12 week scan - did anyone go alone?

I know this sounds a bit sad, but my DH is struggling to get the time off work to come with me, and I don't have any family where I live, and haven't told my friends I'm pregnant. So, I might be attending my scan alone. The hospital aren't being very helpful about letting me change times or dates, sadly.

Has anyone been alone for theirs? I'm not relishing it, to be honest. I can't think what I'd do if it was bad news, and I would so love my husband to see the baby with me if everything is okay.

But has anyone been alone? Was it all right? Or I am mad even considering it?


  • My dh came with me and to be honest I couldnt imagine him not being there, I would feel so guilty having seen my bean wriggling and kicking around knowing that he didnt. I feel guilty that i'm the only one to have heard the heartbeat on my doppler !!

    But if DH cant get the time off that isnt your fault, and there will be more scans in the future he can go to.

    Bless you Flush, I feel so sad for you being in this situation.


    Mrs W 13+6
  • awww im really sorry your hubby cant get the time to come with you my hubby was sent to london on the day of my scan, i was just lucky that my niece moved near to us earlier this year and got a car a few month ago so was able to take me to the scan.
    Could you aford to go privet with your hubby before your hospital scan date, then your hubby will be there the first time, youll know everything is alright, then you can do the hospital one on your own with the knowledge that all is well and your only going for you medical records to get filled out as they need to be done at the hospital scans not the privet ones x
  • My OH came with me for our 12 week scan, he wouldn't have not come!! If work had even suggesed it to him, they would have got a firm "I'm going" LOL!! I personally wouldn't go alone, but thats just me!! Surely if you book it in advance then your OH could get it as a holiday day? My OH gets 28 paid holiday days a year. Not including christmas and new years.

    Hope things work out for you.


  • He's a uni lecturer and doesn't decide his timetable, and contractually he can't take time off that isn't in the vacations.

    Its tricky. He's going to sort out a guest speaker, I think, so he can come. If not, the suggestion about going private is a great one, thank you.

    I got all teary thinking about it, and so he's going to do everything he can to be there. I just hate the thought of going alone, and am about five hundred miles away from my parents so its not feasible for them to come. I'm just not ready to tell the friends I have living near me about being pregnant yet, and really I only want OH there. It just feels so important.

    I should pull myself together - he's doing his best, and I know he'll sort it out if it is in any way possible.
  • PS just wanted to say as well, thank you for your support. x
  • Hello,
    I'm so sorry that your having these problems with your OH's work. Of course hospital doesn't help not being able to reschedual!! :evil:

    I think that if your OH cannot get there the a private scan may be your best option for you to share the experience-some do good deals.. especially if you only go for the 2d.

    I wanted reassure you though that going on your own is ok, It's a long story but at 17 I got pregnant with my 1st child and didn't actually have a scan until around 20 weeks. I had just been told I was pregnant and I was alone getting the bus to the hospital.

    I arrived and had the scan on my own. Due to the circumstances I was very upset however seeing the baby on the screen it didn't matter that I was alone. I just enjoyed seeing my baby.

    I hope you can get this sorted so your oh can join you!

    Lydia xx
  • oh Lydia - thank you!

    I think it is all going to be all right. My lovely husband has now promised he will be there and will find a way. Even if he has to pay someone to cover that lecture for him, he'll do it.

    I'm so relieved!
  • I have had all of my 12 week scans on my own (now on number 4). They dont do that much to be honest so he would much rather have the time off to go to the 20 week scans. Though he didnt make it to the last two 20 week scans either.
    He's just not that bothered about seeing it on the screen and I can sort of see why. From experience he knows it'll be here soon enough for all to see (and hear!) For us its more of a medical procedure to check things are all ok so he's happy to see the photos after they've done all of the important stuff. Plus, i was able to wind him up about the sex of our third baby cos i found out and he didnt want to know!

    It is a shame for your first baby but don't feel bad if you have to go alone. I'm sure the sonographer will make it a good experience for you either way. xx
  • I'm glad your hubby is going to sort something. I didn't want to reply before as being totally honest, it was the most magical thing I'd ever seen and I would have been devestated if hubby hadn't been there with me to see our bean (and mop up my tears!)

    Of course, you always get another chance at the 20 week scan but it's not the same as seeing it for the first time. I think my hubby has sometimes struggled to feel involved and needed during my pregnancy and I can imagine that not seeing the bean at the scan would have made this worse for him.

  • I'm so relieved to read your thread and see that your hubby has made the promise to go with you!
    Wouldn't have known what to say otherwise!!! (sorry!)

    It'll be an amazing experience and your hubby will be so so happy that he sorted things out to be with you


    P.S. If the guest speaker doesn't turn out, tell him to secretly give his students a free period!! LOL
  • Thanks ladies - I must be having an emotional day, as this has made me all teary!

    I'm so relieved that he's said he'll come. I don't think I'd made it clear to him how desperate I was to have him there. And he didn't realise he'd actually see the baby (although now I wonder exactly what he thought the scan would show...?) so didn't think it mattered that much.

    Phew all sorted. And I'll tell him if all else fails, he can play truant.
  • Hi Flush, a bit late, I know, but I just wanted to say you have all my sympathy. My husband is also a university lecturer and has had to get cover for his lectures to come to our 20 week scan (the 12-week one fell during the summer break, thankfully). Luckily, he has done so much cover for other lecturers in the past year that, now that it is his turn to call in favours, it doesn't look to be a problem. I'm so glad to hear your husband has sorted it out though, because we went through a period of wondering how we were going to be able to arrange things and it was really horrible! So, as I say, complete sympathy with your situation.

    Take care, and if you ever need a chat about the horrors of university bureaucracy, just drop me an e-mail!
  • Thanks History Girl! That has made me feel so much better.

    I think what frustrates him (and me) is that for probably 90% of the time, he can come and go as he pleases, within reason. But some things are set in stone, and can't be moved! He's the course leader for his course, and the only lecturer, so he finds it hard to get cover. And it was just typical that one of the immovable things is the same day as the scan!

    Thank you for the offer emailing to moan - I might well take you up on that! And please feel free to email me too.

    When are you due?
  • Ooh, how frustrating! At the moment, the only course my husband has that sort of responsibility for has precisely two students in it, so he can just ask them to switch dates (and then go through the oh-so-enjoyable process of trying to book a room!) Hope things get easier for you next term!

    I'm due on 2nd March - right in the middle of lectures. My husband is very pleased because he is planning on taking his full allowance of paternity leave and wants to take full advantage! image How about you?
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