I need some advice.

Im new here and i need advice.
I have just found out im pregnant, i already have a 2yo daughter. I basically ended up having a night of passion with my friend which has ended up with me becoming pregnant. I told him yesterday and is now telling me he says a abortion is the best thing as we dont even live in the same country and that our friendship is very rocky and that we cant seriously do this. Then he said he wil trust me again if i abort the baby. I dont know what to do, i dont want to have an abortion but i dont want to make things worse between me and my friend esp when i have feelings for him. He said if i keep the baby he will have no part in its life because of the relationship we have, i personally think thats a lame excuse. He said he will support the child but end of the day it wont have a dad.
This situation is breaking my heart and probably right now my worst nightmare. I mean is he likely to come around to the idea if i dont go through with an abortion.
Any advice would be greatful, thanks.


  • Hi guys thanks for your replies.

    tallkatie2 your not coming over harsh at all.

    Its just so complicated as the guy lives the other side of the world, and i live here in the uk lol. I just dont think i can abort a baby on a whim that he might speak to me again. I have morals he clearly doesnt.
    Your right, i should just ditch him. its just hard esp when you have feelings for that person. Guess he hasnt got any for me though image

    Why oh why didnt i realise that taking antibiotics on the pill wont protect me from getting pregnant.
  • You really dont sound like someone who could live with having an abortion. And if you did have one just to keep this so called 'friend' when you really didnt want one, then you would end up resenting him for making you go through it, and eventually hating him. So your relationship with him would be ruined anyway.

    At the end of the day its your decision. No one can tell you what to do as there is no right or wrong here. The only thing I can say for sure is that you need to think about what YOU want and what is right for YOU. Forget this guy for the time being and have a good long think about what you want to do. While you are deciding, cut all contact with him so that he cant blackmail you or put pressure on you. You are vulnerable at the moment and need to have space to think clearly.

    Personally I think he sounds like a total shit, and you would be better off just dumping him out of your life, no matter what you decide to do about the baby.

    Good luck, and remember we are here if you need to talk, rant or cry. x


  • Hi I have to agree with other peoples advice too. If he decides that this is worth ending your friendship over was he much of a friend anyway? And if he's trying to blackmail you into an abortion do you really need him in the baby's life? You dont sound at all sure about the abortion so I would wait before you talk to someone. If he wants to support the baby financially then thats great but plenty of people raise a baby alone without any financial support. I'm not saying you should, all I'm saying is its done. But ultimatley the only person who can make this decision and know its the right one is you. Good luck.
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