My precious Mum has passed away.

I know I haven't got to know you ladies in the pregnancy forum very well yet, but just needed to talk about what has happened. I can't believe I'm actually writing these words, but my beautiful, brave Mum has passed away. She was diagnosed with cancer at the beginning of December, and has been in and out of hospital ever since, which is the reason I haven't had any spare time to be on here as much as I usually am. She had recently been re-admitted to hospital but was responding well to treatment and was due to be coming home very soon. Unfortunately she suffered from a massive brain haemorrhage and died peacefully with us all at her bedside.

She had been so brave throughout the whole of her journey. Even though I know at times she was very frightened, she still always managed to have a smile ready for us all. I just can't believe she has been taken so quickly, The consultant described her death as 'sudden & unexpected', which it most certainly was. I'm still pretty shellshocked and keep hoping that this is just a bad dream from which I will be able to wake up.

We held her funeral on thursday. The service was beautiful, and the sun shone for her. My brothers & my husband carried her coffin, and my sister and I managed to get through our readings in Church with only a little wobble at the end when we read out a poem for her. At the moment I'm just taking things one day at a time, as that is all I can bear to do. My faith is helping my through, and I'm sure I will find the strength to cope from somewhere. My Mum has been such an inspiration to me that I just don't want to let her down by falling apart now.

We have our first scan tommorrow, and to be honest I am absolutely terrified. We had a mmc back in September, and only found out at the 12-week scan that our baby had died at nine and a half weeks. I know there is a good chance that things will be ok this time, but I am finding it very hard to think positively at the moment. I keep having waves of sheer panic, this will be my first baby and I have no idea how I will cope without my precious Mum to guide me.

I hope everyone on here is doing ok, and am looking forward now to getting to know you all a bit better over the months ahead.

Love & hugs to everyone,

Caroline xxx :cry:

11+2

Posts

  • Aww hun, Im so sorry to read of your mum passing. I did not want to read and run. I know the pain of losing someone. Take time for you, I dont think you ever get over it you just adapt to life without them some how. It will get easier in time.


    I m/c at 11 weeks but now Im 26+6 weeks. I hope everything goes well at your scan.

    Thinking of you.
    Big hugs
    xx


  • aw babe i dont no what to say that is so sad i really feel 4 u u must be going through hell just take each day as it comes and take it easy i really dont no what to say to u xxxx
  • Oh Caroline, I'm so sorry to hear about your mum. Nothing I can say will help but we are all here when you want to vent.

    Good luck for your scan tomorrow - let us know how you get on xxx
  • my thoughts are with you and your family,cant imagine how you are feeling,good luck with the scan try and relax and im sure your mum will be guiding you through it x
  • Sending you a big hug sweetie. So sorry about your mum, I can't imagine what you must be going through at the moment.
    Good luck at your scan tomorrow, will be thinking of you, i'm sure everything will be just fine and you'll see your wriggly bean waving at you on the screen.
    Take good care of yourself and let us know how you get on. You know where we are if you need to talk.
    Lots of love
    18+6
    xxxxx
  • Caroline I just popped over from ttc to say I am so sorry for your loss! Your mum will be with you ever step of the way I truely believe that our loved ones never actually leave us!!!
    xxx
  • aww hunny im so sorry,big hugs x
  • Im so sorry hun, my thoughts are with you and your family xxxx
  • I am so sorry hun, I cannot imagine what you must be going through at the moment. You sound so brave. I wish you so much luck for your scan, let us know how you get on. Massive hugs xx

    18+3
  • so sorry for the loss of your brave mum,im sure she will be looking down on you when u have your scan.Cancer is such a nasty illness,i know nothing anyone says will help but just 2 klet u know we r all here if u ever need 2 talk and i wish u all the best in your pregnancy xxxx
  • Oh darling i don't know what to write i just wanted you too know that im thinking about you.
    Your scan will be fine tomorrow & just remember your mum will be with you through everything & im sure there will be little piece of her in your baby.
    My mums mum dies on xmas day on my first christmas & mym umu firmly believes that little piece of my grnny went into me as she often says its like looking into her eyes.

    I cant imagine what you have been through but remember how happy your mum would be when you see your scan & would wnt you to enjoy your pregnancy.

    Sending you all my love & big hug.
    Everything will be fine tomorrow.
    xcx
  • oh hun i'm so sorry to hear this. i am thinking of you at this difficult time.

    good luck for your scan tomorrow, please let us know how you get on. we're all behind you. i think we had MCs around the same time last year. sending you lots of PMA and hugs

    xxxx
    28+3
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