Clingy - is it just a phase?

daves_friend · Jun 18, 2010 7:15PM

Evening ladies

Please tell me this is just a phase because Freddie is awfully clingy at the moment. He's absolutely fine with his daddy during the day but at night if he's unsettled he gets worse if OH goes to him and only calms again when I'm holding him. He cried the other day at a friends house because I nipped to the loo - he's been there loads of times and is usually fine with her. Today went to watch my godson's swimming lesson and his mum was holding freddie - i was sat next to them and he went into meltdown til I had him back again!

I'm panicking because he's due to start nursery at the beginning of August and just now the thought of it is sooo traumatic. Is it just Freddie or are other Nov babies doing this?

Thanks

Welsh xx

sarah_jane77 · Jun 17, 2010 2:37PM

Hi Welsh

Ty can get like this, especially with MIL which is sooooo embarassing. So I just say he's tired all the time, even though he's not. It depends what mood he's in. Although with my mum and dad you would think i wasn't there !!!
I'm abit worried about it as he starts his nursery taster sessions on Tuesday, they just want me to drop him in, stay for 5 mins and then leave, even on the first one..... Am dreading it.

Apparently separation anxiety is something which can start from 6 months and does eventually disappear.

Hope so anyway..

Sarah

Dylansmummy-17577 · Jun 17, 2010 4:55PM

Mainly when he is tired! Our bond is stronger than its ever been and he mainly wants mummy when he's tired. Takes daddy twice as long to settle him for naps and he will mess on his bottles with him too (although both getting better) and if people he doesn't know as well try to hold him when he's tired meltdown occurs! Which is weird as he rarely cries otherwise, so it always shocks me!

I think it just proves our babies just really love their mummies at the minute. Plus I wouldn't be too concerned about nursery I think the other babies may help with the distraction.

Big hugs xxx

mummabear-72331 · Jun 17, 2010 7:51PM

It is a phase starting now up til about 9 months. Great!! As Sarah says, separation anxiety. Brody had started it and its really escalated in the past 2 weeks. I cant go to the loo - even with the door open - without him going off. He just screamed because our cat walked away from him and went outside. Last night hubby came in and kissed him then walked away to get undressed and he lost it. So yet another thing Ive been looking into as its been driving me mental and I thought it was cos I wasnt picking him up enough. But it just a phase and Im told to deal with it by getting down on his level and being with him to reassure him Im there, then distracting him (with a toy or activity). Also, to just tell them you are leaving and coming back and to keep talking to them from where you are when they cant see you. After a few days that now seems to be working although he still has his moments and Im guessing will continue to for the next few months!

I think I read somewhere about having to go off to work at this stage and its a good idea to start practicing saying goodbye at the door (waving etc). Freddie may get upset when you leave him at nursery but once he is distracted Im sure he will be fine hon. Im sure the staff are well experienced with it and it wont be as big an issue as you fear it will be.
x

mummabear-72331 · Jun 17, 2010 7:54PM

here are some tips:

http://www.babywhispererforums.com/index.php?topic=84719.0

Ems101 · Jun 18, 2010 4:32AM

Jen does get like this, but I find if she is with someone who can contain her anxiety (daddy/granny) can say something like 'yes there's mummy, she's doing the washing up' and then distract her, she's ok. Definatly worse at night, she can scream blue murder with her daddy and then the instant she is with me, she is a little lamb!

Em x

evab1 · Jun 18, 2010 2:53PM

Definitely a stage, but an awful one. Zach only wants me all the time. I try to discourage this but seems ot be lasting a while

It's a shame for his Daddy. Altho he is more interested in the footy at the minute anyway and has no time for the rest of us non footy people

x

XXmummy-of-3XX · Jun 18, 2010 3:13PM

I think Lily has been clingy since day one- she won't even let anyone else feed her. I went to the dentist and left her with my Mum, she screamed for an hour- refused milk and food. She ate it cold when I got back. She will let Daddy cuddle her, but she's not happy unless she can hear and see me! Good job I'm not planning on going to work. xx

daves_friend · Jun 18, 2010 4:01PM

Thanks ladies, feel a bit better about it knowing it's not just us! Was aware of separation anxiety but hadn't reckoned on it happening for a few months yet. Today's been a little better, he happily spent over 2 hours with his daddy this morning and had a good sleep for him too. This afternoon we've been to the park with my friend and her little girl and Freddie was so transfixed with Sophie I'm not sure he even realised I wasn't holding him so I'm sure distraction will be key to improving things. Am hoping there'll be a pretty little girl at nursery to take his mind off things ;\)

Sarah, I can't believe they're suggesting you only stay 5 mins at Tyler's first taster session! Freddie and I are due to go for a couple of full morning sessions to break him in gently - please let us know how you get on

xx

Rosapenny · Jun 18, 2010 7:15PM

Olivia can get like this especially if it is just us two in the house, if I leave the room she screams bloody murder! I hope it is isnt going to be too bad though because I go back to work in 2 weeks time and my mum is going to take care of her.

Clingy - is it just a phase?

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