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need to vent, not baby related
Hi girls
Well as title says it's not baby related its robbie's dad related.
As you girls always seem to give me such good advice, i have come back for more lol
Story goes, Robbies dad is a ex druggie and complete a**e hole, but at xmas he was supposed to come visit robbie in london, he didnt show, but prior to this on xmas day i decided to give him benefit of the doubt, that god forbid he may of changed, and let robbie call him. On this phone call he promised robbie that he would see him monday 29th and give him presents, ok after which i took phone and said what time and station are you wanting us to meet you at, this would have been first time he met ray as well, his request to "stuss him out and make sure he was a good father figure" bloody cheek of the man.
Anyway back to story he replied to my question with, erm well i havent actually booked the ticket, argh omg he promised robbie and then that, so i said well text me the time as he assured me he had cash and was going to book it, his words, "nothing will keep me from seeing my son" yeah right.
So i told him text or call me and tell me time, i texted on 28th to get time, no reply, sod was i callling him, 29th texted tried ringing no reply.
I thought oh well his gf must be having baby early due on 4th, so i thought i should get a reply saying sorry or a phone call soon.
30 i texted, 1st i texted no reply 6th i text still no reply, today on the 12th he text saying tell robbie he has a brother, its name, weighht and sorry and he misses him and he had no money, argh the f***in tw*t i asked him if he had money he told me he did, why did he promise robbie knowing he couldnt keep it, he told me in november he was bookin ticket, i swear honest so i sent back, no i dont think robbie needs to know about a baby, and a text email or call wouldnt have hurt you and i told him well done another promise broken and i told robbie i didnt know when you were bringing presents and seeing him and to be honest he havent asked since, serves him right
Robbie has enough to deal with, with tests and behavioural stuff, without some stupid a hole, saying well im sorry but i have a new baby, your brother you will probably never see.
The bloke a complete joke, i thought he had od'd when i havent heard from him, sorry but the bloke has stolen, hit and mentally abused me for so long and now he is affecting robbie argh
Any advice, tell me your honest opinions, am i wrong to keep the brother thing from robbie, i just dont want to confuse him anymore than he is, he think rays is his real daddy now and richy is a daddy richy who lets him down x
I am thinking of applying for sole custody, should i bother or not as he lives with me and the things i have noted and solicitor has from past experiences, means he would never get custody x
Well as title says it's not baby related its robbie's dad related.
As you girls always seem to give me such good advice, i have come back for more lol
Story goes, Robbies dad is a ex druggie and complete a**e hole, but at xmas he was supposed to come visit robbie in london, he didnt show, but prior to this on xmas day i decided to give him benefit of the doubt, that god forbid he may of changed, and let robbie call him. On this phone call he promised robbie that he would see him monday 29th and give him presents, ok after which i took phone and said what time and station are you wanting us to meet you at, this would have been first time he met ray as well, his request to "stuss him out and make sure he was a good father figure" bloody cheek of the man.
Anyway back to story he replied to my question with, erm well i havent actually booked the ticket, argh omg he promised robbie and then that, so i said well text me the time as he assured me he had cash and was going to book it, his words, "nothing will keep me from seeing my son" yeah right.
So i told him text or call me and tell me time, i texted on 28th to get time, no reply, sod was i callling him, 29th texted tried ringing no reply.
I thought oh well his gf must be having baby early due on 4th, so i thought i should get a reply saying sorry or a phone call soon.
30 i texted, 1st i texted no reply 6th i text still no reply, today on the 12th he text saying tell robbie he has a brother, its name, weighht and sorry and he misses him and he had no money, argh the f***in tw*t i asked him if he had money he told me he did, why did he promise robbie knowing he couldnt keep it, he told me in november he was bookin ticket, i swear honest so i sent back, no i dont think robbie needs to know about a baby, and a text email or call wouldnt have hurt you and i told him well done another promise broken and i told robbie i didnt know when you were bringing presents and seeing him and to be honest he havent asked since, serves him right
Robbie has enough to deal with, with tests and behavioural stuff, without some stupid a hole, saying well im sorry but i have a new baby, your brother you will probably never see.
The bloke a complete joke, i thought he had od'd when i havent heard from him, sorry but the bloke has stolen, hit and mentally abused me for so long and now he is affecting robbie argh
Any advice, tell me your honest opinions, am i wrong to keep the brother thing from robbie, i just dont want to confuse him anymore than he is, he think rays is his real daddy now and richy is a daddy richy who lets him down x
I am thinking of applying for sole custody, should i bother or not as he lives with me and the things i have noted and solicitor has from past experiences, means he would never get custody x
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Replies
I think that you Ray, Robbie & Caitlin should get on with your lives as best you can. If Robbies dad does contact him then you need to explain to Robbie that unfortunatly sometimes people don't always keep the promises that they make and that its not his fault.
Maybe trying explaining that to him now and try to prepare him for being let down. Although we want to protect our kids from everything sometimes we can't but kids are good at just getting on with things.
Maybe next time Rich "wants" to see Robbie he should make the arrangements with you and don't tell Robbie, that way if he does turn up then it will be a big nice supprise for him. and if he is a no show like normal then at least Robbie will be non the wiser.
As for the new brother I would tell him but try not to make a big deal of it, and just reassure Robbie if needed that you & Ray loves him loads - which I am pretty sure he knows already!!!!
Believe me in time Robbie will make up his own mind about his Dad and see him for the person he really is - and remember that it is no ones loss apart from Rich's!!!!
Big hugs to you all xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
I can relate to your situation but it was Sams MUM that was the heroin addict and left him. She is now pregnant again( richs mum bumped into her in town) and has 2 in care and hasn't bothered with Sam in the last 2 years.
Rich decided to stop all contact when it had been 3 months that she hadn't seen Sam as he said it was unfair on Sam as she kept arranging to meet and didn't turn up.
It was tough at first but in the end Rich was honest with Sam and told him his Mum was nasty to his daddy and was too busy to see him. It sounds awful that we said that to Sam but it was the best thing we did as it cleared the air straight away and Sam hardly mentions his mum anymore and his behaviour changed sooo dramatically for the better once all contact stopped.
Am always here if you need a shoulder hun. x x x
At the end of the day its not as if he is gonna bump into them or anything. By the way all kids just want the presents, even us 28 year olds, lol.
Big hugs xxxxxxxxxxxxx