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4 weeks pregnant, will be come around to it?
I’m new here, but I recently found out I was 4 weeks pregnant, I was on the pill so it’s a very big shock. Shock aside I am happy about it, even though I’m not in the best situation I’d like to be in. I’ve been seeing my boyfriend for about 8 months, so not long but not exactly a short period. I found out I was pregnant as I wasn’t getting pains in my stomach and feeling very ill and I started bleeding, i ended up going to A&E to be checked and that’s where they discovered I was pregnant. I was horrified at first. I told my boyfriend via text as I was too shocked to even speak to anyone. The words couldn’t seem to leave my mouth. He messaged back shocked and upset and he said he didn’t want no more kids yet (he has 5 already) like I say not the best situation I wanted myself in. Anyways, I told him I wasn’t getting an abortion and he continued to just say he wasn’t ready and he didn’t want any more kids. This was on Thursday, he never replied to my last message has he messaged me saying ‘i swear you’ve done this on purpose’ which can I say made me so effing angry how he’s tried to play the trapped card. why is that even a thing!!! And now I haven’t heard off him since. I messaged the day after to ask if he still wanted to talk face to face and all he put back was ‘oh feel like talking now do you’ which I replied that he was the one who ignored my last message. But since then. Nothing. Nada. Not even to check if I’m ok as I’ve been on bed rest.
Sorry if its a bit muddled up but I’m so angry. I get he’s very shocked as I’m even still trying to get my head around it. It’s life’s changing. I get that. B he always decided to throw the fact we weren’t together ‘properly’ which doesn’t make sense, then he later backtracked to say it’s early stages of a relationship so it means it’s not full blown! Which I agree it’s earlt stages like I’m not living with the guy or even close to but it’s still anbloody relationship. Sorry. I’m rabbiting on. What do I do?
I’m a very easy going person too, if he doesn’t want have anything to do with me but he wants to be there for the baby that’s fine, if he doesn’t want anything to do with either of us then that’s fine to but as long as I know.
He’s still looking at all my social media stuff and all that jazz. (By the way I’m 24 and he’s 35)
thanks in advance xx
Sorry if its a bit muddled up but I’m so angry. I get he’s very shocked as I’m even still trying to get my head around it. It’s life’s changing. I get that. B he always decided to throw the fact we weren’t together ‘properly’ which doesn’t make sense, then he later backtracked to say it’s early stages of a relationship so it means it’s not full blown! Which I agree it’s earlt stages like I’m not living with the guy or even close to but it’s still anbloody relationship. Sorry. I’m rabbiting on. What do I do?
I’m a very easy going person too, if he doesn’t want have anything to do with me but he wants to be there for the baby that’s fine, if he doesn’t want anything to do with either of us then that’s fine to but as long as I know.
He’s still looking at all my social media stuff and all that jazz. (By the way I’m 24 and he’s 35)
thanks in advance xx
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Replies
I am sorry you ate in this situation and in all honestly I can not say if he will come round or not. He is obviously shocked and I think in this situation men often feel powerless. He obviously doesn't feel ready for a child but he has no control over your decisions. Try and see it from his point of view. If you really did not want a child and were not ready for one but had no choice over it.
my suggestion is that you have to do what is right for you. You have said you want the baby and are happy if he is involved or not. The best thing to do is carry on with your life and look after yourself. Be polie to him and maybe explain (if you all ready havent) that you want the baby but its totally up to him what involvement he has. You may just find that he will come round if not you will have a beautiful little person to worry about.
you do need to separate yourself from him though. getting upset that he hasn't asked how you are isn't going to help. If you are happy to do this alone you need to forget about what he is and isnt doing.
I have my fingers crossed that he will come round and you can work things out.
Your baby and you come first in this situation. He might change his mind but if he doesn't, youll be ok. It's hard but worth it.