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Money Worries - how do people afford Babies?

ok so this might sound a bit mad but its really worrying me.

Hubby and I sat down Last night to read through the maternity pack from my work and go through all of our finances just so that we are all clued up.

Well I get 18 weeks of full pay and then 21 weeks at SMP on maternity leave however currently I work so much overtime that I take home half again of my basic salary each month. We - like 100's of other young couples are mortgaged up to our eyes and live right until our last penny including my overtime (bad i know) and thats with out being extravagent as that comes out of overdrafts - oooppss

Basically we have worked out that we can just about to afford to live with my basic salary for those 18weeks by being super duper careful but that I will have to come back to work full time asap. Childcare is not a prob as we work opposite hours to each other so one will always be at home. so that will not be an added expense

However Im interested to know how on earth other people manage because I know we are not unique in our position - im really worrying as I just dont know how in reality we will manage?! Although I know this is not a reason not to have a baby as financially I do not see our position changing drastically unless we win the loteery - yeah right I wish!!!



  • I think there is no set way to manage it, you just do (if that makes sense)
    My hubby works full time permanent position but I am only on a temporary contract so do not get maternity pay. All his wages go on our bills etc and the money I earn each week feeds us and pays for petrol etc. We have no idea how we will cope once lo has arrived, but we will.

    I don't think there is every a time when you are financially stable enough to have kids (unless a millionaire or lottery winner) but you always seem to work around it.

    The other option is to sell up and move abroad, which is what we plan to do in 4 years time image

  • Ive often questioned this and too have worked out salaries - i only get stat maternity but know we'll cope.. and to be honest i was a little annoyed when people said 'you just do' because i thought! Thats not an answer - tell me how lol ...

    but now i know, you do literally cope.!! You'll probably find you spend now because you 'can' and just feel like it and those patterns change alot!... everyone copes... everyone - if you get a payrise ... you spend more... if you get a pay cut... you spend less.. we all adjust...

    Honestly - try not to worry... when we finally fall pg.. i know everything will just be ok

  • hey i would try not worry, me and oh are both 19 with a 4month old baby and HAD to move out, so now weve got a mortagage, bills to pay, baby expensises, but we just manage becuase we have to, theres no choice lol when baba finally arrives everything will fall into place. i dont think it matters when you have a baby, there is always going to be something that could make you think now isnt a good time. just go for it, gd luck xxx
  • Thanks for starting this thread because this is the only thing holding me and OH from starting ttc. (So frustrating!!)

    I am only contracted to 8hrs/week however i usually work 30hrs. My OH is self-employed. I am soooo confused on how much child tax credit/working tax credits/maternity allowance/pay etc i would be eligible for. Any explanations welcome!!!

  • Before dh and I decided to ttc, we sat down and worked out what allowance I'd get and how much we'd need to save for me to be able to afford mat leave. I only get 6 weeks at 90% of my salary and the rest is SMP. That means I'll be losing more than ??1000 a month so we worked out we need to save at least 5k to afford bills, etc while I'm not at work. As soon as my mat leave is up I'll be straight back to work and we'll worry about childcare costs when the time comes.

    Like others have said, you just manage, if you wait until you could afford a baby you'd never have one! lol

  • Ow Huni

    This is something that we ponder on, but try and go with the "it'll never be the right time" saying.
    Theres ALWAYS something that we know we cant afford to do isnt there?
    That handbag that will break the bank but its a must have?!
    That holiday that we soooo desperatley need!
    That wedding we went to that cost the earth?
    Having a baby is that one true blood tie that money cannot come between.
    I try and live every day as if it's my last and enjoy my DH and our 2 children.
    My DH lost his first wife very suddenly over 3 years ago and the children were left without a Mum.
    So i guess im lucky that i have two wonderful children and i couldn't love them more if i tried.
    But it has taught us to live everyday as if it's your last.
    We sat down and worked out our Finances and things just dont add up?
    I will prob have to go back to work Full-Time to stay in the house we live in. Or we will just muddle by until LO is starting school.
    We'll never be rich or welthy in money, but surely a LO is worth every sacrifice?
    Ha Ha i sound so darn serious, life is for living so lets enjoy it! image
    Sod the dollar wanger!
    Babies here we come Yey!
    Dirty Nappies here we come Yey!
    No sleep here we come Yey!
    Sore Nips here we come Yey!
    Crying bundles here we come Yey!

    Why do we wanna do this again? image

    LMAO :lol:

    Clarins xx :lol:
  • Its true what people say that you just do get by. I know thats not really an answer but somehow your finances adjust & you get by. Itsnot easy but its worth it in the end. When I fell pregnant with my 1st I had to stop working right away as what I done was too risky when pregnant & because I worked free lance I wasnt entitled to any money but we adjusted & we got used to not having the extra money so much so that we decided that we could live without the luxuries & I decided to become a full time mum. I absolutely love it & my children are the only luxuries I need now

    Good luck & try not to worry too much

    Hilary x
  • Hi Vickit

    Take a look at our -Rights' section in our -Your life' channel, it has plenty of information and advice, on maternity leave and pay, managing your money when there are new mouth's to feed, going back to work and much more.

    Cut and paste the below link into your browser:

    I hope it helps, good luck with everything.

    [Modified by: webmaster on February 27, 2008 02:12 PM]

  • thanks ladies you have cheered me up image

    Hubby and I are still going to go for it after all like you all say something will always come up and we will never be 100% financially stable especially given my spending habits!! :lol:

    Thankyou webmaster that link is uber helpful and Im going to take a few minutes this evening to have a proper look at it.

    I know we will cope and that its just a case of adjusting its just super scary when all the figures are in black and white it made me wonder how on earth people get by but then like you said you just do image

    Hubby and I are taking charge tonight and getting rid of luxuries that we dont use (like Gym - good intentions to be slim never fufilled!!!! :lol: ) not alot of point paying for something we dont use when we could go for a run on the beach instead (ahem not likely heheh) . I figure we can save ourselves a few pennies each month..

    All in all its been a good spring clean of our finances - hurrah

    Now Back to TTC :lol:
  • Hi everyone,

    Thought i'd let you know how we are getting on as we had our first baby 7 months ago and money was always a worry for us. I got 6 weeks 90% of my pay and then SMP for 33 weeks which has only just run out last week.

    We sat down when we were TTC and made a list of our outgoings and decided to make some sacrifices, eg Gym membership that i never used, changing to a smaller sky package and set oursleves a 'weekend allowance' so that we knew what we were spending.

    We found that once we did this and actually started to keep an eye on what we are spending and checking our bank statement often we werent in as bad a position as we thought. The one good thing we have always done is we have always had to save a lot of money each month as we were saving for our wedding, then saving to get our garden done and some building work. We decided to keep saving this money each month so that we wouldnt get used to having it before baby came along.

    We get about ??18 per week child benefit and about ??80 every 4 weeks child tax credit which really helps.

    I've decided to not go back to work as i really want to be a full time mum so this means that we had to make another sacrifice, selling one of the cars! We are going to sell my hubby's car then just share my car, if i need it for the day i can take him to work and pick him up as its only a 10 minute drive. I know i'm going to find this a pain but that extra money that we are paying in petrol/car insurance/MOT & Tax will be better going into my lo's bank account or put it into an account each month to use at Xmas time or emergancies.

    I'm very lucky in that my hubby is an accountant so he's brilliant with money, although it can be a pain when i get a phone call from him at work asking what i have spent ??20 on in Tesco's today! lol!

    We are TTC No 2 at the mo and i'm not worrying about money this time round as i know we can cope, if sacrifices need to be made there always seems to be something we can cut back on, if not, i'll have to work part time and get my mum to look after my lo.

    Good luck to you all x

    This is a maternity pay calculator, i found hope it really useful xxx

    Thanks from me too girls, i think you've just helped me convince h2b to start ttc this month image xxxxxx
  • i never really thort bout the cost money till the other day ma hubby works frm home n im on benifits n at the mo a hubbys business is quiet hes a computer engineer n we want a baby cos we feel the time is right n cos of the money we can get if we do hve 1

    bt saying that ma sis had a baby last feb n shes only just managing to scrape thru week by week in a way i c thats no way to live bt has no choice bout it coz its hard to find a job here

    i think ppl just learn to cope with how things r n try to make it better if ya can
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  • It appears to be the same feeling with most parents - you just cope!
    My sister has 2 and her hubby currently isn't working, goodness knows how they're coping but they are!

    I think money is holding back my hubby slightly (as we're not officially TTC just yet, in a few months we will be)... but in a few months when we've agreed to try, will that really make a difference?!!!

    I do worry about money, but I just think we'll never have a baby if we wait until we can 'afford' it!

  • I agree Mrs Joo. There never is a GOOD time, unless you're mega rich.

    Perhaps we could start a petition to pay stay-at-home mummys ??20 p/h? (24hr job too!!!) :lol:

  • I'm the same, my hubby and I have been talking for a while about ttc, but are also moving 250 miles away from where we are now, so new jobs all round, trouble is, we both have to take a pay cut but our bills will be just the same as our mortgage wont go down image

    I'd love to think that we'll be ok, but if our income doesn't cover our bills, how will we cope??

    we don't have that many luxuries, unless you count life ins as a luxury!!??

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