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I want a third, hubby doesn't!

Hi, havent been on here for a while as ive been busy witha 3yr ols and a 17 month old lol.

Ive got 2 boys with an 18 month age gap between them, i thought i was quite happy with my boys as we only planned 2 children, but i can't bring myself to say that i don't want another, if i mention it to hubby he just laughs it off and says no chance much just recently ive started thinking about it alot, i don't want one just yet, i want the boys to be at school as i didn't enjoy the short age gap between the boys, its quite a struggle.

But i'm so desperate for a girl i don't think i will feel my family is complete until i have another, i just hope the urge for another will go after a third lol.

Sounds silly but ive always done the ring test to see how many children i will have and i've done it on everyone i know and it has always been right and it says for me that i will have 2boys and a girl, done it on my husband as well and it also says 2 boys and a girl, so i guess at some point down the line i will convince him to have another, but i want him to be happy with it and not to have an unwanted baby so to speak!

Not sure of the point of this but wanted to get it off my chest image any advice is much appreciated image thanks Samantha 27

Replies

  • I would say if you do try 4 another please please not bank on it being a girl. I have 2 boys and tryed every thing to have a baby girl. Got the book, Put the wooden spoon under the mattress lol,Ring test, Chinese gender calendar,BD Timeing, Took the vitamins Got told I by every1 ohhh looks like you are having a girl this time. And it is a BOY !!!!! lol. He is a very much wanted Baby and it took me less than 20 mins to get over it. But just be prepared it could be another little man. Good luck with Hubby, I am going to have to do the same with Baby number 4 ! (alredy think I am set 4 4 boys now lol) x x x
  • hey i could have wrote this myself!

    i have one of each however which makes it so much more difficult to convince hubby! if i had 2 boys im sure he would take less convincing but i am blessed with both so why on earth would i want anymore! people look at me like im an alien! lol!

    i want 3 kids plain and simple and i doubt i will ever change my mind!

    we would need a bigger house a bigger car and more money plus i have just applied to uni to do midwifery (maybe this will squash the urges) so if i get on this course it will be at least 4 years and my daughter will be 6 i doubt i would want to start again lol!

    so im trying not to think about it too much else i will go stir crazy and im not getting any younger at 30 either.

    i know what you mean when you say u want hubby to want it too and not be pushed into it. Dont go on about it too much i did that and it caused arguments i now just drop a subtle hint now and then to let him know i havent given up.

    try and explain that you want a girl and its natural i feel for a woman to want a girl (although i never did till i had one and now i LOVE girls) and if you get a boy then thats ok too and you will be satisfied.

    Take Care

  • Me too!! I don't know why everyone thinks (in general - not you guys!) that it's about what sex your children are as to how many you want. I have 2 gorgeous girls (3 and a half and 8 months) and I really want a 3rd at some point but I would be thrilled with another girl! Hubby on the other hand would love a boy and his main reason for being undecided about a third baby is because he knows there's no way to guarantee a boy. But he has said many a time that if our 2nd had been a boy he'd definitely not want a third whereas I just do not feel done with having babies. Like SamanthatJ23 I just hope that if I convince him to go for a 3rd that I don't feel like I want a fourth as I know I have no chance!!



    Anyway ive not gone back on the pill and don't intend to so hopefully once we're well past the baby stage with DD2 he'll come around. The more distant the memory of having a newborn is getting the more open to the idea of doing it all again he is becoming - a few months a go it was absolutely no way whereas we were chatting yesterday and he said he would possibly consider it. Progress. Yay!
  • Thanks for all your replies! image

    I really think theres no chance of him agreeing to another, but i just can't help but want another, i'd love a girl but i love boys too and would be thrilled to have another boy, its not purely to get a girl, i just love the whole baby thing, pregnancy (although i moan for the whole 9 months!!) and those first few hours with your newborn theres no other feeling like that.

    My sister inlaw has just had a baby boy and i had a lovely long cuddle with him on xmas day and the whole family could see i want another one and they all said i was insane!

    The thing is, i'm allergic to most contraceptive, so i can't take the pill/injection, patch, coil everything! so its just condoms i can use so its never going to be 100%, i suggested my husband had the snip which he has refused so i've always said its down to him how many children we have! lol.

    I think its destiny how many you have and i feel i should have 3, although the thought of 3 does scare me i feel i need it! its a strange feeling, but my heart sinks when i think of never having another baby!

    Our marriage isn't the best at the moment, purely from the stress of raising children so i really don't think its a good idea but how do i tell my body that! its really getting me down! i'm 27 now which i know people may say thats still young but i don't want a baby when i'm in my 30's as i'd worry about health issues for baby!

    My heads all over the place at the minute can you tell? lol i had a pregnancy 'scare' a couple of months ago and when i found out i wasn't i was gutted and this has all steamed from that-i feel i lost something that never existed!
  • thats progress feebs esp if Lo is only 8 months! well done you! my DD is 2 years old now and he still wont even discuss it! i watched one born at christmas and it took me right back! i said to hubby wouldnt it be great to do it one last time and he looked at me in horror! it didnt need an answer.

    i still believe that one day i will have another but i really want hubby to want another too not just me pressurising him into it.

    plus there is so much against it at the moment like 2 upcoming weddings in 2012 - important weddings i will be involved in and wouldnt want to be pregnant or have a newborn lol!

    BUT i have decided that if i dont get on my midwifery course which i have my heart set on i will defo ask him again and he might feel sorry for me and agree lol!



    by which time my daughter will be nearly 4 and at school yay!

    why does it seem that when you want something you cant have its all over the tv! and people all around you are pregnant or have a baby!

    well watch this space ladies you never know!
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