Breastfeeding & OH

I am 27 weeks pregnant and my oh seems kind of weird about the idea of me bf, but I really do want to...even though I keep changing my mind and prob will again lol. I haven't got anyone to talk to about whether to breast/bottle feed though. I honestly don't know anyone who breastfed for longer than a week so they're all quite dismissive of the idea and prob would be disgusted by it!....I know that sounds awful doesnt it! And especially my oh. He says he would be fine with it but only for 6 weeks...I know that's not enough for my baby to get the full benefit.

Were any of your oh's/families sceptical about the benefits of bf, and then later came round to the idea? I doubt I'll be able to do it for 6 months as I will be going back to work before then, but I really would love to give it a try. xxx


  • well worth breastfeeding if you can, my LO now 4 but seemed alot mellower than my friends little girl of same age and wasn't. Like you i had to go back to work at 6 months but still expressed and wasn't as hard as i thought.
    Husband was actually too shattered to worry about himself and helped with expressed milk.
    Any length of time is good for a baby than none at all, but don't worry if you can't there will be plenty to stress over through every stage of them growing up. lol
    Filo x
  • I'm in the same posistion as you image most of the people I know either had bad experiences or just didnt bother when let out of hospital so not really got anyone to ask, in fact thinking about it the only person I know who bf & has good things to say about is my mum with me image I'm kinda in the position of i want to coz it can be beneficial for lo when he arrives but don't want to coz i don't want to have people around me sayin told you you should've bottle fed because that would make me feel like I've failed
  • Its definitely worth breastfeeding if you can. I breastfed my son until he was 20 months and I loved every minute of it. I even cried when I finished feeding him for the last time. He's now 2 and half and has never been ill. He's only had one cold. I'm now 36 weeks with second baby and can't wait to breastfeed again. Your baby will be the most precious thing in your life and you'll want to do anything to keep them safe and healthy, no matter what other paople say or think.
  • My other half was a little freaked at the idea to begine with for lots of reasons, being left out, people seeing me in public seeing my breasts as sexual ect

    we agree to start with 6 weeks and look at how we were getting on and Also I got a breast pump so i could express so he could be involved, and reminded him what they are for and that its best for baby he is fine with it now! xxx

    [Modified by: it_must_be_love on February 01, 2008 05:52 PM]
  • I have decided to bottle feed this lo, I did with my 2nd because I didnt have a good experience when I breast fed my eldest (and other personal reasons) but my oh has always said it is my choice.
    I think what it must be love has suggested is a good idea, but whatever you do - you must not ever think you are a failure. There is a big push by the govt to make women breast feed at the moment (my midwife told me) and so I think you should get plenty of help from your midwife and the health visitor afterwards. Just try to make an informed choice on what you want to do. There are pros and cons to both ways!
  • Hey ladies,
    I am definately going to try and bf this one, I managed it for 4 weeks with my first who is now 3, but was in sooo much pain as she used me as a dummy!! There are definately benefits for you and baby, and it's much easier at night when they wake up at night and you can put them straight on!
    The guilt I felt for stopping was horrible though, I made me cry!

    We were watching something on telly the other night and it said about breast feeding making your boobs saggy and OH was shocked and didn't want me to do it!!!! He's fine about it now as they didn't sag 1st time round, I even did page 3 a year ago lol.xxxxx
  • breastfeeding does not make your bb's saggy, pregnancy does according to a recent study. Changes occur in pg in preparation for breastfeeding so any damage already doen faith85. Filo x
  • I say give it a go. It is the best start you can give your baby even if you only do it for a bit. It's hard at first but if you ask for support and keep calm then you should be ok.
    Re. your partner - I think it is selfish of a man to dictate what his baby feeds. They are your breasts not his and at the end of the day that is what they are made for!! Apologies if this offends but I do think that baby should come first.
  • i actually couldnt bf my little one because we had such difficulty with her latching on. i ended up giving her expressed milk in a bottle which was brilliant but only lasted 8/9weeks because my milk supply dried up. im very jealous (in a nice way) of all the mummies who do it succesfully and i'd definately encourage you to give it a try. it's best for baby, FREE, on tap and no sterilising etc to bother yourself with! good luck hun and honestly, do what YOU feel is best for yourself and your little one. xxx
  • Hello, this is my first and I plan on bf. Always have wanted to and hubby is in agreement as feels its best for our child. I spoke to somebody the other day who described it as the best thing she has done to help her child and stated that its a really nice feeling one you cant describe.

    I would suggest you take a visit to the breastfeeding forum as im sure there will be plenty of mothers/mothers to be who will also offer advice.
    What reasons did your oh give for not wanting you to bf? xxx
  • I agree, you should give it a go if you want to and not worry about what others say!
    When my OH got a bit funny I just said it's best for baby and I want to and he understood and is fine with it. Hopefully your OH will get used to the idea.xxxxx
  • I BF both of mine for 3 weeks, the first I had to stop for her medical reasons, second I stopped because of a serious womb infection and needed some very strong tabs to sort it.

    I did say I wasn't going to BF this one but have now decided that I will, as it's my last one and it would be great to achieve long term feeding. DH was upset when I said I didn't want to feed this one, he's very happy that I've changed my mind, although he'd never make me change my mind.
  • Thanks everyone for replying! I have been on the bf board as well & asked the ladies on there about it. I definitely will try not to feel guilty if I end up switching to bottles as it never did any of us any harm, but I want to try bf first. I must admit the benefit of it being free is great, formula is ridiculously expensive!!

    My oh is still reluctant about me doing it for 6 months, but he was reluctant to have this baby and now he is so excited about it despite denying it! Hehe. xxx

  • Good for you. You will know when the time is right babe, when your oh sees how you and baby are while bf he might feel totally different!
    I am sure all will be well with you!
    Love Lee
  • my oh is a bit apprehensive about it as well, but he's told me that mainly because he doesn't want to feel left out because his daughter who's now 4 was bottle fed so he could feed her. I've explained to him about expressing so he doesn't have to miss out on the night time feeds!!! lol but he still umms n arrrs a bit!! but we've reached an agreement in that if lo is good wi bf & i can handle it he'll support me all the way image just means he'll prob demand more play time privilage when lo starts being able to use toys n crawl round etc!! lol
  • I breast fed all 3 of mine and plan on doing the same with no4.I've had varying experiences.My 1st was tongue-tied so latching on was difficult but I managed for 6 months.My 2nd took to it like she'd done it before but I chickened out at 9 months when she bit me! My 3rd was difficult as I got thrush in one side (give me labour pains any day over this!) But the midwives were a great help.My o/h doesn't like me b/f.He sees breasts as sexual objects and gets jealous.I'm looking forward to b/f my 4th.So give it a try.Its definately worth it xx
  • Im 36wks with 1st and my OH is keener to BF than i am. i've had major sleeping probs since about 24wks and am not sure i can handle a newborn plus disrupted sleep. im gonna give it a go and also express when milk comes in so OH can take turns - the expressing was his idea and he researched pumps, bottles etc so he's obv well up 4 it, but says that if i feel that im not coping with it, FF is the way to go. i think its essential to have support (esp from oh) whatever feeding method you choose cos it will make it easier.
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