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Post-baby body confidence

Hi there, 

My little boy is one month old and I'm really struggling with the way I look post-pregnancy. It is beginning to affect my relationship with his father more and more because I'm questioning everything to do with our relationship. Is this normal? Has anyone else suffered with similar feelings since giving birth? 

I've always struggled with body confidence and felt unworthy, sometimes to the point where I feel so unworthy of being on this planet. My anxiety is getting unbearable and it's casing so much friction between me and my partner. I know he thinks I'm just being silly and that I have nothing to worry about but I can't help how I feel. I've always felt like I don't deserve my partner so to now have a body that is absolutely disgusting makes me feel like he's going to walk away from me. When I try to d things to make me feel better like buying new clothes or doing my hair and make up nicely, he doesn't even notice and that makes me feel like he's looking elsewhere. 

Can anyone recommend anything I can do to try and make myself feel better and to stop taking things out on my partner?

I'm so tired of the arguing and I just want to feel better about myself. 

Thank you in advance x


  • Hi Star, 

    I am sad to come across your thread! 

    Firstly let me assure you that made for mum's in the perfect place to share these thoughts and feelings. 

    Let me start by congratulating you into motherhood I would love to hear more about your son what is his name?. I would suggest looking for post partum in the MFM search bar at the top of the website, this will be a good place for you to see that we are all so different and it will help you to appreciate how normal you are. 

    Please don't describe yourself as disgusting you have just created a human being your body has been through intense trauma and guess what your still here 😁 You've done the hard part so congratulations. 

    Your only 1 month into this journey and not everyone snaps back hun, everything that you have said about your partner not noticing I'm sorry to tell you he sounds like a typical man 😂 they don't notice these things, I am sure he is in awe of you and what you have given him by the way of a son. 

    In terms of your anxiety this is nothing to be ashamed of, I would advise you speak visit your GP there is no shame in asking for help and don't panic your baby won't even be involved it will just be a 15m telephone consultation in the comfert of your own home with a therapist to discuss how they can help. If your not ready yet can I ask how you feel about mum clubs? I see made for mum's as one in itself. It's amazing what a cup of tea and a chat can do even if it's in front of a computer screen. 

    Do you have much support in terms of grandparents? Utilize what you have around you ask them to have your son for a few hours have a soak in the bath do your hair and makeup and do something you and your partner enjoyed before you became parents. 

    Surround yourself with things that make yourself happy even if it's chocolate. change some pictures around your home things you feel you look good in remind yourself you are still that person. 

  • Above is great advice. Just remember baby blues are common and make sure you go to your 6 week check up.

    Your OH will look at you differently as he's witnessed the amazing thing you've done giving birth. Your body has gone through big changes but you'll find your way back just don't put pressure on yourself.

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