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Stop the world I want to get off!!! - PND????
Hi - I really could do with some advice before I phone my health visitor tomorrow.
I had a very traumatic birth in April & have had anxiety problems & panic attacks which generally are getting better. I haven't felt "depressed" until about 3 weeks ago when I had a really bad few days, 2 feeling quite low then one where I was feeling complete despair & couldn't stop crying etc the following day I felt a bit brighter then have been ok until Thursday just gone, I started feeling panicky & low again & very anxious but for no apparent reason, the same Friday & then yesterday I couldn't get out of bed, I didn't want to do anything, I felt I couldn't cope & that I was going mad, it was TERRIBLE, I had to get my husband to phone in sick as I couldn't bear the thought of him going to work & leaving me, I hardly slept last night as my mind was racing going over & over the birth & other problems before the birth, didn't want to get out of bed again today until this afternoon when I started feeling a little brighter again & now I feel almost back to normal! I know if I feel ok in the morning I won't bother making that phone call as I'll feel I'm wasting her time but it scares me that this could happen again, could this be PND? It seems strange to me that I can be ok for a couple of weeks or so then feel like I'm crashing & hit rock bottom then start picking up again! I would have thought it would be continuous if it was depression - any advice would be great thank you.
Ann-Marie
I had a very traumatic birth in April & have had anxiety problems & panic attacks which generally are getting better. I haven't felt "depressed" until about 3 weeks ago when I had a really bad few days, 2 feeling quite low then one where I was feeling complete despair & couldn't stop crying etc the following day I felt a bit brighter then have been ok until Thursday just gone, I started feeling panicky & low again & very anxious but for no apparent reason, the same Friday & then yesterday I couldn't get out of bed, I didn't want to do anything, I felt I couldn't cope & that I was going mad, it was TERRIBLE, I had to get my husband to phone in sick as I couldn't bear the thought of him going to work & leaving me, I hardly slept last night as my mind was racing going over & over the birth & other problems before the birth, didn't want to get out of bed again today until this afternoon when I started feeling a little brighter again & now I feel almost back to normal! I know if I feel ok in the morning I won't bother making that phone call as I'll feel I'm wasting her time but it scares me that this could happen again, could this be PND? It seems strange to me that I can be ok for a couple of weeks or so then feel like I'm crashing & hit rock bottom then start picking up again! I would have thought it would be continuous if it was depression - any advice would be great thank you.
Ann-Marie
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Replies
Sorry to hear your having a bit of a bad time recently make the phone call and your not wasting her time its her job and she will be there to listen once you have spoken to someone about your feeling it will be like a weight being lifted off your shoulders
Take care sorry I dont have much advice for you hope you feel better soon x x x x
depression shows itself in so many ways. But please please make the phone call - you will just make things worse otherwise. I had pnd and getting that help was the best thing i ever did.
you wont feel like this forever, not long at all infact if you get help. It is just a blip, hormones, anxety, post-traumatic stress, all these things combined would drive anyone to the edge!
let us know how you get on once youve made the call - and try to be honest with the hv, dnt try to make light of it even if your feeling better at the time - tell her exactly what youve written in your post.
all the best xx
hope you have phoned the hv, we are all here too if you want to chat x.
I phoned my HV & she was round within the hour, I talked non stop for an hour & a half about everything, all the times during my pregnancy I'd felt let down by my midwife & my Dr and then the hospital after the birth and when she said the words "you've been completely let down by the whole system" I felt a sense of relief, anger & sadness that most of what I'm going through now could have been prevented if I'd have been looked after properly. She's made me an appointment with another Dr tomorrow to sort out some meds & is coming back to see me Wed & Thur. I feel totally emotionally exhausted and just want to get better, she said it can take up to 3 weeks for the meds to start working & they could make me feel a bit more anxious to start with which worries me but I suppose I will get there eventually, nothings going to bring back the last few months I feel I've missed out on being the mum I know I could have been though & that makes me very sad. Thanks again for listening xxx
I suffered pnd and I can totally empathise with you. All these feelings come to you and you can't understand why- thats the hardest part you want a rational explanation for why you feel this way but unfortunately there isn't one.
As far as meds are concerned they will take 3-4 weeks to take effect but whatever you do don't stop taking them just coz you feel ok- this is what I did- a few times actually before I finally realised this wasn't going to work.
Think of it like an antibiotic- if you don't finish the course of meds the illness is highly likely to return smae with anti depressants. You will probably be put on an initial couse of six months take these then go back to doc for another assesment.
All the best xx
also, the first few weeks/months with a new baby are hard at the best of times, don't worry about l/o x.