Worried - Will hubby be allowed in the room the whole time??

My Dad's girlfriend has just really worried me.

She has told me that when her daughter in law gave birth at the same hospital I am going to, that because she wasn't in established labour her husband was kicked out of the room.

Has anyone else experienced this? I am really worried as I just assumed hubby would be there through the whole labour, I really want him to be there, if I am going through that pain I am going to feel vulenrable and would want my hubby there for support

I have suffered in the past with agoraphobia and socialphobia, I am better now but I feel in this situation I wont cope alone!! :cry:


  • how long ago did she give birth?
    i think thats absolute rubbish as whether you are in established labour or not you will want bubby's support.
    especially as your having twins.
    if it really concerns you id call the hospital just to query it.
  • It was about a year ago.

    I am hoping that even if this is the case he will be allowed in as its twins and things will be a little different but it has really unsettled me.

    My ante natal classes start in september and we get a tour so hopefully I can ask this question first.

    I can understand if you are in the ward early for high blood pressue or something like that but surely as soon as the contractions start hubby should be there whatever time it is!
  • I dont honestly know as I wasnt in hospital long enough to find out... (got to hospital 9 and half cm), though I cant imagine they would be that mean! As Mrs JC said just ask! image btw, hospitals bend their rules if u make enough fuss!image
  • g/c it can haappen if for example you are only 2cms dilated they may ask your hubby to go home for a couple of hours and they will contact him when established labour starts, however this may vary from hospital to hospital and if this situation arises I would think/hope that if you explained to them your situation that they would be sympathetic to you and allow your hubby to stay xxx
  • hi, if ur only 2cm and progressing very slowly they maty say its ebst for OH to go home and rest ready for the big heave ho, but then, if ur not in established labour, most women aren't admitted and told to go home and come back later once contractions are closer together etc, so if ur not far along they may send u home too. but as ur having twins, the chances are the policies will be completely different, so best speak to ur mw/maternity unit about their policies for twin births and established labours and partners. xx
  • In my hospital it is that if you aren't in established labour you are not on the labour ward but on the antenatal ward. Your oh is allowed to be with you from 9 in the morning till 9 in the evening, but after that needs to leave. When you are kept on the labour ward however he is allowed to stay with you at all times.

    I was induced and was 2-3 cm dialated when they started and oh was allowed to stay with me. They explained in the beginning though that if they had to start with the pessary (sp) to get things going oh had to go home at the end of the day and would be called back when things where moving along.

  • Not sure wot hospital u r goin to but when i had my DS i was in labour for 36 hrs then em c-sec & my hubby was there the whole time really knackered but he was there

    i think u will b fine & if u want your hubby there just both demand it your body your say!!

  • Thanks for your responses ladies.

    Feeling a little less stressed about it this morning, will just have to make sure i stand up for myself if I feel i really need hubby there at the time xx
  • On our hosp tour they said they had a 'special delivery room' where multiple births are usually put, so I'd def ask on your tour, as you may get put somewhere like that for extra monitoring even before you're 4cm so hubby would then be able to stay
  • I agree with what Breighlin said. Most hosiptals have an antenatal ward for pregnant women who are not in "active" or "established" labour.
    When you arrive at the hospital you should be examined and if they determine that you are in early labour (basically less than 4cm) then they will usually send you home. If you cannot travel for any reason or they feel that you may be at high risk then you are likely to be admitted onto the antenatal ward. This ward has normal visting hours and your OH will not be able to stay with you after about 9pm. However if you are in this situation you will probably be given pain relief (eg pethidine) and encouraged to sleep - as will your OH. You will be on a ward with other women so it is important for all of you to try and get some rest.
    Once on the labour ward your OH will be able to stay with you all the time.

    I don't know what advice you might be given since you are having twins. In our area very few women have twins by vaginal delivery. If the babies need monitoring right from the start you may be put on the labour ward but because of the extra risk you may be adviced to stay on ante-natal rather than go home. You should talk to your midwife about your concerns.

    H xx
  • Yes it is true. It took me a long time to go into established labour but I was induced so had to stay in hospital. My OH was allowed to stay from 11am - 9pm so a good while, then he had to leave.

    My labour was so incredibly long that I actually wish he had not been there at all, he was so very bored!!!

    Next time I'm planning a VBAC as my labour ended in an emergency c-sec, and as I'm betting my labour will be long again, I'll only want my OH there when im in established labour.

    As you're having twins it will no doubt be different hon. All the staff were lovely when I had lo and made me feel at ease though it was very hard to sleep on a ward.
  • I met the consultant the other day and he said they have a special twin delivery room which is bigger than the other rooms as more people need to be in there.

    They will be putting me on a Syntocinon infusion drip from stage 1 and I will be having an epidural so i guess things will be moving quite quickly for me.

    Thanks for your messages girls, i feel more relaxed, if its just a case of him being kicked out as I will need to be resting etc. I guess I will be feeling OK so will be fine on my own, we only live 15 mins from the hospital so he wont be that far away either if he is sent home xx
  • They will only give you Syntocinon (and an epi) in a labour room - so from the moment that goes up - your DH will def be allowed to stay. image
  • Hi, blondefriend is right. if you're not in 'active' labour and are admitted to the labour ward OH will be sent home at the end of visiting hours but if on the labour ward all will be fine!

    Hope you're reassured after speaking to the consultant.
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