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toddlers and new babies

ok - so what am i letting mysefl in for lol

riley is a loving child really (apart from aforementioned kevin and perry episodes) he is defo a little mummies boy though and we have a nice close relationship.

i am to be honest expecting some jealousy. what can i do to try and minimise it. im hoping for a start to try and keep him involved and let him hold the baby etc. a bonus is he loves babies and os very loving and cuddley with all my friends babies but they dont live with mummy lol


  • HIya!

    Ethan was only just 2 when Amber was born so it's quite different as Riley will understand a lot more but also worry about things more (sharing mummy).

    Like you said, we kept ethan involved and made sure other than daddy he was the first to see the baby. Are you planning on breast feeding? If so it will be worth explaing that to him. I took ethan along to our local breastfeeding group so he's seen it before but he was still shocked when baby was attatched to mummy!!!

    I suggest trying to keep Rileys routine the same, we had so many people wanting to visit in the evening but we said no as we never normally have a house full of guests at 8pm!!!
    Also where possible let Riley continue to go to whatever groups he does even if that means someone else taking him, we found ethan was much happier and nicer round the baby when he'd had 'his' time.

    If i think of anything else. i'll get back to you!!
    I'm sure Riley will be a star though Let us know how it all goes x x x x
  • hiya Amber!!!!
    Make just as much fuss with Riley and what you would with the new baby.
    Keep visitors to a minmum ie 2-3 each time that way its not so overwhelming for you all and just ask them on the sly! to bring a little present for Riley too.
    Like its been said keep to his routine and continue going to whatever clubs you go to.
    We brought a present for Lydia from George something quite personal, we got her a ballerina necklace. But do the same for riley and also have a presnet that he has chose for the new baby.
  • Hi Amber, I have a much smaller age gap between my two youngest and a big one between Tate and Tom. Still my tips are fairly the same as the others. We did the present thing with Tom he bought a present for Tate and them we got him one from Tate and did the same with Luka with each of them. Carry on doing all the normal things with Riley that you can if people offer to help take Riley sometimes its nice if they can have the baby instead so you can do something with Riley for half an hour.

    I also went to b/f clinic with Tate he was so cute with all the other babies then, he was only 17months himself! But unfortunately I didn't manage to feed either Tate or Luka myself and tried not to beat myself up too much over it.

    With regards to visitors keep it as minimal as poss in the first few weeks say people are coming to see Riley thats what we did! Anyway good luck you will find it does all fall into place and you will quickly forget what it was like to just have had Riley!
  • Hi Amber
    I'm lucy and mummy to all those on my tickers.

    When we had Aaron, Daniel was 3.
    WE planned Daniel's hospital visit with daddy, but that was ruined by my mum bursting in!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    Make it clear to any visitors that come to the hospital to let the 4 of you have your family time. Its so important.
    Thats my one biggest regret.

    We did the gift thing too but only a pressie from Aaron to Daniel.
    Also when you have visitors at home, ask them beforehand to fuss Riley and to tell him that the baby is lucky to have him as a big brother not the other way around ( I read that in an old issue of PP )
    Let him open the gifts for the baby and choose the baby's clothes for the day.
    You could also get him a little dolly and pushchair so he can 'look after his baby' while you are feeding.

    It will all fall into place and if you expect a little unrest then you will only be pleasantly surprised when its minimal.

    I wish you well and look forward to hearing when you have your baby.
    Best of luck.
    Take care X Lucy XXX
  • Hi Amber
    Im sure he will be fine and adjust to haveing a baby around.
    When i took on my niece she was 6wks old and Riley was a total star with he,we sat him down ad explained best we could that she would be here for a while and he was quite happy to help and get involved.He really did suprise us at how well he coped with it all.
  • lucy thats a good idea about the baby. In case anyone is worried about their boys having 'pink' im not but some are. They do a little boy doll in elc and a blue buggy I think they are £6each. Tate wants one.
  • awww thanks for all replies girls.

    some fab ideas in there that i will defo do. he has a pram and dolly already as he does love babies so will bring them down so we can play tpgeather lol. also good idea to open babies presents and let him let the visitors in to see the baby etc.

    i was planning to keep visitors to a minimum - or at least should i say be strict about when as it was a pain when riley was little.

    i have seen a WWE wrestling belt he wants (blame daddy lol) and am gonns get him that from Sam (baby)

    fingers crossed. riley is still my baby iykwim and i dont want him upset
  • Amber I know exactly what you mean. I cried when I saw Tate peeking over the plastic cot in the hospital at his baby brother. He was a our 'baby' and suddenly after 18months of being told so we were suddenly re-naming him the 'big boy' it is sad. But you soon get over it and adjust to life as a bigger family. It is wonderful watching them interact and the love they have for each other (when they aren't fighting!!)
  • awww those pics are fab - i have my camera at the ready lol
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