Is it normal/a good idea to let my 14yr old daughter come to my first scan ?
My daughter had asked me if she could come to my scan and I had said yes as long as she could get up early enough for it.I didn't and don't really see a problem with it as I thought this was a good way to make her feel included.My partner of 5yrs however got really funny about it when I told him and said he was unsure what was and wasn't appropriate to let her be involved in.He also said he was worried my daughter might see all th attention I was getting and think getting pregnant is a good idea ie she's a bit of an attention seeker therefor she may think running out n getting herself up the duff will get her all the attention she craves.Now I will admit my daughter does love attention and I've kinda spoilt her with it but surely his "worry" is ridiculouse ? I'm seething inside and told him he has ruined my first scan and now I am no longer looking forward to anything! That he's making it very hard for me to get excited about this baby n that I feel like he wants to push my daughter out.He has always said he loves my daughter like his own n has excepted her as his,he has made a lot of effort with her over the years and is like a dad to her which is why I find his behaviour so confusing when it comes to this pregnancy.I would really appreciate any advice/opinions/veiws and or experience on this.Thanks in advance ladies xx
Replies
Just to add my daughter as far as I know is NOT sexually active however she has told me that she is more attracted to girls.
I personally didn't take my kids to my 12 week scan just in case anything was to go wrong but I did take them to my gender scan and 20 week scan. I thought it was lovely to involve them so they didn't feel like they were being pushed out and they loved it I have a 14 year old boy and a 5 year old girl. I think your oh is being saft with saying that tbh. Xxxxxxx
My girls are much younger at 5 & 7 but I personally felt it was very important for us to include them in our scans...This is my OH'S first baby but he treats my girls as his own always and he fortunately for me agreed. I don't want the girls to feel this baby is any more important to either of us and the scans were a way of showing them this.
The girls came with us at 12 weeks and 20 weeks and loved it (my eldest sulked tho because I didn't want to find out what sex we had haha)...but it was a great experience for all of us.
On the flip side both myself and my partner wanted to have our private 4D scan on our own so we booked it for a time when we didnt have the girls with us. It was lovely to be able to concentrate on our growing baby rather than them distracting us too ! We shared the dvd and photos with them after of course. Maybe this is something you could do with your daughter so that she doesn't feel left out and could be a good compromise if your OH really is against it...she may enjoy the 4D experience more. Each family is different I guess I hope you can reach a good conclusion for you all and it doesn't overshadow what should be an exciting time for you all.