Berevement topic - only read if you are comfortable with it

Hi girls,

I know that this is a very happy forum and when you are pregnant you dont talk about bad things happening but I was looking through different topics and had a quick look at this one.

I am usually one to hide my head in the sand, especially when its uncomfortable reading, not because im unsympathetic but because I dont like to think that bad things can happen or curse myself by thinking bad things if you know what I mean.

Anyway the stories were very moving and can really only be read if you are in the right frame of mind, these women are obviously hurting and are so strong.

The point of my post is just to say that one of the posts mentioned that the girl was having contractions at an early stage and the hospital told her to take some paracetamol and go back to bed which was the WRONG advice. I dont know if taking action sooner would have helped but all I can say is if you are worried at all then go to hospital as it could be the matter of life and death. I have heard a few stories of people being advised to not go to hospital when they have called up as so many maternity wards are busy and in one case someone was sent away when they turned up.

Im not urging anyone to read these posts I've said what I felt needed to be said after reading them. I dont want to take a shine off anyone's happy glow by bringing up a sad subject so I am so sorry if ive made anyone upset.

Hope everyone is doing well

Georgie xx 19+6

Posts

  • I agree with you Georgie... I do read some of them but can't bring myself to post as what can you say?
    I know it must sound mean of me but I just would not be able to comprehend what these ladies are going through and I just think there is nothing I can say.
    Its so very sad and I feel for every lady that has lost a baby, whether it be 6 weeks or 36 weeks.

    Much love, Julie xxx
  • Hear hear. I havent read any of these posts but have seen some touching poems written by ladies who have lost their little ones and it breaks my heart

    xxx

    http://tickers.baby-gaga.com/p/dev207pr___.png

  • Thanks girls, I didnt know what reaction I would get from posting something like this as I have seen some people get abusive responses before for bringing up topics that can touch a nerve.

    I winced when opening your replies in case I had said something wrong as I really dont mean to offend anyone and I am so sorry if I have upset anyone.

    I just felt that something needed to be said as we had a case at our local hospital in Haywards Heath where a couple were offered a huge compensation payout due to errors from the maternity staff. The couple knew something was not right and their baby was ready to come out but no-one was helping but they felt they were in safe hands so didnt speak up when they should have.

    Don't be afraid to stick up for what you believe girls. I dont want to scare anyone but you would be suprised at how much the NHS have had to pay out in the last year for errors in Maternity Wards because of the staff shortages. I am by no way criticising the hard work that a lot of good midwives do that they probably dont get enough praise for all I am saying is if you know something is wrong in your gut then dont be afraid to speak out and say something no matter how vulnerable you feel or how busy the staff are. I will be and i've told my o/h to do so if I am not capable.

    xxxx
  • Hear hear as well. I just read some now as I try not to go on there as I find it too upsetting but I just read about somebody I never even knew that has happened to and it's really upset me image

    You are so right, this makes you think, I will make sure any worries I have I am seen!!

    K xx
    20+2
  • i also agree.
    when i read some peoples post, i cant bring myself to reply as i simply dont know what to say and its not that i dont care, i really do and it upsets me, i just find it hard to find the right words.

    Hannah 36+6 xxx
  • Thank you for posting this Georgie, I phoned my hospital on Sunday and was given the wrong advise on the phone, I knew in my heart it was wrong - but didn't like to say because I thought I was beong a neurotic first time mum, and tried to trust the MW that I had spoken to. Thank god my DH, and my mum made me call back a few days later - everything was fine, but could have been so much worse.

    I think it is easy to forget that MW's are stressed out, busy people and are not always right.

    It's not something that we like to think about, but I think you did the right thing posting this, as it is important that people are aware. At the end of the day - our babies are just too important to take any risks.

    Nx
  • I have read the stories there, mostly because the ladies have taken the time to write them. I admit that I'm one to not know how to reply, what can you possibly say?

    I wholeheartedly back up your sentiment to push for medical attention if you feel you need it, this doesn't just apply to pregnant ladies. A person should not feel like they haven't been taken seriously. Having been in customer services all my working life (14 years) believe me its the pushy ones that don't back down that get the best care, and I think this applies to medical issues to.

    Be a pain, don't be palmed off, don't allow yourselves to be ignored, if you're not a pushy person find a friend/ family member who is and let them rip!

    I send all those ladies who have lost, yet to meet, have in their arms their babies the very best xxx
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