MIL visit! Advice ladies!

Hello ladies!
Just want your advice! I have a well meaning MIL who does drive me and hubby insane. She can often say things that are quite unkind and is generally a nightmare. Anyway, hubby hasn't seen her for a months and we both think that at some point soon she'll be on about invitng herself to stay. I really can't face the thought of her coming as if hubby isn't working at weekends we are doing the last few things for baby and I have my class's reports to write etc etc. If she comes you have to entertain her (and resist the urge to throttle her at times). Hubby thinks we should invite her for the day in the next few weeks to get it over with before I get any bigger and more fed up. But she really winds me up and I have actaully avoided answering the phone to her for weeks now(made hubby answer!) since she sent me a really annoying/unkind text about baby.

But then it is hubby's birthday at the start of July and baby is due a few days after that and I suspect she is plotting to say she will come for hubby's birthday in the hope the baby will arrive while she is here (she is quite calculating like that). Hubby isn't that bothered about seeing her, but he wants to get in first as it were, otherwise she catches us off guard and will try and stay over night! I don't fancy the 3 hour drive to hers as I just am not comfy in the car anymore so that's not really an option. So, should I bite the bullet and let hubby invite her for the day now or put it off until after baby is here?

Gosh, didn't reallise how much I'd gone on!


  • Hmm, to be honest thats a difficult one, id say your better off inviting her now before you do get further on and more fed up....although-will that actually stop her still inviting herself for your hubbies birthday in the hopes that baby will arrive during her visit?;10051;28/st/20080729/dt/5/k/9e45/preg.png

  • I would say invite her now and get it over with. Do you have quite a big house or could you start using the 'we havent got room for you' excuse once babies room is finished?
  • id say invite her now and if she says unkind or tactless things then you can bite her head off and put it down to your pregnancy hormones. this is workng well for me. MIL just keeps her trap shut now. yipeeee xxxxxx
  • DO IT NOW!! xx
  • I'd say invite her down for a day now and get it over and done with! Make sure its a day your hubby is around too. But be warned..she will probably want to come up once baby is born to see him/her! If she is unkind or interfering, tell her so, its the only way it'll get any better and if she takes offense oh well..she'll leave you alone then!
  • This is going to sound awful but I wouldnt invite her at all! I am only 6 wks pregnant and MIL doesnt know yet, but I have already discussed visits with my husband. MIL lives 120 miles away and I dont plan on seeing her for the next 9 months! Hubby is more than welcome to go visit her, but I wont be making any plans. I know I am a bitch but I intend to keep stress free in this pregnancy, which means keeping away from her. Do want YOU want to, not want you think you should do. XXX p.s sorry for rant xxx
  • i think you should invite her now BUT wouldnt it be more awkward to make excuses if while she is at yours, she starts making plans to come over for hubbies brthday/baby being born aswell, like face to face while shes there? you would need to think of excuses/reasons why she cant before she mentions it and be prepared!! this is the last thing you need at this stage, or couldnt she come over after baby while others are there? like perhaps your family? then she may not stay for long? and it wouldnt seem so bad casue othersa re there too?;19;29/st/20080523/dt/5/k/1ec5/preg.png

  • Thanks ladies. I hadn't thought that she might try and plot to come when it was hubby's birthday too!

    Spedshaw - I was thinking the same thing put it off till baby is here but hubby doesn't want her visiting the second baby is born and he thinks if she hasn't seen us for a while she will insist on coming the same day I get home. I understand why he wants to get it over with now so to speak but the thought of it really makes me shudder! Hubby is dreading her visit too and its his own mother!

    Hubby is on his way home from work now, so I think we may look at the calendar and work out when is best for us. Why can't I have a nice, non interfering, non insulting MIL! Oh well, could be worse, hubby's Dad and wife number 3 could want to visit!

  • She quizzed me on how long my hospital usually keeps you in for after having a baby because she wanted to plan when she would be able to come! Hubby's face was a picture! I'm sure mine thinks I'll be rubbish, well, she's said as much! We do have three bedrooms, ours, small room for baby and then another double room. It does have a double bed in it, but hubby is taking it apart and putting it in the loft nearer the time baby arrives. It was his idea not mine! She seems to think if she says she'll bring her own bedding and towels it means she can stay??? How weird.

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