Nervous about appointment Updated with a BIG smile!!!

I have an appointment this afternoon with a fertility consultant and I'm really not looking forward to it.
The letter, which is probably the standard one, says to Mrs A and tells me to take my partner which isn't helpful when you don't have one. My GP dictated a letter explaining my circumstances.
I'm in Leeds and they don't do treatment for single women, even if you pay but I am hopeful that they might at least do investigations into why I'm still ttc after 2 years. I don't know if I am entited to investigations but so hope that I get someone sympathetic rather than someone who thinks that ttc with a donor is bizarre and I should be grateful for the daughter that I do have.
I never look forward to going to new places anyway-although have been to a training day at this hospital but its over 5 years ago and I was pg at the time!! It may well take me an hour to get there and I'll be a nervous wreck!

Thankyou for all your good luck wishes-they must've worked!
I saw a really nice registrar who went over everything and was very understanding. She had to go and check the clinics policy on treating single women and came back and said that if it came to treatment (which she thinks it will) I would have to self fund, which I already knew, and I would have to see a counsellor to determine if I would be a fit, supportive single parent-HEFA regulations. So she has given me a lot of blood tests and swabs to have via my GP and a referal to their counsellor. She said that at my age there is only a 2% chance of pregnancy conventionally and because of my age they wouldn't test my tubes as its likely to be old eggs thats my problem if the blood tests are ok.
She gave me a price list for treatment which was significantly less than I had anticipated but didn't include the drugs, so I'll be off on the IVF board to see if anyone has ideas about drug costs. Anyhow surprisingly they also do embryo donation-presumably leftover frozen ones from IVF so thats a consideration too though the waiting list may be too long even as a paying customer.
She ended the consultation by saying that she hopes she sees me when I go back for the results as I had been so pleasant to deal with. She was just lovely and I sang all the way home!!
On reflection I suppose (allowing for the fact that I might not be deemed suitable) it looks like I'm going to have to decide sooner than I had anticipated whether I want treatment which at the moment I do-I'm not ready to give up my dream yet, and then I need to look into loans or beg my parents for the money. I shall also contact the clinic I'd found in Cyprus for a more detailed breakdown of treatment, costs and how long I would have to spend there etc so that I might be able to be more informed to consider treatment there versus treatment here.
Gosh that was a bit long-well done if you've got to the end-off to write it all on ltttc now!!!

[Modified by: hjanea on 16 February 2010 19:29:24 ]


  • ah Helen good luck, remember everyone has a right to care and it's not their job to judge you only help you if they can. It sounds like your gp is understanding, if they make you feel uncomfortable could you discuss it with them?
    Good luck and keep us posted xxx
  • oh helen i really do hope they understand your situation,just because you choose not to do it their way doesnt mean you shouldnt be entilted to help or at least some kind of investigations

    im sure you will be just fine chick i think if i was you id be nervous also & stay strong image

    PS i do think its shocking to send you a letter like that be it the standard one or not x

    Good Luck

    G xx
  • Hi Helen,

    I so hope they are understanding and helpful for you, I think it's a terrible state of affairs that they don't offer treatment to single women! I just can't believe that in this day and age they don't take every case by it's own so deserve this and another little one born to a lovely caring mummy is very much over due for you!

    Your doctor seems to be understanding enough if they've refered you, so is there anyway they could refer you to another area that does offer treatment for you?? Don't even know if that's possible, but im just so shocked that treatment isn't offered, but couples who are teetering on survival could be treated and then the pressure push them over the edge and they split? Oh it makes me mad!

    Good luck H hope it gives you lots if answers
  • Thankyou Kaiti, Grudie and Em. Im off to get ready now. Will update when I get home, which'll be after tea as I'm going straight to pick G up from my mums.
    My GP was lovely and said to go back if i don't get anywhere.
  • very best of luck xx
  • Good luck Helen, hope they don't give you any grief and you get the answers you want x
  • hi helen.
    i hope you got someone sympathetic and got somewhere today.

  • Hope all went well hun xxxx
  • Hope you're ok hun and everything went well xx
  • Hi Helen

    How did it go? I hope they were understanding and sympathetic - surely people should see that helping a baby be born into a happy and loving family like yours is a mile better than 'single' teenage girls who get pregnant by sneezing?!!

  • Glad u came away happy x

    Hoping you have your BFP very very soon xxxx image xxxx
  • Helen was just about to do a foa to see how you got on today & then saw this.

    Im so so so pleased that you saw someone lovely & she has taken you seriously, sounds like it will be all systems go & im thrilled that you are finally getting some answers hun you really deserve some good news & a step forward. xxx
  • Excellent news pleased you saw someone so lovely! Now if you decide on cyprus and need someone to carry your bags, i'm your woman and I come with an array of local knowledge :lol:
    Good luck with all the tests hun xx
  • so glad you had a good time and got great news helen

    guess you'l have a lot of thinking to do but its your dream chick xxx
  • glad it all went well Helen xxx
  • sounds really positive - really happy you had someone lovely who is going to help you x
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