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Coming between 2 brothers

hi all, firstly I want to start this conversation off by saying I feel ashamed and humiliated as it is :(

but 5 years ago I slept with my boyfriends brother (he wasn't my boyfriend at the time and he knew I had slept with his brother!) but his brother had a girlfriend. It was a secret that was never supposed to Come out and it was long forgotten about. i have been with my partner now (his brother) for 4 years and we have had a son together. I had to meet my boyfriends brothers girlfriend and I made out it had never happened (he did to) but only to protect their relationship! He then admitted it was true, She admitted that if I told her she wouldn't have believed me anyway. Now I've got everyone against me like it's my fault. i was single, no kids, like I said it was 5 years ago! He was the one in the relationship! yes maybe I should have told her but how could I when we would always be together because of both brothers? the brothers have even fell out now Even though there was no secrets between them both it was just the girlfriend. they've now been together 7 years. ive tried speaking to the girl as it obviously makes it awkward for everyone in the family (they knew about it anyway as I did admit to them it had happened) & She will not speak to me at all, shes blaming me for everyrhing and she's even turned to class A drugs to try and "cut it out". I feel terrible, but she's still with her partner they're even getting married now! I just don't know what to do, shall I leave her for a while or shall I try and talk to her again and say how sorry I am? I never meant to hurt her i didnt even know her. 


  • What a terrible situation you're in. If i were you I would take a step back because it doesn't seem like anything you say will make much difference. Its strange that she is so angry with you and not her boyfriend but it's often the case. She said herself she wouldn't have believed you if you had told her so there's nothing you could do or can do in my opinion. I feel sorry for her because she's clearly struggling with this but if anyone should be in the firing line it's her boyfriend. If you keep pushing to resolve this with her you might be accused of rubbing her face in it, even if your intentions are in the right place. Xx

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