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In dire need of help? or am I over-reacting, sorry it is HUGE

Wow, that's a lot to take in. There are a lot of issues with this little one.

I can't comment on everything, but my son wasn't potty trained until he was 3 years 2 months old. He would rarely use a potty as he liked the toilet, but if you push it sometimes it puts them off, they like to do things when they feel ready.

My son was also behind with his speech although he could string a decent sentence together by the age of 3, he is cathching up with his school friends quickly since starting this September.

I really think you and his mum should seek some professional advice on the self harming, I haven't experienced this and none of my friends have, at such a young age it's quite a concern.

It's great you are willing to help sort things out. I wish you loads of luck, this child needs your support.

All the best, Zoe.


  • Hello
    Wow that seems quite a lot to cope with and i admire you for seeking help and advice and for being willing to stick by your partner and her son

    I agree with Zoe that you should seek professional advice about the self harmimg and i also think you could mention the crying, i'm not sure it's normal for a child of his age to cry that much.

    I'm afraid that i can't give you much advice as these aren't things i've experienced but i certainly don't think you're over reacting and i think you and your partner should have a talk and decide what help you could get and how together you are going to help this little boy.

    Please let us know how you get on, Tasha
  • Hi there, Im really sympathetic with you. I have come accross some of this behaviour before, but I agree with the others that you really ought to seek professional help with it.
    Forgive me if Im wrong, but are you from America? If so, what health checks and development checks do kids get? Over here, we get checks at 2 and 3 years.
    Maybe you could ask for a checkup with a health professional?
    The only thing to suggest in the meantime is to stand your ground and be firm with him. You already seem like you have that one sussed as he does as he's told when he's out with you.
    Im so glad to see you are sticking by your partner and her child. Its very decent!!
    I wish you lots of luck with this one.
    Please let us know how you get on.
    Kas xx
  • Hi again
    This doesn't solve the long term problem but as shoppings such an ordeal, can you do it online instead?
    I really hope things improve for you all - Tasha
  • Is online food shopping not available in America?!
    How did the shopping trip go last night? - Tasha
  • Hi, It sounds to me like he's having a tough time adjusting to his new life. After all he's moved out of his home into yours and now he has to share his mummy with you and not surprisingly he's kicking off about it the only way he knows how by chucking tantrums and generally being a nightmare. As he hasn't got the language or emotional skills to tell you how he feels, screaming, yelling for his mum at night or doing stuff to get attention is all he can do. I think that he is feeling a little left out at the moment so you need to include him in what you do, like when you shop let him pick things off the shelves and put them in the trolley. Make sure you give him lots of positive attention its so easy to leave them be when they are being good that they have to be bad to get attention.It also sounds like his sippy cup was his comfort blanket and you took it away. Also given that he is so unsettled trying to potty train him just isn't going to work. I would seek advice on his speech as he may need some speech therapy to help improve language skills. Right now this little boy is feeling very insecure and proberbly jealous of your relationship with his mum. Give him lots of love and attention, include him in what you do and don't try to change to many things too quickly. He needs time to adjust to all the changes he's gone through recently. Good Luck and I hope things start to improve soon.
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