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After baby blues

Myself and my fiancé had a baby back in June. He initiated the idea of trying for a baby and was really good throughout pregnancy and birth, but since then has gone down hill. 

He doesn't seem bothered about spending any family time with us, he's gone away twice now for over a week  which he never did before. He just seems grumpy and miserable all the time. We are having financial difficulties which doesn't help.  I'm worried about it too but I put all my energy into keeping a smile on my face for our babies sake! 

Our life currently consists of me getting up with the baby whilst he stays in bed til midday before going to work. I spend the day with her then do the bedtime routine whilst he either works or sits playing on his phone. Once she's in bed, we eat tea (normally in scilence) then I go to bed while he stays up until the wee hours watching telly. 

I feel like I do everything when it comes to the baby and housework. I've tried talking to him to which (dependent on mood)  he either gets defensive or says he'll make more effort but never does... I don't know how to make things better, short of winning the lottery and paying off our debts! 

Replies

  • I wish that I could help xx

    i just wanted to give you a virtual hug and I hope that everything works out fine. It sounds a bit like postnatal depression for him though, might be worth it if you speak to your GP about it.  Or convince him to see his GP (going with him might help both of you). 

    Google search "postnatal depression in fathers NCT" - there is a very good article on NCT site about it. Cannot paste the link here for some reason, sorry. 

    Take care and all the best xx

  • Your not alone...I promise everything you have written I could of written my self over the last 3 years we have had 3 boys who mean the world to us but our relationship has changed but it does get better, our newest addition was born 4 weeks ago and yet again we are back to that dark place but it does get better...

    i some times feel I'm just stuck in the house cooking cleaning looking after the kids and picking up after my other half and it can get stressful at times! 

    We have days where we hardly say 2 words to each other and there are days I wish he would just up and leave! 

    But then  think of the good times and know that they will come back.

    if you ever need to chat and let of steam the ladies here are lovely and always happy to sit and listen xxx

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