Forum home Toddlers & older children Toddler
🚨 Advance warning 🚨 This forum will be closing on 1st May – please see our pinned thread for more information.

Controlled crying?

Hi ladies,

Was not quite sure where to post this as my son is nearly 14 months so in bewteen the baby and toddler stage. We have always had problems with his sleeping but lately it has got beyond a joke and although we always said we would never do cc we dont quite know where else to turn. All advice we have got from professionals is cc!

I just wondered if anyone on here had done cc with a baby of similar age to me?

I no its a contriversal subject but feel at a complete loss.

Thanks for your time



  • Am sure there someone that may offer better advice that me but wheni have needed to i suppose what i do with my lo is controlled crying!

    I had to do it tonight as he wouldnt settle straight away, he usually does. I usually tryto leave him for about 10 minutes and if not settled by then go back in just quietly shush and just lay back down and put dummy back in and walk out again. ANd then another 10 mins start! I had to go back twice tonight and realised i'd forgot his music which i usually put on to settle him as soon as i put this on and resettled him he was calm in no time.

    Have done this kind of thing from quite an early age, when put ot bed i would leave to whinge/grizzle for about 5-10 mins before checking and resettling and its the first couple of times which is hardest for both you and lo but it soon works! I find it so hard and would have to make myself busy so not just sitting listening to lo!

  • Its horrid and I wouldn't recommend it to anyone and say its fabulous, but it DID work for us, after many people, Doc, HV, hubby telling me it was the only way to carry on with life.

    Our daughter was 10 months ish I think when we did it, as we had had 2 months of hell with her feeding on me for upto 4 hours a night, I was literally pinned to the couch, and then as soon as I put her in her cot she would wake.

    We did the 5 mins, then 7 then 10.

    Now she is 16 months we just go straight out for 10, and normally she is settled with 2-5 mins, but if not we go in after 10 mins and re-settle, then another 10. There is a certain amount of guesswork, as often she is whimpering but actually asleep, so us going in disturbs her, but this you seem to get an extra sense for and we rarely disturb her now.

    You have to stick it out for a week, and keep it up, as soon as there is teething, illness or any change to norm we have to start it over, yet the next night she is perfect again.

    I would say 9/10 nights she goes down with no more than one protest cryout, and it is now rare that we have to do full CC with re-settling etc.

    I wish you luck, and a hubby that holds you hand, you both need to be full into it, otherwise it won't work.

    You have to do whatever fits by you and your family though

    Bets XxX
  • I agree with betsygrub, it is a horrible process to go through but it worked for us too!!

    we did cc at 11 1/2 months as my son was still taking 3/4 times a night, so we bit the bullet and did cc and within 4 nights he was sleeping through. he will still occasionally wake in the night but just its either because he's fell out of bed, uncovered and cold or wants a drink, and then he goes back to sleep straight after.

    hubby was stronger than me and a couple of times he had to forceably hold me downstairs to stop me going up to him too soon. So you must be a partnership on this and you'll need his cuddles too!!

    good luck if you decide to go for it and let us know how you get on

  • Hi

    I would recommend this website You have to buy the book to be able to get on to the forum but once you do you can receive daily advice from sleep experts who can help you get therough the CC process and advise you on what you are doing right / wrong or maybe identify a completely different cause for the sleeplessness.

    I found it a good help as CC is a tough process to go through and inevitably it didnt work for us but this is because it was not the self settling that was the problem and it took a while to figure out what was causing the sleep problem but they did help get to the bottom of it . xx
  • We did it with Lucy and it worked for us.

    It is hard, so hard, and i lay watching the minutes tick by till i could next go into her.....but it was the best thing to help her learn to settle herself to sleep.

    Laura x
  • Hi I did it with both of mine, ds1 was a lot older as settling wasn't an issue for us as he was a thumb sucker (and still is at 6 :roll: ) but with ds2 I did it when I weaned him off the boob going to sleep as he used this to go to sleep and think he was about 7 months may be?? Any way after two naps he was fine and both times I left him 13 mins as he wasn't actually crying all this time there was babbling a bit of whinging and then crying which really was only the lsat minute or so. He has went down really well from then, of course when sick, teething etc he may need extra cuddles etc but when the time is ready again I just follow the same approach and again one nap time is enough, naps would be the only time, if he was going to cry as at night time he is well ready for his bed.

    Also I would suggest a video monitor. some one wrote in the post above about disturbing the baby, this is why I got a video monitor, not for cc but even before this I kept hearing him thinking he had wakened and went up but he was only stirring and me opening the door pulled him out of his sleep. The video monitor is great xx good luck xx
  • Its tough but it does work.

    DS is 15 months and a while ago he went through a stage of waking up in the night - and wouldn't go back down unless we picked him up and cuddled him to sleep.

    So we decided to do CC - it worked first night we tried it (I think we went in after 5 minutes, 6, and then 7 and then he went to sleep). We didn't have to do it again - unless he wakes up for other reasons.

    For example, he is teething at the mo and can't sleep when he has a temperature - so I cuddle him until his temp goes down. I then put him back in his cot which understandably he objects to - but I leave him crying for 4/5 minutes and then go in and lay him down - and because we have done cc a few times he knows that once I've left him for a while I won't pick him up again so now when I lay him down that first time - he stops crying and goes to sleep.

    It is horrible tho - I feel awful for those 4/5 minutes that he is crying his heart out. :cry:
  • Funnily enough I've just had to do it - as he hasn't been sleeping too well at night because of his temp - he is exhausted - but didn't want a nap - I put him down - he screamed for three minutes and then flaked out - five minutes later he is sound asleep! image
Sign In or Register to comment.

Featured Discussions