Help Not feeling appreciated by my Childs father (we are separated)
Hi basically I am in a very difficult situation.
I have been rising my child on my own for a couple of years as father was not able to do so. I have got him back in touch with the father and he is seeing my daughter.
Now its been a month since they met and he's having her overnight. not only that she have come home saying she have slept in bed with him and he's partner, I have not met his partner yet and told him when I first met up with him, that I dint not want him to introduce out child to her yet as I did not know her.he did the first night my child stayed over he's house and got angry when I got upset about it.
I feel that he has no respect for me as her mother in addition he has not once said thank you for raising her all these years and things like that.
I feel that I gave him a child now he is playing happy families with his partner and my child I feel extremely upset about this because I I raised her all on my own and I am not even seen as a friend to him just some he had a child with and thats strictly it ,what should I do?
Replies
Hi Jenny,
Indeed it must be a tough and awkward situation you have found yourself in. I do understand the pain of raising a child single-handedly only to lose her to your partner a few years down the line. However, I believe that your X requested to have the child overnight and you accepted. It, therefore, tells me that you should not be bitter since the child will be back as soon as you want her. About the man not appreciating you, I would like you to know that typically, men find it difficult to pronounce words such “as I am sorry’’, “thank you” and so forth. So I really don’t think it will be beneficial to try to make your decisions based on this. In fact, your X respects you, and he really appreciates everything you have done for him. That is why he gets in touch and takes your daughter to his house where he has another woman. Very few men will actually do this. So it is my considered opinion that you change tact. This man is coming to roost soon, and he will start supporting you with your daughter. Just play it calm and listen to what he says.
How old is your daughter? Is she enjoying being with him? I know it bothers you, but you have to think on your daughter. If she enjoys his dad and her new stepmom, you shouldn´t intervene much. It maybe hurts you and maybe you could feel jealous, but you have to put up with it. For your child´s sake. After all, her happiness is the most important in all of that.