child at lo's childminder keeps scratching lo

Archie has come home from the childminder (CM) again today with more scratches on his face from a wee girl that attends CM with him.

CM says the 2 of them just don't get on and it's a battle of wills between them.

However Archie always seems to come off worse. The little girl involved is about 6 months older than him and I don't know her really and only see her when I collect lo. But she is always filthy and wild looking, face dirty and clothes, and seems to be having a tantrum. My lo is never dirty like this so it's not like they are out playing in the mud.
I just think CM finds it hard to give her a clean as she fights her off.

Anyway, what do I do ? Archie's happy and content and doesn't have a problem going to CM. But I don't want him getting scratched etc. And a some point he'll fight back and bite etc. (we have issues with biting at home but so far never been a problem at CM)
CM seems to think there is nothing we can do, as they just don't get on. He's only 18 months old, how can you not get on with him? S x

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  • I find it hard to believe that they just don't get on at that age!!

    Can I ask what procedure your childminder has when your lo has been scratched?? Do you have to sign a form or anything? I don't know the rules for childminders as Shea is in a day nursery and we had a couple of occasions where a girl bit Shea and I had to sign a form when I picked him up, it would state when the incident occured, any marking left on Shea and any treatment given. I then sign it and it obviously covers them if anything gets infected, but they also make the girls mother sign the form too as they then sit her down and chat to her about the girls behaviour. So has the cm talked to the girls mother?? Which I think she should do.
    A similar thing also happened to a colleague of mine, his little boy was getting scratched by a girl at his school and when they delved in they discovered she had 2 older sibling who she fought with all the time and wasn't stopped at home, so she thought it okay to do it to other children.

    I'm not sure what else you can do but I think they really should be talking to the little girls parents more than you
  • Thanks, that's kind of what I thought.

    Claire - my mum collected him today not me and I've not seen him yet as I'm still at work. So I'm not sure if there was an incident form.

    Mrs P, you're right I am upset and unruley is exactly the word I would use.
    I need to call CM tonight to find out exactly what is going on and how she is being disciplined. And what Archies involvement is, maybe he's provoking her ? (I know he stole her bag of crisps once and she lashed out !)

    I'm going to call CM tonight and have a chat. She has her inspection coming up so I might call the childcare commission and ask them to subtly ask about discipline etc.

    Thanks, just wanted an opinion before I go in all guns blazing. S x
  • I would feel exactly the same. Your CM is there to look after your lo and tell them whats right and wrong like nurseries. I know CM get inspected like you say, but Im not sure how much paperwork they have to do. You could always enquire witht eh childcare commission.

    I dont know anything about CMs, but if the CM is finding it hard to tell the girl off, she should be having words with teh mother, and definately not let the girls behaviour affect others. you emnioned the child is foten dirty etc as though she may not let the CM come too close without fighting. I know toddlers do this if they cant do something they want to do. If the CM is struggling she needs to sort this out, surely not looking after the child in question is better than losing other chidlren because of this.

    Hope the talk goes ok, I would suggest having a list of questions you want to ask. I wonder if she would suddenly make an effort if you mentioned about having to consider another CM?!

    My friends mum use to be a childminder and she had a child whos behaviour wasnt the best, and would put her in a seperate room if she did something naughty or try to lash out at another child. I understand children may not always get on, but surely she should be doing something to ensure nothing physical happens.

    I think I would also make sure that her nails were cut too!
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