read me
Hi ladies, just want to share something with you all -
Something I'm having a lot of trouble admitting, I'm not sure if anyone else feels this way.
Sometimes I can't be bothered to play with my baby. Some days I just can't "engage" with him or entertain him and if he cries, I get impatient. And I think "I'm such a terrible mum!!!" I do get depressed, usually for no apparent reason but sometimes I think about all the things LO hasn't got. Nothing major, he has food, warmth etc, but just silly things. Other mums talk about their baby bouncers and mats and special equipment and I start to feel not good enough and guilty. Which simply compounds the depression...
I say stop comparing yourself to other mums. I'm sure every mum has their own problems and concerns. There is no such thing as the perfect mum. And if there was, I sure wouldn't want to know her! :roll:
Something I'm having a lot of trouble admitting, I'm not sure if anyone else feels this way.
Sometimes I can't be bothered to play with my baby. Some days I just can't "engage" with him or entertain him and if he cries, I get impatient. And I think "I'm such a terrible mum!!!" I do get depressed, usually for no apparent reason but sometimes I think about all the things LO hasn't got. Nothing major, he has food, warmth etc, but just silly things. Other mums talk about their baby bouncers and mats and special equipment and I start to feel not good enough and guilty. Which simply compounds the depression...
I say stop comparing yourself to other mums. I'm sure every mum has their own problems and concerns. There is no such thing as the perfect mum. And if there was, I sure wouldn't want to know her! :roll:
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Replies
I have a couple of programmes I watch faithfully every day but I also make sure to spend a bit of time playing with lo each day. Do try to allow lo to play on his own at times too though so that he doesn't become too clingy to you.
I know what you mean about comparing yourself to other mums- I do this far too much and for me I think its just to do with a lack of self confidence. Money and fancy toys don't make a child happy- infact I think if you keep it basic they tend to appreciate more.
My 6 and 4 yo love nothing more than a bottle of bubbles (49p!) , a trip to the forest with wellies on to splash in the streams or digging in my back garden for worms and beetles!
Don't compare yourself to other ppl and try not to worry.
"i'd love to be a perfect mum but i'm too busy raising my kids"
=D
I see perfect mums in M&S cafe for their coffee mornings each day at 11am. Its wrong I know but a little bit of me hates them just for looking so perfect. Yummy Mummys, eating Organic drinking their herbal teas. I think really I may be a bit jealous that they have such a group of other mums around them but at the same time I dont want to be like them.
That said I could also have completely the wrong idea and they may all be walking disasters like me, just better at faking it.
I always compare myself to other mums, but instead of thinking "I do that better than them, or my baby is looking happier" or whatever, I always look at what they're doing better than me, or think they're babies are happier and healthier.
Why do we set ourselves up to be disappointed and depressed? Since I stopped trying to compare myself to other mums, and just enjoy my baby for what he is, I've been so much happier! And the result of that is that Max is a lot happier!
Its a great relief to stop worrying about how other mums are doing better than you. If you love your baby ( as I'm sure you all do) then thats all it takes to be a great mum! Not fancy toys or the latest clothes xxx )
caz x x
I found out, when my bro was talking, that she does in fact wake up every night, the food she eats are fish fingers and chips, pizza and chips, anything as long as she gets chips.
After finding this out i felt really good. My lo has been sleeping from 7 - 7 for the last week, eats fruit and veggies and has a balanced diet. I know my lo has plenty of toys and gadgets and stuff (what a waste of our money) she like nothing better than sitting with me watching in the night garden, reading a book or me and daddy taking her to the park.
THERE IS NO SUCH THING AS A PERFECT MUM.
The fact that your SIL was trying to give the impression of being a "perfect mother" shows that she has just the same insecurities as the rest of us. We all like to keep up this charade that motherhood is like a disney movie but it's simply not like that! I think it would be great if other mums felt they could be totally honest about their babies, even some of the "bad" things (like accidently cutting LO's finger with nail clippers - oops!!). I think it would make everyone feel better. And the fact that your LO doesn't sleep through, or simply refuses to eat carrots, doesn't make you a bad mum!!
I'm glad you feel better now. Its nice to find out people like that are human too! xxxxxxxxxxxx