Has anyone done couples counselling?
Apologises if this is a little rambly
I don't post much on here anymore but I used to & in between my baby posts I used to rant a lot about my hubby. Well he seems to be getting under my skin even more (we've barely dtd since we had Isobelle & part of it is that I'm too angry with him to relax with him). During the day, yesterday, I'd caught my washing basket handle on the radiator & pulled half of it off & he decided to fix it at 1 this morning resulting in Isobelle waking up & taking me nearly 2 hours to get her to sleep in which time I had a chance to really get myself worked up.
Basically in my head I hold him responsible for ruining big things in our life by not thinking or by his incredibly poor time keeping. I won't go into detail but I feel that he proposed in a stupid way, didn't do the few things he was supposed to do for our wedding day (including arriving in the right city nearly 12 hours later than he was supposed to & getting to our wedding venue less than 45 mins before we were due to get married in his jeans having not showered or shaved yet (I saw him coming in from a loft window whilst my mum was lacing me into my dress).
I feel like I'm a single parent at times as I make all the parenting decisions & have to pack her pack even if we go out for a few hours as he only thinks of himself. If it wasn't for me she'd probably have no clothes or toys & would have be bathed as he's never done it without me saying that she needs 1. On a saturday morning i teach a drama group & when I return home at midday more often than not they've only just finished breakfast & she's still wearing what she slept in. I feel like I have to mother him in that he rarely does any washing or cooking & if he does the shopping (if I've got a lot of work on) I have to make him a list as he seem's incapable of thinking for himself. I have to get him up if we're going anywhere. He never wears a watch (I did buy him 1 for Christmas but he's never worn it) & he's always late for everything. He also doesn't let me know if he's gonna be late or that he says he's gonna do something but doesn't do it but if he'd have let me know I could've done it.
Sorry to rant I'm just really wound up. I've spoke to him about some of these issues - the time keeping & the fact that I feel I have to do everything for our daughter but nothing seems to change & I just feel things are getting worse. I really want to ttc for no 2 but I honestly don't see how I can bring another child into this as I know it'll mean me having to deal with everything (the idea of doing bedtime's with a toddler & newborn by myself worries me). I currently work 2 days a week but as a teacher I usually have to put in a lot of hours at home. Hubby works full time in London but started a new job that he promised would mean shorter hours & these seem to have got longer & longer.
It doesn't help that af is currently visiting or that his parents stayed on Tuesday for us to celebrate our 3rd wedding anniversary in London (they stressed me out beyond belief & we nearly missed the train - had to drive 2 stations further along to catch it - then he spent a lot of time playing on his phone rather than talking to me.
If you've got this far my question is this my problem? Is this something I need to work through. I'm sure I'm being unreasonable blaming him but I just can't seem to put things behind me & move on. My only experience of counselling is when my parents got divorced & it was awful (think 4 quiet children aged 9 -15 with a chain smoking woman who then told our parents different things to what we'd said).
I will talk to my hubby to