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Serious Sleep deprivation!!! - Any suggestions please!!!!!

Evening ladies

I have posted a few times but do have to confess to being mostly a lurker!! I have a gorgeous 21 month old little girl who was born at twenty eight and a half weeks in March 08 but apart from moderate reflux does not appear to have any lasting issues apart from not liking sleep!!!

I am really shattered (as is dh) and my new years resolution is to try and solve the issue!! We have tried all sorts and even controlled crying which I personally dislike and find traumatic but know different things work for different people!! Also little one can cry for up to two or three hours at a time and then it only works for a short time and we have to start again from scratch!!

She does not eat brilliantly so I know this contributes to the problem and we are trying to work on increasing her appetite. However any other ideas wouldbe brilliant. Also has anyone tried alternative therapy, homeopathic, osteopathic, reiki etc as few people have suggested these but I am quite cynical!!

Any ideas would be more than welcome, I would love to start 2010 by looking and feeling a bit more human than I do now!!

Thanks in advance

Sleepy xxxx

Replies

  • I feel for you honey I really do. My ds didn't sleep through until he was 10months and that was bad enough!!
    I cured the problem with controlled crying and it did work for us but yes I found it traumatic and hubby had to hold me down to stop me going to lo sometimes but it took 3 nights and he then started sleeping through the whole night from 7pm until 6am. He does go trhough stages of night waking now but usually a nightmare or if he's got a cold etc.

    The only advise I can give is a good bedtime routine if you don't already ahve one and a dedicated bedtime. Ds has a bath jsut before 6pm then comes down to watch bedtime hour or read books but he's not allowed toys etc at this time as its quiet time. he then gets his teds and so-so (muslin) and walks up the stairs and climbs into bed at 7pm, we then have one story in bed and light goes out and he knows this is the routine.

    I'd also advise when you do go in to settle lo and you keep lights very low, i got a dimmer switch and I make no eye contact and don't really speak to lo.

    I'm not sure if her appetite would affect her sleeping as my son has always had an appalling appetite but it doesn't affect his sleeping now.

    have you thought about getting some professional advice? When ds was about 8 months i broke down with hv as I was so tired and working too and she said that tehy generally don't offer help until after 11months, but after that if a lo has never slept through they will then offer help such as a nursery nurse spending a few nights with you to see whats happening and also she mentioned about sleep therapy sessions.
    As for all the alternative therapies I haven't a clue if any work or not but I do know an imsomniac that had homeopathy and it worked a treat!!

    Hope things get better for you soon as sleep deprivation is so hard to cope with.

    take care Claire xx
  • Hey Sleepy,
    I watched a programme the other day called The Baby Whisperer and the LO on there had a very similar problem to the one that you have - although, at 15 months old, she was still breast feeding up to 9 times a night! Nightmare!!! The biggest problem they had was the baby's attachment to Mum (obv because of the feeding), and so they sent Mum away for 3 nights, replacing her with Dad and Granny!! They knew that she didn't NEED to eat during the night, and were hoping that it would increase her appetite during the day. The baby was also starting the night in her own bed, but then Mum was putting her in a cot next to their bed when she wanted feeding, so it was all a bit confusing.
    The plan they used was to leave the baby in her own bed for the whole night, and each time she stirred either Dad or Granny went in, picked her up and cuddled her to settle her, and simply whispered 'its sleep time now' before putting her back down. They repeated this until she settled.
    After 2 nights, the baby was only waking once or twice, and able to put herself back to sleep each time - without the need for any feeds, and she was up to 3 meals during the day after about a week.
    Don't know if something like this would work for you but might be worth a go!!
    Sarah x
  • Thanks for your input ladies, sorry have not replied before! Well the good news is we have finally had a few nights sleep! We were getting the odd one since New Year (albeit some 4.45 starts.... but that was good enough for me!!) I have also given up breast feeding as of Sunday morning when DD and Big sister stayed at my parents (twelve hours sleep - bliss!!), we then had two more reasonable nights although I kept waking up. However the last two have been a nightmare again and I can't see why!! I do however agree with you Clare that food does not seem to be related as I have been keeping a food diary and there is no link between good eating days and good sleeping nights!!! Have tried Controlled crying again but only lasted three nights and it was a nightmare (don't think I am fully committed as did try for a week in past, thought it had worked and then back to square one!!! Think should have perhaps pushed for Nursey Nurse a bit earlier as knowing my luck they would probably come on one of our good nights!!

    Sarah - thanks for the bit about Super Nanny, think I may need to progress that - obviously started it by them going to my parents but may be better in own environment.

    Sorry for the waffle but as you can probably see by time of post sleep deprivation is setting in again!!

    Has anyone else got any ideas????

    Thanks

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