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Sleepin through the night

Hi, my little boy is 19 months old and still doesn't sleep through the night. Just wonderin if anyone elses LOs about his age r the same? I no it is my fault cos i did hold him ALOT when he was a baby and as I was livin with my dad at the time didnt have housework to do so my time was spent entirely with him so I didnt really get into a routine at bedtime. He goes to bed about 7 every night and this is fine but I have to be in with him until hes asleep otherwise he screams! He cries so much and gets himself so worked up that he cant sleep so i do take the easy option. I have tried leavin him and keep checkin on him but I cant stand seein him get himself so worked up so i always give in. Once he is asleep hes fine for a few hours then he wakes up. He dont have milk durin the night but just wants me. If i get to him as soon as he wakes up I can usually give him his dummy and he'll go back to sleep but most of the time I have to stay with him until hes aslepp again or I end up puttin him in my bed cos im so tired. I no this is all my doin and do try every now and again but just really hate seein him so upset. Has any1 got any other ideas i could try? xx

Replies

  • i am in the same boat my love my little boy is 22 months and used to sleep through the night lovely until recently,we have to stay with him until he is asleep too.i tryed last night getting him to sleep b4 he went to bed,so he went in his bed lovely but of cause half way through the night the quilt,teddies and pillows were in our bed lol.
    so your not on your own love.i would like some ideas too xx
  • I have to say i would be very cruel to be kind [to yourselves] and id let him cry and cry and cry, he would soon get the message, i bet you if you done it for 1 week solid he would be a changed boy.
    Its not fair to blame yourself either cause we all have bad habits for our kids and God knows you will do just about anything to get a good nights sleep but you really need to just put him to bed and walk out and close the door. He will soon learn to go to sleep himself and so if he wakes during the night he will know to go back to sleep by himself.
    Sorry to sound so harsh but i know from experiance cause my wee woman didnt sleep through till 9 months and it was my hubby who broke her habit when i was on night duty so i have to hand it to him, it really does work. x
  • Thanx for ur reply Diane. I no this is what I need to do, its just easier said than done but I am determined to do it cos I no the longer I leave it the harder it wil be. LOs in my bed already tonight but im plannin on startin tomorrow. Ive been explainin it to him today sayin that he wil be goin in his own bed from tomorrow and mummy wont be gettin in with him anymore cos hes a big boy now. Il keep u updated on how it goes! Hope u can try something aswel Beduff as I no how u feel xx
  • Hi Tara, my friend is experiencing the same difficulties with her son, who is 19 months. He will only go to sleep with milk and wakes up betweek 15 to 20 times every night! She has just had another baby last week, so is extremely tired bless her.

    My LO is 18 months and I had him in his 7pm bedtime routine from 10 weeks....except the last few weeks he has decided to cry at bedtime and would only let me comfort him and not my hubby. He is getting to heavy to rock, so I had to sit with him until he went to sleep...unfortumentely after just 2 nights he got used to that, so I had to let him cry. The first time I did this, I shut the door saying that it was his bedtime, then when he hadn't stopped after 5 mins, I picked him up, gave him a kiss and said it was time for him to lie down and go to sleep and that Mummy was going to bed too. After a couple of times he got the message and eventually fell asleep. This happened for four nights and fingers crossed, he now just rolls over when we put him in his cot and goes to sleep on his own just like he used to!!

    I have read some research that around this age they can suddenly experience seperation anxierty, so I guess this is what my LO was feeling.

    Good luck, u will make it in the end x
  • Hello, You must be so tired!

    Like Emma, I had Joshua in a routine by 9 weeks. We'd put him to bed at 7pm he'd sleep till 10pm we'd wake him up for a feed and then he'd sleep through till 7am. BUT it wasnt easy and took a lot of perserverance! By 5 months he was sleeping right through without any feeds. However, he has occasionally woken up mainly if he's ill, but recently he's woken up once or twice and we have had to bring him into bed with us which isnt comfortable for me or oh! Luckily he seems fine now but I think it is a bit of seperation anxiety.

    Im afraid I think being cruel to be kind has to be the way forward...mummy and daddy need their sleep! Good luck lovely xxx
  • anne is 2years 8 months and she has been waking through the night again for just over a month, i have tried to just let her cry it out but she just screams she did it for 3 hours last night and she still did not go sleep.

    we have tried the supernanny one where you just pick them up and put them in bed, but that did not work aswell.

    so tonight im going to try and put her in her bed then sit on the floor until she goes to sleep, then do it again the next night but move closer to the door, then hopfully i will be able to go out of the room one night with her still awake and not scream.

    hope everyone manages to get there lo's to sleep.

    becki.xx
  • Just an update for you all. I started the new sleepin routine last night. Was meant to start the night before but LO was at my dads durin the day and didnt get back until after I was plannin on puttin him to bed so left it another night. Changed Sols routine at bedtime so he gets some quiet time before goin to bed so he now has a nice relaxin bath, then we just sit in the front room (no tele on, no playin) and he drinks his milk then we go up to his room to bed. I used to get in bed with him and was goin to try controlled cryin but last night decided that im goin to sit next to his bed and slowly get further away each night as this would be less distressin for the both of us. I thought Sol would be fine with this as i used to do this and he would just lay there as long as he could see me but last night as soon as I put him in his cot he screamed like ive never heard! It was so horrible listenin to him and I did give him the occasional cuddle (with him standin in his cot as I would of never got him back in if I got him out). I couldnt get him to lay down and he wouldnt take his dummy but I persevered and eventually got him to lay down after an hour of constant screamin and got his dummy in then 10 minutes later he was soundo! I was so proud of myself for not givin in to him but i did feel so bad lettin him get so upset, he was sobbin in his sleep for about half hour after. He did wake 3 times in the night. The first time about 10 and it took about 20 minutes to get him to lay down and go back to sleep then he woke up again about 12 and this time he layed down for me straight away and took about 10 minutes to go back to sleep (he just wanted me to be there I think) then he woke up at 2.30 for about 15 minutes (stood up moanin/cryin for about 10 mins then layed down and drifted off to sleep again). This time was the hardest for me as he'd woken me up from a deep sleep so I was very tired and just wanted to go back to bed. The old me would of picked him up and put him in bed with me but I thought hes done so well so far that I cant give in now so I stayed there til he went to sleep then he didnt wake up til 7 this mornin! It went alot better than I thought for the first night (although I didnt expect the screamin as I was in the room but it still didnt take as long as id expected). I really hope everyone else is doin well xx
  • Hello

    I have also posted on here for a simular thing. Look at it for some advice 'Advice needed please' by PumpkinPatch.

    I have tried the CC thing for over a week now and every time I do it makes the whole situation worse and my lo ends up hurting herself. And it makes me feel so guilty. I do think that it works for some and not others.

    Well done for getting something sorted, I hopes it works out for you.

    Kerry, Freya and Pink Bump
    X X X
  • Hello

    I have also posted on here for a simular thing. Look at it for some advice 'Advice needed please' by PumpkinPatch.

    I have tried the CC thing for over a week now and every time I do it makes the whole situation worse and my lo ends up hurting herself. And it makes me feel so guilty. I do think that it works for some and not others.

    Well done for getting something sorted, I hopes it works out for you.

    Kerry, Freya and Pink Bump
    X X X
  • well done, im sure you have turned a corner already, keep us updated on how he is doing. x
  • Thank you so much for everyones advise and support. What a great website this is! Makes u feel much better and like ur doin the right thing when u feel like a bad mum! Il definately keep everyone posted xx
  • Just thought id update u all again. Sols sleepin is goin really well. 2nd night he sat cryin while I read him a story then he layed down and just looked at me with occasional moans and went to sleep after 35 minutes of bein put to bed. He did wake up at 10.10 and 11.50 but only for about 10 minutes. He just wanted a cuddle then layed back down then he slept til 6.30! Last night he went to bed and layed down straight away, no cryin, i read him a book then he just layed there and fell asleep after 35 minutes. He woke up at 11.30 and 2am and when he woke up at 2 I put him into bed with us as he'd poured baby oil all over his room in the day and where the fresh air was goin (as we had to close the windows when we put him to bed) it was smellin reallin really strong so I didnt want him inhalin it. I thought this would take me back to stage 1 of sittin right next to him again but tonight I put him to bed at 7.15, layed him down, sat near the door! and read him a book then said its time to go to sleep now and he was asleep by 7.45! I think this was definately the right way for me to get him to sleep by himself. Once im out the room completely at bed time my next mission is to get him to get himself back to sleep durin the night. Hope everyone is doin well xx
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