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Hi everyone! I'm new and have my first question!

Hi girls,

This is my first post in this forum, like all of you, I didn't think I would find myself here but hoping to get to know some of you lovely ladies and help each other though this.

Well, my story is that, 2 weeks ago today when I thought I was 14 wks pregnant, I had some bleeding so I went to EPU, they couldn't find the heartbeat, they scanned and my baby had died at 11+3, the same as the day we had our 12 wk scan - we saw the heartbeat that day and spent the following weeks telling the world our wonderful news, little did we know it was already gone. It's heartbreaking and am in tears as I type this. I had to have the operation (I never know what its supposted to be called) last week as I just could not bear waiting for it to happen or to see my baby.

I feel I'm ok, if I'd ever though this might happen to me, I would have thought I would just curl up in a ball and die but I'm alright and with my wonderful DH and the thought that "I WILL get pregnant this year" going through my head everyday, know I'll get through this.

The docs etc advise to wait 2 or 3 periods before you start TTC, from what I've read on the net, it's just best to wait til your first AF before you start so they can date you. So my question is this... after MC, how long did you wait or are you waiting before TTC??

Look forward to talking to some of you soon xxx

Replies

  • Hi Amber

    First of all let me just say how so sorry I am you are having to join us over here. Life is cruel sometimes but the girls over here are so lovely and helpful so your in good hands.

    As for TTC i believe its really a personal choice. My midwife told me to wait 6 weeks before we started trying but I just waited for the bleeding to stop then started trying. I have had 2 AF since the mc so I havent been lucky enough to catch yet. I am hoping for a BFP at the end of this month!

    Just take each day as it comes, when the times right you will be pregant again. Just makes sure you rest and relax and get plenty of love and cuddles of your OH.

    Sending you lots of love and strength sweets

    xxx
  • Hi Amber,
    Im so sorry to hear your devestating news but hopefully i can put a positive spin on things for you. Last September at 15 weeks i too had a small bleed and after a trip to the local epu we also found our baby had died just after we had seen its little heartbeat at our 12 week scan. Like you we were both completely devestated at the time and i too had to go into hospital for an op. We were advised that although it would be helpful for dating purposes to wait for af, there was no medical reason why we couldnt ttc as soon as we felt ready. In the end we did wait for 1 af but within 6 weeks of having my op i was pregnant again and am now nearly 28 weeks with our beautiful little man and i really couldnt be happier.
    I hope this doesnt upset you, i just wanted to share my experience with you as it was so similar to yours. Just make sure you take time to grieve for your little one and try not to bottle things up. I found it really helpful to talk about things. I also found that a bloody good cry doesnt do any harm now and again.

    Take care hun, if you need to chat, please feel free to message me xxx
  • Hi Hun,

    I'm so sorry that you've had to come over here. I was new last week too and it sucks. My baby was only 6 weeks when i lost it and last week was horrendous! I'm finding this week a bit better as i'm focusing on trying again, similarly to you.

    I'm not waiting for af before we try again, i finished bleeding yesterday and i intend to get down to ttc tonight image

    I think they only ask you to wait for AF for dating purposes but i don't want to wait personally. Also, they say you're more fertile after a mc so if you feel ready then go for it i say!

    Good luck and i really hope you get a sticky bean soon hun!
    xx
  • Thanks for your kind messages

    bubsplease, thanks for such a nice welcome, Hope you get your BFP soon!!

    Kazza, congratulations! Your story didn't upset me, it gives me hope so thank you!

    Lady2188, am so sorry to hear what you went through but you sound v positive - hope you get your BFP soon!!

    I think I'd quite like AF to show so that I know when I'm oving etc but I'm sure we'll get on the case as soon as the bleeding stops - it's been a while!!

    Thanks for responses - I'm sure we'll speak again soon xx
  • hey Amber

    so sorry to hear what you have been through, but you are in good company.

    I bled for a week after my mc and started TTC straight way. It is only 3 weeks since tomorrow since i actually miscarried but it feels like so long ago. I am getting through it all by focussing on TTC, and am really excited about it.

    You have to do what is right for you. I think a lot of people wait for at least 1 AF.

    If AF arrives with me before a BFP then i am going to use the clearblue fertility monitor... excited about that too!

    good luck, keep your chin up and here's to some sticky baby dust for us all!

    xxx
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