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Help!! Inappropriate or not

My 5 old son came home from school today and wet himself when just sat on a chair which is completely unlike him. When changing him I asked him if everything was OK. He started to get upset and told me that another boy in his class had put his finger up my sons bum when he was having a wee. I've had the chat with him previously regarding not allowing anyone to touch him in certain places etc 

I asked him if he told the teacher and he said no mummy because you said I must tell you. ( not realising he should tell her too). I told him I was so happy he told me and I told him in going to speak to his teacher so it doesn't happen again.I'm so annoyed! Why should a 5 year old have to experience that!! I spoke to a friend and she said I'm over reacting and to not speak to the school as kids will be kids. I am going to speak to the school as I believe as a parent I have a responsibility to protect my son and make him feel safe and secure! Am I in the wrong?? Thanks in advance for your help and advice


  • 100% need to bring it up with teacher and I don't think you are overreacting

    Keep us updated what they say and I hope he's not too upset by what has happened x

  • Hi Mrsk,
    Please do call your school or make an appointment with his teacher asap. This sounds really inappropriate and you are not overreacting at all - your poor little boy sounds terribly upset by this too - you really should speak with his teacher as soon as you can.

    Yes, kids will be kids, but to me, this doesn't sound like a kiddy thing to do (like getting pushed or kicked etc).

    Please let us know how it goes.  

  • Yes I think u should definitely speak to the school about that in waiting it will turn into bullying and u son came to u in need of comfort so he definitely didn't feel safe or liked the idea of the finger in his bum business take action mom don't let it get worse image

  • i think it definitely needs bringing up with the headteacher and something put in place. It's no surprise your son is upset, I hope he is feeling better! 

  • I would say that should definitely be brought up with the school. My 4yo wouldn't even think about something going in a bum except poo. So why would this 5yo think about going into a bum with his fingers? As a nurse this flags up possible abuse. To this little boy is "normal" or how he thinks friends behave? I would be quite concerned about this. It's obviously horrible this is my first thought but after so many courses on child protection this is how I am trained to think.

    Good luck. I hope your son is OK.  Poor thing will be traumatised. 

    And as for your friend I think she needs to being herself up to date with today's society and realise that that isn't standard child behavior. All child behavior is taught from somewhere!

    Natalie x

  • Oh my gosh yes!!! Not only has your poor little one had that happen to him but that child has a high chance that he's being molested too. I wish you guys all the best. xx

  • I think it's totally appropriate to talk it out with the teacher. Antics like these should not go unnoticed. I'm sure teachers and the staff would be more wary of such incidents after knowing parents' concern. 

  • Hello

    You are absolutely right to talk to the school. Yes kids will be kids but this other kid has most defiantly crossed the line. That is not normal behaviour from children and should be questioned.

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