What if you have no-one to babysit when you go into Labour?

I'm really starting to panic! it is keeping me awake at night to be honest!

We have no-one to look after our two kids when I go into labour!
and our youngest will be 11 months! We have no friends local (and to be honest we dont have the sort of relationship with them that we can off load our kids anyway!), both are families are also a no-go due to distance and past problems too deep to rectify.

I want a water birth again like last time, as luck would have it my oldest was at a friends for the night last time and I was lucky enough to get a full nights sleep as my contraction started at about 7am and so we went into hospital fine, I was only in for 6 hours then home again! However this time I'm not only worried about the labour being super fast and not getting there in time due to farting about with the kids! also getting there and them not letting me have a water birth as I'm too far along!

Our nextdoor neighbours Husband has offered, however they've not long had their own! so I cant imagine his Wife would be too pleased! and they have another child about 3 yrs old! We get on fine but dont know them well enough to have them round for tea type of thing so I dont feel comfortable imposing on them at what could be 3am! I know I wouldn't be impressed!!!

Then we also have some customers of my Husband who run a small Nursery who offered to help in an emergency but this is a day nursery! although I think they would be great and we'd obviously offer them money!!!

WHAT IF I LABOUR at 2AM??????????????????????????

A home birth seems an easier option but my midwife has told me theres not much chance I'll get a midwife (or my other concern it COULD be HER - she's bloody awful!!) so what if I try labouring and baby is breech or something?
Our house is tiny and too small even for a third child let alone a WATER POOL! so a waterbirth at home is also a NO-GO!! a home birth would be ideal because of all these problems BUT we live in a terraced house with PAPER thin walls and I dont really want my neighbours listeneing to me! nor do I want a dry land birth!!!

HELP me see the light or the silver lining!!! please? Any suggestions!!!!!!!!!!!!!???? I'm dreading my labour and NOT because of pain or anything but because of the dam logistics of labour when you already have kids!!!!!!!!
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Posts

  • the friend who watched your other child the last time, what about them?

    i have been thinking of similar as i have 2 kids also. have decided if we are stuck hubbie will drop me off at the hospital on my own and he can sort it out once we know im in the right place. obviously i want him there with me. and chances are someone will watch the kids but if not there is nothing i can do but go through it alone.
  • If its through the night hon, the kids will be in bed so all you have to do is ask the neighbours husband to come into your house so that they're not alone. I'm sure for 1 night the wife wouldn't mind - not sure when you're due but maybe now would be a great time to get to know them a little better so you're not worrying about it when you're due to go into labour?

    Even if your friends aren't the type who would normally step in and help I'm sure they would in such a circumstance if you asked them and told them how worried you were about it.

    I was due to have my baby in Jan, and am lucky in that my mam lives locally so could have helped out, but I made a back up of getting to know my neighbour really well (due to have her baby any day). As it happens I miscarried and new baby isnt due until april/may time (dont know date yet) but am going to keep up relations with both my neighbours just in case - which includes getting my son used to them.

    The most important thing is to not worry about it; wont help you or baby. Maybe sit the neighbours down (invite them round for that tea!) and have a heart to heart; let them get to know your other kids and take it from there. xx
  • I'm in exact same position, I kind of know 2 people here where we are but moved from NI few months back so don't have any family here and I'm worried about what to do. I had a section last time and wondering if maybe I should opt for this again so can get one my sisters to be here. I really want to try a vbac and having a babysitter isn't best reason to have a section but might be our only option.
    I defintely can't have a homebirth.
    Sorry I've no actual advice but just wanted you to know you're not on your own image
  • Is there anyone on here that lives close by...Im sure that you could return the favour when its their turn.....

    I would do it for you....I live close to Leicester but Im not sure if thats near you ??

    xxxx
  • Thanks dances but we are down South in Hampshire, in fact right on the sea front practically!

    I've been so calm and collected about squeezing this baby out up till now! all the gor and guts doesn't bother at all! its the poxy logistics of it! it gets so awkward when me and Hubby start trying to talk about it and he basically makes me feel like its all my fault!!! Although he doesn't want any family involved either, and also feels bad 'putting upon' anyone early hours of the morning! hell, he doesn;t even want to look after our little one if I have a home birth!!! I feel like I have no support at all xxxx
  • my neighbur was very excited by my labour and was out telling the street the following morning!!! my labour was 11pm until 5am!!! i gave her a big box of chocolates the following day. she was happy.

    are there any services there that might offer some form of help? or have you asked the midwives if they have had this issue before and what they suggest? the only other option i can think of is emergency care. i dont know much about it but i know social services will take children in a short term emergency. a girl used to work with, her mum was an emergency carer and had kids dropped off at all hours for a few days upwards.
  • i didnt mean for it to sound like they would be taken into care! as in you're an unfit mother, just that it might be an option for a few nights, pre-arranged, so you know they are looked after. my mum had a serious op when me and my sis were little and she was offered for us to go into care short term until she was fit, which would have been maybe a week, but my gran had us in the end.
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