Does anyone else feel like they are struggling????

Hi, I had my second baby in September, most days I feel ok but some days I feel under so much pressure and stressed out. My other child is 4 and I am still up with him during the night more so than with my 10 month old. I had really bad post natal depression with my first child, I didn't eat for the first 2 months and lost alot of weight however it reached its peak around his first birthday, I seeked help and got through it I was on anti depressants for a year. As it is coming nearer to my 2nd childs first Birthday I am starting to feel the same way and am becoming really worried about it, I am always tired and have been taking migranes, i feel really run down. Most days when I feel bad I wish the day away as I am so stressed I cant enjoy it, I have so much to do, but I dont want to look back and realise i didnt get to enjoy it as this is what happened with my first child. I try speaking to my friends who have children and ask them if they find it hard or feel stressed but they all look at me as if i am silly, they all seem to cope fine, I dont know why I cant, sometimes I urge them to say what I am saying so that I know its natural feelings but they dont, when I say it they look at me as if....really?? I look at other mums in the street who seem so happy and it makes me feel worse. I always wanted to be a mum but I just find it so difficult, my family and my husbands family dont live that near us so it is hard to get time out, my husband has a professional job also so he is very stressed and tired when he comes in. I am constantly snapping at him and resenting him for the way I feel. I know it is not his fault but I just wish I could cope. i am sick of the ups and downs, one minute i feel great and think i am being silly then the next minute i feel terrible. I cant understand why everyone else seems to manage it and I cant. Does anyone else feel this way??
I love my children and my husband so much and I have a really good life, no financial worries or anything like that. I just dont know why I find it soooo hard. If anyone has gone through this or is going through it i would be so happy to hear from you. Thanks for reading this.

[Modified by: Jo*cael* on 06 July 2010 16:04:00 ]