@EmJ3 Matilda has the same first walkers as Charlotte! Just got her new little boots for winter & super cute! Just need wellies but I’m never out ! Rubbish weather here too stuck in & bored 😐 Charlotte climbs EVERYTHING she shouldn’t 🤣 @Louise 111 no bleeding is the first sign of staying positive! 🤞🤞🤞 however I totally understand the just plodding as I’m still in that same position now!! It’s so so difficult ☹️ Going to get an early scan at all??
Emj she is absolutely gorgeous!! Such a little cutie xx I am about 8 weeks. The test strips are still pretty dark but who knows? No I don’t plan on getting a scan at the moment. The thought of the hanging around at the hospital and being told the bad news makes me feel sick.
Hope you are feeling ok MMA and coping with the half term mayhem xx
@Louise 111 I know the scans are really emotional aren’t they. They’re a bit like torture. It’s such an extreme, either the best day ever or the worst- No in between and it’s draining. It’s the only way to really know how things are going though isn’t it. You have a few weeks to build up the courage but surely the EPU would give you an early scan, if that’s what you wanted.
There’s no reason to think they this one couldn’t be your little miracle. It’s a totally new pregnancy. How’s your hubby about it?xxxx
Yes I expect epu would scan me but I’m just too scared. They keep you waiting then have to chat to you then keep you waiting again then chat again. If you could walk in, be scanned and have to make no conversation and walk out I could do it. Maybe I’m a bit odd. Last time I went was New Year’s Day when I found I’d lost one. The lady remembered me as she’d seen me a few times when I’d had bad news. She was so lovely but she must have thought it’s that old nutter again who hasn’t realised her time has passed 😔 Maybe if I get to 10 weeks with no bleeding I’ll have to contemplate it. I have actually felt some stretching today but then I know in the past I’ve had the placenta still growing but not the baby . I look at my 3 year old and think how could my body do it then but yet deteriorate so quickly. Nature is a strange thing.
@Louise 111 I totally get you! You're talking to the biggest scan nutter ever. I totally embarrassed myself at the Epu after Jacob, I went for a scan twice, with the pregnancy after him and cried throughout the meeting, then told them I didn’t want a scan etc and made a total show of myself. it was full on ugly crying, not polite little tears.
I wasn’t much better with Matilda either but I couldn’t face the Epu, paid for a private one at about 10/11 weeks. I got it in my head, that I could cope more if the setting wasn’t as clinical and there were less people about!! I don’t know, I logically knew that wherever I got scanned it would be the same result but it just helped.
We find strange ways to cope. Definitely self preservation! We know how painful bad news can be.xx
Oh you poor thing. What a horrible thing to go through. I bet the nurses wanted to cry with you as they would have very much understood your upset. Yes I’ve thought about going to a private one because that is easier to walk in and out of but I just have it in my head that the staff are thinking you’re expecting good news and everyone else is happy whereas at least at epu they know you are there because of concerns. So I guess I’ll just wait and see what happens for now. Hope the weather improves and we all get to get the little ones outside .
@missmyangels she is just gorgeous!! Love those boots too! She looks like you! How cute is she going to be with her baby sister? They’re going to be as thick as thieves!!🤣🤣🤣xxx
Thanks ladies love her to bits ,she’s so special to us & always will be after what’s been thrown at us on our ttc journey! I was worried about not bonding so much with this new baby. Now she’s starting to wriggle it’s getting easier to fall in love ( I know it sounds silly !) I know you’ll understand as it sounds awful eh but Charlotte we tried soooo long & fought so hard for her! I cried at the start of this pregnancy as I was scared I couldn’t love another baby as much😢 I know when this lady is born I will be fine & we will all love her to bits! ❤️❤️❤️ Just these crazy thoughts that go through our heads 🤦🏻♀️ Now driving myself insane as my movements haven’t been as much as I would like which is sending my anxiety wild & convinced this will go wrong HV visits don’t start until November 18th next scan at 28 weeks I’m 22+1 it’s so far away 😢 So glad I have you to talk too I’m drowning in my own thoughts & I don’t like to panic hubby as he struggled to get involved with this bubba due to all this not being allowed into appts !! @Louise 111 hope u r ok this morning ❤️ @EmJ3 any thoughts if you’d like another? 🤪🥰
Hi mma. Can’t write a long reply as Charlie grabs my phone off me but just wanted to send hugs and say everything you’re thinking and feeling is totally understandable. Your little one will be so truly loved xx
Your anxiety is totally understandable! losing Oliver like you did creates such emotional anxiety for future pregnancies. It’s a lot like torture! Are you still using your Doppler?
I do wonder If boys, for whatever reason, don’t fight as much In the womb because they’re so laid back??? Might be totally scientifically inaccurate I don’t know, it just makes me wonder.
I felt a little better knowing I was having a girl, but it could just be another example of self preservation and hope!!!
I also understand your bond with Charlotte, she was your little miracle and is a symbol of hope and happiness!! Your gorgeous rainbow!! This New little lady also symbolizes all of those things and will be just as special I think, because you know all too well, how wrong things can go!
I sometimes feel a bit guilty on my other 2 children with how special Matilda is to me. I don’t love her any more than them but I honestly never thought I’d actually take home another baby! She brought so much happiness to us all! It’s a special bond when you spend 9 months panicking 100 times a day!!🙈🙈
if you’re even slightly worried, I would go up to get checked (if the Doppler doesn’t help) because the anxiety is awful! Local lockdowns aren’t helping either are they as everything is disrupted!
I’m feeling pretty rubbish. Tired and fed up with life in general. I also think my lines on my tests may be getting lighter which obviously isn’t helping my mood. I did a test earlier on today and it looked pretty light but it was only in a little bit of wee. Do you know whether the amount of wee you dip it in makes a difference? I’ll have to try another later when I feel like I can do a proper wee.
Just had a message saying my daughters off school next week due to there not being enough teachers. It sounds awful but she’s such hard work at the moment and I was so glad she was going back to school today. She wears me out.
@Louise 111 your lines will get lighter at around 8-9 weeks mine always do!! There’s a reason for it but I’ve forgotten the name it’s given so don’t worry 🥰😘It’s very tough when the kids are at home my kids all argue & it’s very very stressful on top of trying to do work with the kids & entertaining Charlotte,housework washing,the list is endless & now lockdown again & the stress of shopping & Xmas is upon us again!!
I totally agree @Louise 111 and @missmyangels- it’s hard work with the kids at home!!! As much as we love them, there’s just no break is there.
yes I’ve read about tests getting lighter- I think it’s the hook effect or something! Fingers crossed Louise!! I really hope this is a strong little bean. Have you thought about a scan yet? Or are you still dreading it?
@EmJ3 worries are still there I think baby is active at night so not feeling loads throughout the day which I find hard ! I’m trying to take time after I eat and drink to feel for fidgeting which 5/10 she will it’s still like tickles defo hands & feet low down still & to the left & right so she must be stretched out across ways I dopple of an evening heart rate is 150bpm easier to find now. If I stress in the day I use it too. BP has settled nicely now I’m on 100ml twice per day of my meds I’m 5months 3 weeks on Wednesday & look forward to big big movements!! I do feel rolls when she turns:) im sure I read in my notes that my placenta is across the front which will muffle movement but I’ll check on my next appt in 2 weeks In the meantime if I stress I shall just go & explain my worries as I had so many more appts with Charlotte which kept my crazy thoughts at bay ( ish) 😖😖😖
The hook effect by the way yes that’s it! It’s to do with hormones going quite high & the test can’t cope so to speak!!
@missmyangels you’re doing well with it and you know you can get through it because you’ve got Charlotte as proof. its not easy though, anxiety is ridiculous! Glad the Doppler is helping a bit though! It’s so much better when they’re a bit bigger and you can find it quicker! xxxx
I’m glad your Doppler is reassuring you. Hopefully baby will be keeping you awake at all hours soon so there’s no doubt she’s ok . I couldn’t feel much with Charlie as I had far too much amniotic fluid but luckily I was scanned weekly.
I’ve done another test and it’s definitely quite a bit lighter than they were so I’ve googled the hook effect you both mentioned. It says to dilute your urine 50/50 with water to see if that makes the line darker because supposedly the test should cope better with a lower dose of hcg. I’ll prob end up with no line at all but I’ll give it a try.
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@Louise 111 no bleeding is the first sign of staying positive! 🤞🤞🤞 however I totally understand the just plodding as I’m still in that same position now!! It’s so so difficult ☹️
Going to get an early scan at all??
being pregnant after loss is really hard isn’t it- right until the birth!!! Have you got any names yet?
Xxx
I am about 8 weeks. The test strips are still pretty dark but who knows? No I don’t plan on getting a scan at the moment. The thought of the hanging around at the hospital and being told the bad news makes me feel sick.
So glad I have you to talk too I’m drowning in my own thoughts & I don’t like to panic hubby as he struggled to get involved with this bubba due to all this not being allowed into appts !!
@Louise 111 hope u r ok this morning ❤️
@EmJ3 any thoughts if you’d like another? 🤪🥰
Enjoy the rest of 1/2 term still dismal here!
I also understand your bond with Charlotte, she was your little miracle and is a symbol of hope and happiness!! Your gorgeous rainbow!! This New little lady also symbolizes all of those things and will be just as special I think, because you know all too well, how wrong things can go!
if you’re even slightly worried, I would go up to get checked (if the Doppler doesn’t help) because the anxiety is awful! Local lockdowns aren’t helping either are they as everything is disrupted!
Sending you a big hug.😘😘xxx
yes I’ve read about tests getting lighter- I think it’s the hook effect or something! Fingers crossed Louise!! I really hope this is a strong little bean. Have you thought about a scan yet? Or are you still dreading it?
How’s your anxiety/worry @missmyangels?
I’m 5months 3 weeks on Wednesday & look forward to big big movements!! I do feel rolls when she turns:)
im sure I read in my notes that my placenta is across the front which will muffle movement but I’ll check on my next appt in 2 weeks
In the meantime if I stress I shall just go & explain my worries as I had so many more appts with Charlotte which kept my crazy thoughts at bay ( ish) 😖😖😖
The hook effect by the way yes that’s it! It’s to do with hormones going quite high & the test can’t cope so to speak!!
its not easy though, anxiety is ridiculous! Glad the Doppler is helping a bit though! It’s so much better when they’re a bit bigger and you can find it quicker!
xxxx