Bad midwife experience

Has anyone else had a bad experience with their midwife? Grrrr, I did today. I had my booking-in appointment with a lovely midwife but I've since changed doctors. A week or 2 ago I had my 16 week check but it was with my GP rather than midwife and she was really nice too, but this week I've had to go to the midwife (luckily I won't be having her throughout my pregnancy!!!) to get my blood pressure checked as it was really high at 16 wks. Thankfully it's back down to normal but I don't know why as I was absolutely raging!!!

First off, because I'm a new patient I just sat in the general waiting area, not knowing that (how silly is this) there's two benches that you're supposed to wait on for antenatal appointments. My appointment was meant to be at 2 but I was waiting till 2.40, I asked the receptionist how much longer it was going to be and she said, oh you're supposed to sit over there. So I went to sit on these seats (which were only about 2 metres from where I was sitting originally!) and the mw came out. She hadn't even bothered to walk round the waiting room or call out my name! She acted like it was my fault!!! Anyway I let her see her next patient cos otherwise it wouldn't have been fair on the other woman who had been waiting...but I was fuming! How much does it take to walk round a waiting room and look for me, or call my name? She knew I was a new patient!

So I eventually got to see her...and she was so rude, she answered her phone twice (obv wasn't urgent) and didn't even apologise to me or tell the woman she was speaking to that she was with a patient. And then she called her back, without so much as a word to me!!! While I'm just sitting there feeling stupid.

She wasn't nice at all and didn't apologise for the misunderstanding with the waiting rooms, she was really false and just horrible...I would have been dead pleased about the lower BP and hearing the babys heart but it just totally ruined it. She acted like she just wanted me out as soon as possible.

Also with my 20 week scan, when I said I wanted to keep the old appointment she said I COULD but basically implying it would be really annoying of me! So I said fine I'll have it at the local hospital (even though thats hard for my oh to get to) whatever and then she called me after the appointment to say actually have it at the other hospital cos we can't get you in!!!

Grrrr sorry I sound like a crazy lady but it really peed me off.

Philippa 17+3 x x x


  • I'm hopeless at complaining though - although judging by the essay I wrote there u wouldn't believe it! :lol: I was going to say something but I just sat there steam coming out of me instead lol,guess I can't moan unless I do somethin about it

    My hormones have been haywire too...I'm really angsty and irritable which isn't like me at all (cough) well not really anyway. Someone only has to block the TV and I'm 'get out of the ******* way!!!'
  • awww hun sorry to hear about your bad experience i've been having a bad time myself too!
    i had an appointment with the midwife last week, they have a separate waiting room to see the midwife and i was the only one waiting so i figured i wouldn't be in long. after waiting half an hour the other patient came out at which point i thought i'd be in soon. how wrong i was after another 25 mins i was called in to see the midwife who had a trainee with her.

    the trainee took my b/p which took 10 mins it felt like my arm was gonna drop off and then the midwife checked it again!!!!
    i was then told to hop up on the couch so she could feel my tummy and my midwife isn't exactly gentle (although she's really nice - so i'll let her off for that!) and then the trainee had a good ol' poke about! i was to say the least rather uncomfortable! the midwife said i was looking quite small for 37 weeks but not to worry sh'es arrange a scan just to make sure which she did while i was there and they rang me back later that day to confirm it!

    when i went for my appointment at the hospital for my "scan" i was sent to the scan area and told i was not booked in for one so had to go back to the main reception area and was told i was booked in to see a doctor! after waiting an hour and 15 mins i was taken to see the doctor who told me exactly the same as the mid wife did! she asked how i was so i told her i was really pissed off and she said it's normal to wait upto an hour!!!!!! i was gob smacked and now have to go back next week for a scan!! i was in there for 2 hours to be told that it's probably just because i'm only small myself and not to worry!!! grrrrrrrrr!

    sorry it's a bit long but thought i'd get my rant out of the way!


    [Modified by: babyboo1984 on November 23, 2007 04:39 PM]
  • oh my god your midwifes sound a lil on the horrible side, i got my first appointment on 12th dec n im dreadin it! i really hope i have a nice midwife tho! that puts me at ease, im dreadin it! image
  • bec - my midwife is really nice and really helpful infact i've had 2 as i moved half way through and they were both really nice it's just my current one doesn't seem to have the word 'gentle' in her vocabulary!
    i'm sure your mid wife will be great and don't forget everyone on here is here to help and give advice on anything!
    this has been my life line when i've been feeling down or was worried everyone on here are just fantastic!
    i've only got 2 weeks and 3 days left so now i'm a little on edge and can't seem to stop cleaning lol!

    oh and congratulations

  • i guess i'm one of the lucky ones my mid wife has the wise owl look about her and although she had a call whilst she was with me she apologised and tried to get teh lady (turned out to be a neighbour of mine could hear her voice lol) to end the call as she was a lil busy at the moment with me. She was a lil pooh pooh about a few things i mentioned worry wise but adviced me not to buy a doppler and that if i was really worried she'd use the doppler on me as she had her own. that reassured me. we have a call centre for problems where the midwife calls in to pick up messages regularly and after asking how many were on the team she told me 7 but only 3 were in the local area image again made life a lil easier as it means i won't see a different one each visit
  • It's a shame as before I changed doctors my mw was absolutely lovely and went through all my worries with me. But that one I had was horrible! Thank god she's not the 1 I'm having all the way through. My new mw called the other day and she sounded OK.

    Babyboo I know how u feel being poked. They poke u really hard dont they! I can't wait till I feel some movement then hopefully my baby will protest by kicking her lol...I think it is ridiculous with scans as well, I had 2 scans early on for bleeding, and I had next-day how come it is so hard to get a scan unless its an emergency?

    I have rung the hosp. in my old district and asked if I'm still booked in and if it's ok to come and they said yes. But if I turn up in 2 wks and they say 'Oh sorry, you changed doctors' I am going to throw a proper tantrum. They're also fussing because they haven't got my blood results and want me to chase them up. How hard can it be for one mw to ring another (I have the number) and ask for some blood results?!?!?!

    Also when I said I didn't want the down's test she looked at me like I was crazy! I'm 19 it's hardly likely. And if it is I wouldn't do anything about it so whats the point in stressing I might as well enjoy my pregnancy?

    Sorry, I seem to do nothing but rant on here! CrochetMom buy a doppler btw, they're the best! It is a bit frustrating at first but at about 15 weeks you start hearing it really soon instead of having to look for hours and its incredible x

  • Hi, sorry to hear you had a bad experience.
    My LO is now 21 weeks but thought i would share my experience.
    I never really had a regular midwife as seemed to be a different one every time i went to an appointment but in the main most were really nice. There was one really horrible one who gave me a row for moving my chair over a couple of inches when she was taking a blood sample as she said she had the chair arranged to where she liked it!!!! sooo sorry that at 36 weeks preg was trying to get comfy position!!
    The midwife i had at the birth was lovely tho and really helped me stay focused and calm and was not intrusive at all such a nice lady.
    Most midwifes deserve a medal and it is a shame some of them think that by being a bitch it is helpful!!
    Mind you, they told me they thought my baby was quite petite but was 8lb 15oz at birth so hate to think what their idea of a big baby would be. LOL!!!
    Good Luck. xx
  • (((hugs))) good job u haven't got her permantely, and your blood pressure was probably white coat syndrome because of her! anyway id complain hun you shouldn't ever be treated like that x
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