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Controlled crying question

Well, bit the bullet.

My Oh has been putting hugo to bed for the last few months, with Hugo still tossing and turning for a good half hour and needing a hand hold or even holding down to go to sleep. Tonight oh just had enough, after sittign there for an hour and holding Hugo down and having Hugo moan and so on, he just went out and said: 'this is just getting me too stressed'.

Seeing how this was the reason I made my oh put Hugo to sleep in the first place (I used to put Hugo to bed, but it would drive me bonkers and I would get angry at Hugo), I for the first time have left Hugo to cry it out, left for five minutes, then a minute of shhh and patting his leg after putting him down in lying position and leaving. Then left him cry for around 8 minutes, went to reassure again, then another 12 minutes and he stopped crying. Left it for another 5 mins and there he is asleep on his pollow!

So tommorow when he goes to bed at nine, we re giving him cuddles, smoochie and goodnight and leaving him to it. No, holding hand, or holding down. Hugo has to learn to fall asleep! (he actually sleeps quite well and has been sleeping through since about 3 months, even though breastfed, but has always had issues with falling asleep).

I hope this does not traumatise him, a bit heartbraking to hear him cry ...

NOW a question -
Sometimes I nap with him at home, in the big bed, and I quite like it, but I read that if I do CC at night, I should do it at daytime as well, but I don't really want to? He has never really napped in his cot during day, and 50% of the time he naps in his buggy when we are outside during the day. So Can I just leave the cc for night time?

Thanks loads in advance,
Edite and Hugo 15 months

Cheerio xx


  • Hi hun.

    I have been doing PUPD with Tyler for the last 2 nights running but like you I like having a cuddle with him in the afternoon. Its all trial and error as every baby is different. I am VERY lucky (and hope Im not jinxing things) that I can have a cuddle when he sleeps in the afternoon. I let him fall asleep on me but I put him down before he wakes so he wakes up alone and the PUPD at night he has only cried for 10-15 mins before he falls asleep. But on saying that last night was only night 2 and Im pretty sure he'll soon clock on to it and really protest! Good luck hun, its hard leaving them to cry but hopefully worth it in the long run! xx
  • My DS2 is now almost 26 months and we did CC with him at the start of this year when DS3 came along.

    I would have to cuddle him to sleep for every nap in the day and at night too. It was crazy, I had a massive baby bump and had to try and fit DS2 on my lap to get him to sleep! When DS3 eventually arrived I was going around in circles for 3 weeks until we decided on the CC. I'd get DS2 to sleep, then BF DS3 and get him settled, then DS2 would wake up and I'd settle him again, then his crying would wake DS3 etc, you get the idea!

    Anyway, I would personally say to be consistent and do the CC for daytime too as it might confuse Hugo if you do one routine one time and another at bedtime. With DS2 we didn't really have a choice other than to do CC for day time naps and bedtime as I had DS3 to see to also but I'm glad we did it as he now gets in to bed for his day nap without a fuss and has a good couple of hours which gives me a much needed break as DS3 usually naps around the same time!

  • THanks ladies.

    Kelly - thing is he has no issues with napping during the day, I love it that he can nap in big bed with me and I dont have to cuddle him then, it usually takes about 5 mins for him to go off, and then I just leave him in big bed and he has a good two hour nap. Also I cant really impliment the cc when we are out? Because he naps in the buggy, and we are out loads?

    Maybe I will see how it goes with just having him a cry at bedtime ...

    Ahh babies are tough :P
  • I would just see how you go at bedtimes for now then, if he seems to be getting the hang of getting himself to sleep on his own and it doesn't confuse him with day time naps then carry on. With DS1 I used to love snuggling up with him for a nap in the day time, especially when PG with DS2, I was worn out! Now on no3 I'm lucky if I get to sit down once they are napping, always so much to do.

    Yeah, if you're out a lot with the pushchair then you can't really do CC in the day, wouldn't work!

    Just take it one bit at a time and concentrate on the night time CC for now I think. Once he's grasped that then you can decide if you need to do anything else. If he's still settling easy enough in the daytime then you probably won't need to do anything else.

    Good luck, it is hard but worth it in the end x x
  • hows it going? Hope its getting easier for you both. xx
  • Thanks hon, it s great, on third day he just moned for a second and then yesterday, when he knew we will put him in bed, But as soon as we went out of his room, no crying and asleep in about 10 minutes.

  • reading up on your success i might have to try this with my lo, at the minute he goes to bed the same time as my older 2 which i see as unfair due to him being quite a bit younger, but he wont go sleep up there on his own now out of habit. i need to get him in a perfectly structured routine before number 4 arrives in april and this seems like a good option, my only qualm is he'll be 2 next week and i'm not sure if it will work on him being so old. xxx
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