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Step Parent Struggle!

Hey guys, 

I need some advice and to feel normal again!

I am 20 years old, I live with my 26 year old partner who has a gorgeous 4 year old daughter. 

I have wanted a family since I can remember, it's all I've ever wanted! But as my partner and I have only been together a year, we have decided to wait. 

But I can't help whenever he has his daughter, that I have an insane amount of longing for my own child and their bond is something so special that I fear I may be getting upset that I dont have that bond!

I feel awful for feeling the way that I do... but I don't know how to talk to my partner about it without him feel in like I am trying to rush things. 

Please help! 

Thank you chiccas xx

Replies

  • Hi, my husband has two daughters, now aged 21 and 18 and the eldest has 2 of her own (so he is a grandad!).  i have just had my first after being with DH for 14 years ... So we didn't exactly rush into it!!  It was different for me as I had been told it was unlikely I could have children and even though I knew DH would love more at least he had his girls.  However I know exactly how you feel seeing his bond with his daughter and wondering if you will ever have that.  I would suggest talking to him about the fact you would like to have children with him in the future (there is no rush as you are still young - unlike me) as you see what a great Dad he is (flattering them usually helps).  Also enjoy being a step mum with his little one.  I did with DH youngest who was 4 when we got together.  For me it's worked out great as I had fun with her in my twenties without the full time commitment and now that she is grown up and I miss those days of taking her to the park etc we have been fortunate to have our son who is 10 weeks old.  We also have two grown up babysitters who dote on their little brother.

    Hopefully you can chat to your other half and get the reassurance that children will be part of your future and then you can relax and enjoy being a step mum and getting the practice in first xx

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