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sons nan driving me mad!!
Hi
My sons nan is driving me mad! She is a really lovely women and adores my son but he has recently started banging his head to get attention and i have repeatedly asked that she does not fuss over him when he does this becuase it just makes him do it more.
He doesnt do this when he is at home with me, but ive noticed that if he has been at his nans the previous night he turns into a complete nightmare.
Its basically because she spoils him all the time. I told him off when we was there the other day so he through himself on the floor and started screaming. I tried to ignore him as he just does it more but his nan jumped up and told him he could have some toffees if he calmed down. I feel like im banging my head against a brick wall. Anyone got any tips?
My sons nan is driving me mad! She is a really lovely women and adores my son but he has recently started banging his head to get attention and i have repeatedly asked that she does not fuss over him when he does this becuase it just makes him do it more.
He doesnt do this when he is at home with me, but ive noticed that if he has been at his nans the previous night he turns into a complete nightmare.
Its basically because she spoils him all the time. I told him off when we was there the other day so he through himself on the floor and started screaming. I tried to ignore him as he just does it more but his nan jumped up and told him he could have some toffees if he calmed down. I feel like im banging my head against a brick wall. Anyone got any tips?
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Replies
good thinking but i think my oh may have something to say about it. I'll have to have a good talk to her and hope it finally gets through. Her recent thing she is doing is giving him humbugs! I mean how dangerous is that to give an 18 month old. She says she give them to her kids and it didnt do them any harm. hopefully i can get thorugh to her i feel like screaming HES MY SON but i wouldnt do any good lol
I find ignoring her often works a treat! - if your son has one rule with her (or is that no rules) and one rule with you then she will eventually realise that her way is not working. As for safety issues thats a hard one. My MIL thinks all the rules for today are daft - no honey before 1, no peanuts etc and my eldest is allergic to eggs. I honestly think she thinks its all bs and she would just do what she wants in reference to these these things which is worrying.
Could you speak to your oh about your concerns and get him to talk to her for you?? or do you reckon you could find a safety booklet on risks of choking children or discipline issues and lend it to her. OR You could make out that you think you need help because of his head banging etc and you just happened on all this advice and discuss it with her. She would probably think that you discussing/asking her advice is a real compliment whereas really you are just trying to get the more modern attitude of child care over to her! My local library has loads of childcare books which are quite good (I need all the help I can get!)
good luck - i know how difficult it is - I do end up biting my tongue quite a lot rather than being seen as being confrontational!
julesy xx
By the way are there any sweets he does like? chocolate buttons or something? then maybe you could send him to her house with them and then he could have those if he is well behaved - Know which ones I'd prefer to have!
Ha - just had a thought - you could tell her that although it didn't do her kids any harm, defective teeth run in your family and you are worried that his teeth will fall out - she can have a real superiority complex over that one!
[Modified by: julesy on March 24, 2008 09:14 PM]