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Sleep issues with 12month old? HELP - UPDATE

Hi lovely ladies

My dd turned 1 last week and things seem to be getting harder instead of easier, i just feel as though im doing a rubbish job.

She has never been a good sleeper, She was unwell last week and that seems to have made everything worse. She goes to bed 6.30-7pm was still up during the night for a bottle and then wakened about 6-6.30am would have anything between 45-2hours sleep about 10am and that would be her for the day.

Since not being well she has been having 2hours in the morning an 1hr to an 1hr and a half after lunch bed at 7pm and up twice during the night maybe even up awake for a cpl of hours and then waking between 5-6am.

I have tried so many different things over the months different books techniques but nothing works.

Shes very bad at self settling doesnt have a dummy my problem is we live in an end terrace (neighbours can hear through the wall) and think i have got to the point where i need to do cc as i have tried everything else pupd etc. I hate the thought of my dd crying it breaks my heart but im at the end of my tether. I am 11week pregnant and feel i need to get this properly sorted before the baby comes. We are moving in 2weeks to a detached house so will make things easier.

She is such a happy little girl never cries unless she is tired or not well.

So today i have held her off just given her her lunch and she is now sleeping. im hoping this will make her sleep better tonight I work part time and just constantly knackered.

Has anybody got any advice or been through anything similar? Is there light at the end of the tunnel?

How much sleep should she be having during the day?

Any advice appreciated.

From a tired and desparate mummy xxx


Hi ladies

just an update and a thankyou to the ladies that replied. We moved into our house just over 2 weeks ago. DD have been sleeping through from 6.30-6am for over a week now, cant beleive it.

We had to do controlled crying but god it worked so quick, i think i had got to a point i was ready to crack was so tired. She will still have a wee cry but only last about 2mins now.

So thanks again and i would definatley recommend cc, i know it is not for everyone i thought i was in that bracket but i think you reach a point where you are so exhausted and dont no what to do for the best it was the last option.

Love a much happier mummy and dd. xx

[Modified by: jen24 on 19 October 2010 09:13:19 ]


  • hi there, i've had sleep issues with mine, he didn't sleep through til 11 months and had to do cc to get him to sleep through!! He's now 3 and don't have any issues but would like to offer some advice honey.

    I think its time to get a bit tough!! firstly lo shouldn't need a drink at night at one year, so she's probably waking for bottle out of habit and as long as you continue to offer one she'll always take it!! so you need to wean her off the nighttime milk.

    Toddlers shouild be getting between 11-13 hours sleep in a 24 hour period. my boy was having a 2 hour nap and about 10-11hours at night until about 30months then he dropped his nap and now sleeps for 11-12hours at night.
    I think you may need to drop one of her naps, i'd suggest dropping hte afternoon one so she's still tired andready for bed at 7pm, and that is a suitable time for going to bed. Waking at 5-6 is quite early and my lo used to do this and it was a case of being firm, resettling him and telling no its too early and not letting him get up until I was ready (which is just after 6am for us, but 5 am was a killer!!). after a few mornings of him being put back to bed, he soon stopped waking when he realised he wasn;t getting his own way.

    As for self settling, this is another thing that she needs to learn to do and I think she'll need to have a cry when she goes to bed, but don't be too far away and don't leave her for too long, after a few minutes of crying go in, lights low, and soft voice and just sssh her and tell her mummies here but its bedtime now and she needs to close her eyes and sleep, then tuck her in adn walk away, and be prepared to keep doign this for a while, each time leave her for a few minutes longer. I know some don't agree with cc but I see no other way of her learning if you want to stop this cycle.

    its tough and it pulls on the heart strings but the key is to be persistant and patient and also for her to have the same bedtime routine each night and i'm confident after a week you'll see some change for the good.

    Hope this helps honey and let us know how you get on
    Claire xx
  • Hey!
    Have you thought about putting baby to bed later at night? I run post natal exercise classes, and I am a nutritionalist and it is very rare to get a baby who sleeps 12 hours at 1 a child only needs about 13/14 hours a day. Of course it depends on what time you need to be up in the morning, but most of my clients put their babies to bed around 7.30/8 pm, hoping they sleep till about 7am.
    If when dd wakes, if she is asking for milk, I have had a few clients who have watered down the milk, starting with 3/4 milk, next night 1/2 milk and so on...the baby doesn't realise what your doing, and just gets a dis-taste for night time milk.
    Does she have a snack before bed..this might help if she is waking due to hunger.
    And as youve mentioned, I think you need to get it down to 1 nap a day....could you make lunch time earlier? Then she could go down by mid-day x
  • Thanks ladies

    Well friday i gave her her lunch early and she went for a sleep at 12 and i woke her at 1.30pm. Then bed at 6.30pm only woke the once about midnight for a bottle which i watered down but she took the lot.

    Then the same yesterday until she woke at 10.30pm and just about every hour after this. I gave her 2 bottles (which i know is wrong and shouldnt) but she asks for them and screams blue murder until she gets 1.

    Ive tried giving her a cup of milk during the day she will have a few sips but not really interested. I just feel at my wits end. my oh sleeps through and doesnt here a thing. I know i have to get tough but its so hard when you just want a few hours sleep when im working the next day.

    thanks again xx
  • Hi Jen

    How often did you go back and check, when you did how did you re-settle ? Ty is 1 in a few weeks and still wakes for milk at night so is not hungry during the day, trying the watering down method at the moment (night 1) if all else fails then we will have to try CC

  • Hi lilykitt

    I found that when i went back in it just made her worse, so i just left her door open a bit an popped my head round but the most she has cried for is 30mins, did originally do the 10mins intervals. She now only cries for 2-5mins. We tried the watering down milk didnt work think it is more a comfort thing. I just did the same during the night would pop my head round to make sure she was ok and i havent given her a btl since. Good luck it is worth it in the end. xx
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