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who have you told?
Is anyone telling friends and/or family about ttc? My husband wants to keep everything quiet but he was fine about me telling my friends and parents (I couldn't not tell them!) But it feels weird that most people on my side know and no one on his side have a clue...
I guess he doesn't want to get hopes up or have to face the constant questionning but I can't imagine going through this without my nearest and dearest knowing. I should be able to hide it from work colleagues (I'll be driving to every night out to have an excuse not to drink) but I'm sure family will figure it out anyway! When I start refusing the odd glass of wine they'll suss it out straight away! We've been married a year (nearly), we're both 34 and we've just bought a new house... we might as well be wearing t-shirts with "we're trying to get pregnant" on them! And I'm sure my sister-in-law already suspects...
Actually, when I told my mum she said she'd have to try to forget I mentioned it! I think she'd rather I'd said nothing! I can see her point but I think I'm going to need her to cope with this!
Sonia
I guess he doesn't want to get hopes up or have to face the constant questionning but I can't imagine going through this without my nearest and dearest knowing. I should be able to hide it from work colleagues (I'll be driving to every night out to have an excuse not to drink) but I'm sure family will figure it out anyway! When I start refusing the odd glass of wine they'll suss it out straight away! We've been married a year (nearly), we're both 34 and we've just bought a new house... we might as well be wearing t-shirts with "we're trying to get pregnant" on them! And I'm sure my sister-in-law already suspects...
Actually, when I told my mum she said she'd have to try to forget I mentioned it! I think she'd rather I'd said nothing! I can see her point but I think I'm going to need her to cope with this!
Sonia
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Replies
Ive told my mum and thats it. My oh has told everyone on his side and his friends. I thinks it just personal preference. I feel as if everyone will be asking all the time and puts alot of presure on you. But its entirely up to you. How long have you been trying for? xx
Sonia have you stopped drinking whilst you are trying?
Annette
I didn't tell anyone on purpose first time but we had just got married so when everyone asked if we were planning on having a baby i didn't want to lie and said yes. we both worked in a warehouse so everyone knew. this wasn't nice as everyone kept asking all the time. it took 6 months. fell straight away second time so didn't get round to telling anyone. this time everyone in my office knows and some of my friends do. haven't told my family or his but my littlest one (3 yrs) told everyone whilst we were all out having sunday lunch that 'mummy is growing a baby'. everyone thought i was pregnant! i just said we might have another soon!
My plan is not to drink while I'm trying. I know that people get pregnant all the time and have been drinking before they realised but I'm determined to stick to the rules and be a good girl! I may have changed my tune in 6 months time when we're still trying! Everything in moderation I guess.
I'm a little concerned about the questions every month but as most of my friends are in the same boat I probably won't notice much! And my mum's going to try to keep quiet so hopefully I won't feel too much pressure! I agree with you Jo - I don't want to lie to folk so hopefully I don't get asked much. I have a feeling my sister-in-law may ask and the cat will be out of the bag. If she knows then all my husband's family will know and then the pressure will kick in!
My oh & I have each told one person - I've told a friend of mine who's recently had a baby as she understands getting pg isn't necessarily like falling off a tree. OH's told his best mate we're 'thinking about TTC'.
We both live a couple of hours away from our parents sokeeping it secret isn't too hard. As Jo said, I don't want to be asked for progress reports by friends/family/colleagues - I think it'd add pressure.
About 9 months ago I spent an evening with my mates and didn't drink anything - they all started interrogating me & oh. I'm afraid I reacted a bit and told them that even if we were, they'd be told at 3 months and not before. Since then, one of our friends got pg, told everyone straightaway & sadly suffered mmc at 9 weeks. I think this has put off any further Spanish Inquisition.
Work I don't want to find out... we have a bonus system that's quite open to manager's discretion (as opposed to meeting/exceeding clearly defined targets) and I'd be concerned about being treated equally if they knew so I'm keeping v hush. It'd be a tough thing to prove and perhaps I'm pre-judging unfairly but I'd rather not risk it.
Also, it's quite nice, this being oh & my little secret for now!
I'm rubbish at lying so on direct interrogation I will crack! But I still see the whole thing as quite exciting so I'm not bothered if people know. But like you I don't want people to know I'm pregnant until 3 months in... That may be an impossibility... I'll just have to go into hiding for a little while to avoid anyone asking!
My parents won't ask - they're big on Personal Space
OH & I have given up drinking and I've got to say, we both feel really well! A male friend of ours gave up booze about 3 months ago and he looks so well now (lost weight, skin great, etc) he's inspired us both to quit completely & put it all down to a long-term detox!
When does your Rubella test come back? Mine's on Tuesday... I'm anticipating it'll be fine so I'll be gutted if not!
;-)
I'm expecting a good result but I too would be gutted if it's not. My GP said I'd have to wait 3 months to ttc if I need to be immunised! Boo hiss...
My husband has stopped drinking because he had an unusual liver function test recently (non-alcohol related but they don't know what caused it!) and he's already feeling the benefits. We're not exactly heavy drinkers but we do like a glass or two of wine and maybe a sneaky G n T from time to time! We're too old to binge at the weekends! But I'm sure it will do us both good to cut it out. I will miss a nice cold glass of Pinot Grigio though...
Lynne - love your comment! I never really thought about that but I guess I can go pubbing at least once a month until we're successful! All of a sudden I feel much happier!
[Modified by: soniamc on August 23, 2007 10:05 AM]
We went to a wedding not too long ago, and my fiance said, dont tell anyone yet, i told a couple of the wives and girlfriends, and i thought that was that. Later on in the night, stood by the door, someone walks past as says congratulations, i asked what for, he said, you've come off the pill and are trying for a baby arent you?!
I asked how he knew, he said that my fiance had told him in the gents while they were having a wee!! Think he's just as excited as me!