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Am i making mountains out of molehills?
When i was 7 mths pregnant my OH was acting sneakily by recieiving and replying to texts from his ex-girlfriend. i only found this out by checking his phone and then confronting him about it. He was arranging to call her the next week and if i hadn't of intervened - then who knows what else. He lied through his teeth about it at first before cracking so that was my trust out of the window.
He apologised profusely and we put it behind us as i figured that i had bigger things happening soon.
After the baby was born, i found out that he owns money to a loan shark and when i asked him about it - he lied again before eventually telling me the truth.
Now he just set up a facebook account, and naturally he is adding lots of friends and getting messages from them - which to me, is fine. i have an account too. Anyway he had a message in his inbox and wouldn't read it in front of me and was acting shifty. So (and i know this is bad) i hacked into his account and found that he is emailing this girl. He knows her from before he met me and there is nothing incriminating in there so why be shifty about it?
He makes me think something is going on and with the trust issues we already have, you would think that he would just be more open about it.
i asked him about it (he doesn't know i have read the email) and he says they are just mates and that i should be trusting him, but how can i when he keeps putting doubt in my mind after all the previous lies?
I feel totally paranoid now, should i give him the benefit of the doubt and move on? I was cheated on badly in my last 2 relationships and maybe my self esteem is that low that i am just expecting that he is going to do it too.
He apologised profusely and we put it behind us as i figured that i had bigger things happening soon.
After the baby was born, i found out that he owns money to a loan shark and when i asked him about it - he lied again before eventually telling me the truth.
Now he just set up a facebook account, and naturally he is adding lots of friends and getting messages from them - which to me, is fine. i have an account too. Anyway he had a message in his inbox and wouldn't read it in front of me and was acting shifty. So (and i know this is bad) i hacked into his account and found that he is emailing this girl. He knows her from before he met me and there is nothing incriminating in there so why be shifty about it?
He makes me think something is going on and with the trust issues we already have, you would think that he would just be more open about it.
i asked him about it (he doesn't know i have read the email) and he says they are just mates and that i should be trusting him, but how can i when he keeps putting doubt in my mind after all the previous lies?
I feel totally paranoid now, should i give him the benefit of the doubt and move on? I was cheated on badly in my last 2 relationships and maybe my self esteem is that low that i am just expecting that he is going to do it too.
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Replies
Like you say why the secrecy!
Hard one to deal with though as you'd have to admit to hacking before you can confront him.