believe how many people have asked if we're now planning a 4th. Grrrr.



    Anyway I am ranting now and slightly off topic but I'm glad you all understand how I've been feeling. I don't know what I'd do at times without this forum to vent into!!
  • glad things have settled down and sounds like dh just needed time to absorb it all. x
  • I'm really glad things are settling down for you. Other peopl can make some really stupid comments, and I think all you can do is smile and ignore!



    My mum and dad had three girls then a boy, and alot of people assume they were trying for my brother, which wasn't the case at all. My mum got pregnant on the coil!



    I have an idea re DH being outnumbered- could you get a male pet of some sort? But be sure it is male first (have you read the Marian Keyes Walsh family books? They have 5 daughters, and they had got a cat that was apparently male, but turned out not to be)



    So what name ideas did you come up with? What names do you have already? x
  • Oh dear people and voicing their opinions! i never get why they think its appropriate to say it outloud to you. Congrats on a pink bump image x
  • I have an idea re DH being outnumbered- could you get a male pet of some sort? But be sure it is male first (have you read the Marian Keyes Walsh family books? They have 5 daughters, and they had got a cat that was apparently male, but turned out not to be)



    So what name ideas did you come up with? What names do you have already? x



    He's already outnumbered on that front too as we have a female dog and a female cat lol!!! And we definitely aren't getting any more pets (no matter how much DD1 pesters for a Guinea Pig!)



    Name wise, we've narrowed it down to Charlotte, Georgia, Sophia, Ella, Isobella, Mia, and Millie. So more of a longlist than a shortlist!!



    PS - i love Marian Keyes' Walsh sisters books image
  • Did you hear she has written the Helen one? Due out in the autumn! x
  • No! A last!! Can't wait for that one to come out!!
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