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Why is my two and ahalf year old boy so angry?

Hi there just after some advice my two and a half year old boy has turned into an absolute pickle this week!He used to be very laid back and would accept the word no.But now when he doesnt get what he wants he hits me or throws his toys,he seems so full of anger i dont know what to do with him.I've been stern telling him mummy doesnt like being hit and ignored the bad behaviour as much as poss but it doesnt seem to make much difference.Any advice would be great.x


  • Hi hun-I think they all test their boundaries at some stage,my eldest is exactly the same! He'll be 3 in Dec,and recently he challenges EVERYTHING!!!!!!!

    I think carry on with what your'e doing,ignore bad,praise good,explain it's not nice to hit,I have been taking priveledges away too as my son argues his point as if he were 10!!!!!!!!!

    It works most days but we do have the odd random kick or headbutt,then it's sit quietly until he apologises-which he knows when he's done wrong so hence why I try this. I also turn tv off if it's on-or remove his book/toy until he calms down.

    My youngest is a horror-have no idea what to do with him!!!!!image Hope he doesn't get worse-no,actually I think that's impossible!!!!!!!!!

    Good luck-be strong sounds like you're doing great!

  • hi jayne

    you are not the only one hunny, my son charlie will be 2 in jan,he was a very laid back baby  and the last month he has been a horror, anything i ask him to do whether its get dressed, brush teeth, change nappy etc.... or even telling him not to do something, the response from charlie is no, no and yep you've guessed it NO. he also hits, bites and tries to pinch if he cant get his own way and throws things to,

    in our house we have a naughty spot which charlie gets put on for 2 mins if he ignores 2 warnings he gets, some times i've reached the point where i think why the hell am i bothering with this naughty spot but this week when i gave him his second warning and told him the next place would be the naughty spot he said no and then ran over and laid down without any complaint to have his nappy changed, so it must be working. we also ignore him to if he does things we don't think are appropriate.

    my health visitor popped round yesterday and i mentioned to her charlies behaviour and she said its unfortunatly a 'normal' phase for him to go through, but to continue with the naughty spot and the ignoring of the bad etc......

    please don't think you are the only ones cause you ain't and unfortunatly i think its something we all have to grin and bare lolimage, keep doing what your doin and hopefully your little man will sort himself out soon cause believe me i'm keeping everything crossed for myself so will for you to

    take care

    luv zoe x,

  • Hi,Jayne.Another grumpy two year old here too.My daughter turns three in December too.These last weeks she's turned from really easy going to saying"Yuck!"  to foods she used to eat.Telling me to ssh,be quiet  if I tell her somehing she doesn't like.Also does this cross arms and says "then I'm not talking to you!" and stomps off.Another favourite is just "Humph!"

    Moody little things,but they're just testing the boundaries and asserting their personalities.It passes as long as you don't give in to it.Never reward the behaviour just pay as little attention as possible to it and praise the good.Have to avoid the temptation to laugh (specially the Humph! one)when I'm supposed to be cross.We have started using that naughty spot,I've a 19 month old following close behind or rather joining in the fun.Hitting people you have to deal with,cos that's not acceptable,it's more than a bit naughty or cheeky.Definately gets a naughty spot for that one.They have to know that's not on.

    It'll pass,just not overnight.They're just warming us up for the teenagers they'll turn into in little over ten years.image

  • me too!

    jack will be 2.5 in dec, he is throwing everything when told no, he looks for things to throw and actually shakes with anger, weve done naughty step now for 2 weeks and hes finally realising thats it, and the throwing is getting less and less its now when hes really stressed and i can kinda see why hes that angry iyswim!

  • Hi thankyou all for your replies and great advice.Its very reasurring that all toddlers are pickles and not just mine! Felt more confident today with dealing with Adams tantrums and will def try the naughty spot. He is just going to have to learn that im the boss and what i say goes! Ha ha easier said than done but i can but try!! Jayne xx
  • Hi Jayne,yeah it is easier said than done!!!!!image

    Bet worse to come in the teenage years-hope mine are nothing like I was!!!!!!image

  • My son is at his most challenging this week...I actually had a cry yesterday as his behaviour had worn me down. It's quite a relief to hear that other children behave in exactly the same way and gives me hope. The terrible two's can come and go quickly if you ask me! The good praise works temporarily and then it's a barrage of no's and toys being flung around and then it's moments of angel. a relief seeing all the other comments on here and i know it's just a phase.
  • Hi Eleanor how are you? Hows your little man? Mines still trying to rule the roost but i find if i tell him in a firm low voice that i dont like what he's doing then ignore him if he continues he seems to calm down.Some days its harder than others as its hard to be patient with him when im tired or just wanting five minutes peace! I hope your right and that it is just a phase.
  • Hi my 2 1/2 year old son went crazy tonight.  I took him to the soccer field to watch a game, but it was over.  When I left the game he went crazy.  It did not stop there, he just cried all night long from then on.  I don't know what happened.  So, he fought to go to bed, but finally my husband got him to stay.  About 1am he started screaming in the living room, so my husband brought him in our bed to calm him down, but he just wouldn't stop screaming.  I felt his belly thinking he may have a stomach ache, but his stomach wasn't hard, it was normal.  I just need  some help on what happened between before we went to the soccer field to after we came home and he was throwing a fit about not stopping.

    Thank you.

  • HI

    Am new here but so relieved to read this as thought it was just my son that was like this!! Thanks for reassuring me also. Its the screaming that makes me want to cover my ears!!!

  • Soooo glad im not the only one!! I came on here looking for answers for what to do but i can see i am already doing everything suggested.  I just get so upset when i see my 2 & half year old so angry and frustrated. He has been an absolute delight to have so far and i cant seem to figure out  where im going wrong!  I am firm and consistant with 'the rules', we play together, make things, go places he enjoys etc.. I love him more than life itself and hate the falling out and screaming tantrums. Last night he had the most terrible tantrum, he was so angry and nasty i thought he was going to explode!!  He was kicking and punching and scratching and shouting 'im going to bite you mummy!'  He eventually calmed down and snapped out of it as quickly as it started then was full of apologies and cuddles.....! :S  

    Its reassuring to know that i am not alone and just hope it passes quickly!

  • reward charts works well for me - my son is 4 and likes to scream at me when telling him what to do or when to do it etc. But having a chart where he gets a cross face or black cross when being naughty and smiley face or sticker when he is being good has really helped. He still has his moments but nothing like he used to. Like others have said - it is a stage of development that we all have to get through. Good luck image 

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