I feel awful, am I am bitch?

Am going to try and cut this story as short as possible. My mil lives 120 miles away and does nothing and I mean nothing. She already has 2 grandchildren who she has never really made an effort with and on the very rare occasion she visits (about once a year) she spends money as compensation for being a crap nanny. She is also one of the most annoying people I have ever met, as she does nothing she has nothing to talk about so repeats herself over and over. An hour in her company drives you insane. Well im now pregnant and my husband is the blue eyed boy....she now wants to come and visit us even though we have no space, she said she'll sleep on the floor!! My bil & sil will go crazy as she has never offered to visit them, she has always been pestered....but....I dont want her to stay....my hormones and mood swings will not cope and have told my husband no....he's just hung up on me in a snot. I feel awful and know I am a bitch but cant help it! Anyway why should we be treated any different.....plus it will cause arguements with my husband and his brother. Should I give in or stick to my guns. Sorry for rant but just dont know what to do xxxxx


  • i think you shoud stick to your guns its your home and if you dont hav a great relationship with eachother why on earth would she want to stay anyway? or is she oneof those people who is oblivious to others and their feelings, if so deffo keep your foot down its ur home, ur pregnant and tell hubby that he has to consider ur views.
    hope it all sorts out for u

    [Modified by: hollylizzy on November 13, 2007 11:36 AM]
  • I know its an awkward situation but I think you'd be better in the long run to stick to your guns coz if you find her hard to listen to when youre not pregnant it'll be at least 10 times harder when youre pregnant. Apart from anything else its not practical if you dont have the space. If she really insists on coming would she not book herself into a bed & breakfast & at least that way she wouldnt be under your feet 24 hours a day?

    Hilary x
  • Stick to your guns! if she's not offered to see the others why should yours be any different. its not like she can see the baby now! your pregnancy is just that YOUR pregnancy. She probably wants to come down and try and make sure you eat properly and look after the blue eyed boy's child. I wouldn't be able to stand her going over and over and orver what she has already said! i can't stand it if my OH does it occassionally i tell him i've heard that story before. Tell your oh that by having her stay with you that you'll be resorted to move out for the period she's here so that you do not get over stressed and jepordize the baby. that might make him think well yes i'd like to see my mom but maybe she could stay in a B&B or hotel for the night so as to relax the pressure on you. Maybe explain to her that you are unable to cope with the visit at the moment and that she'd be adding pressure on your relationship with your partner. Tell her yes you'd like her to visit but not right now let your hormones resettle after the birth or else you may say something you'll regret and that you would not like her to be offended. play to her knowing what it was like to be pregnant side of emotions lol lay it on thick so she rethinks coming down just to watch you with you head down the loo or having raging hormonal moments or sleeping lol image my avoidance of the MIL left me sat in the freezing cold for nearly and hour last night. Had told my OH that i didn't want her over as wanted to relax and warm up after the 45miins of stood outside walking home but still he invited the over and caused an arguement which involved me walking out before i permantly detached his head from his sholders lolunfortunately due to the emotions spent last night i am shattered today and stuggling to stay awake at work. (hence the long essay,its keeping me awake lol)
  • Oh God stick to your guns! My mil lives next door and i cant bloody stand her, she is the opposite to your mil and has 13 grandchildren and want to know everything and every detail of their lives wich is just so bloody annoying, i have to lock my door and pull the blinds all day long so she thinks im asleep or the baby is sleeping, im a prisioner in my own house!
    Tell you hubby that maybe in a few months when you feel more settleed with your pregnany that maybe she could book into a b&b nearby and visit for a while but that its unfair to expect you to entertain her at the moment and that its unfair to your hubbys siblings that you mil is making a differance in them. Good luck, if your mil is anything like mine your gonna need it! x
  • lol my mil lives a distance away but has made it perfectly clear that i should take the baby to see them EVERY weekend i basically told them to get notted! i rarely see my mom who lives the same distance away in the opposite direction from the MIL and my mom's my best mate! she's always ready to help and is very supportive the MIL on the other hand is a coniving manipulative and controlling person who i've watched for the last 2 years with her other GC and would hate my child to turn out like them! the 7yr old is spoilt obese and has anger issues. she even threatened to kill her lil sister if they were to sleep in the same room. she'll ionly listen to what my mil says and not her mom. now i'd rather kill my child than let it turn in to that! she's a lil monster!
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